Scales

Very sad. If it was a suicide it immediately seems a case of an egocentric identity crisis. Some people lose themselves when they lose their "success." That's a guess.

The Grand Duel (parte Prima) - Luis Bacalov

Watching a PBS program on lobotomy.

Its a spoof trailer but it had me laughing hard.

http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/06b666ae7...stopper-trailer

There's a lot of great music I've found so far and its a hard pick, but the Apocalyptic Neo-Folk band Rome is probably my favorite currently, if just barely, for the epic ambiance. I had heard that term and didn't know it was a genre. I'll definitely check it out. Nothing wrong with dark role-models, thank ya. I heard The Gun Club awhile back, I have yet to sift through 'em. Thanks for the list. Sweet, I'll check 'em all out. Sounds interesting, I shall. --- Thanks much to everyone.

I can't stay completely on topic even in my own topics.

Thanks for the recommendations, I'll check all these out. (I've decidedly got rid of the vocal preferences.)

I'm looking for Darker Folk/Gothic Americana/Darker Western music. Even though Project Playlist is limited to what's all there so I may or may not find anything. I know there are a lot of D.J.'s and music-lovers on here so I thought I would ask before I go skimming through Last.FM like I'm getting paid for it, when in reality I'm just obsessed. Here is what I have so far to help with what I'm into for this playlist.. not all of it is dark but its personal taste: http://www.playlist.com/playlist/15179198219 Thanks for reading.

I've decided my singleness is more than likely terminal. I don't want kids, I have radical political ideas, I'm an Atheist, I deal with my flaws on my terms, and to an intellectual degree I view status and money as worthless and temporary, which I think these all act against me generally in dating. If being myself can't get me more money, or more status in society, or in a real, lasting relationship-- its not my problem, its my blessing. The idea of being single doesn't affect me emotionally as much as it used to. I've seen a lot of manipulative and gullible people go through chains of bad relationships, some who I cared about a lot. These days admittedly, whether its more disassociation or sadism, I just want to silently see chaos run its course. Being single or lovesick seems like quite painful loneliness. I've been in both those boats, both should be stashed with chocolate. The more that I live though, the more I view loneliness as a lie of time and distance. This post was brought to you by Frank Sinatra's "My Way."

http://www.ted.com/ There are many other stuff on there that are interesting. (Up late, not spelling grammar orderly correct).

This guy is a total player. http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/stuart_...it_s_vital.html

Okay, ironically I have recently deleted my browser cookies. The img tag in this reply shows that the chocolate chip cookie picture is still there, but I do not see it.. I am now officially insane: to the power of 6. This is so messed up, that I seriously, f***, d***, I dunno what's going on anymore. Penguins.. ceramic penguins.. This makes no sense, my hodge/podge will never be the same.. there's no reason for anything but Dr. Pepper, please make an FZERO for Wii.. FML, and may whatever can help us save us all because its gone. The COOKIES ARE GONE, SH**! Everything bad happens on Sunday.. its always gloomy, and when its not you think Saturday happened twice. I give up with this.. I don't even know anymore.. This is me, this is going to be me forever.. because the mystery cannot be solved. Nietzsche got together with Watson and pronounced that Sherlock Holmes is dead. It's an impossible conundrum. F*** it. Rock on.

Avis Baphomet! Praise his name on high (oven settings)!

No problem. Its a difficult thread to talk about but anxiety/depression is something worth bringing up since globally its not stopping anytime soon. --- I do try to look at things from multiple perspectives. At the risk of being cynical, the reality of my medication is that I am one of many people inducing a long-term drug addiction to fight mental-illness. The klonopin helps fairly well with anxiety, but SSRI's for me, are kind of like their own specific numbness you put to the right dosage, and stay on long enough to hopefully change the deeper roots of whatever is going on. I still have/battle with depressive episodes, just earlier today I was listlessly kind of sulking around.. but I also have genuine moments of happiness. I will keep studying "mood disorders," and related theories, as well as their relation to "positive psychology," which I find very interesting.

Gratitude and uncertainty. I feel there are a lot of people I'm hoping the best for in life and love, probably more than I'll ever meet.

Which is why a ridiculous deal of practice is needed before it can be done, thus resulting in the reality that someone has trained themselves to do nothing more than step around in circles like a clock. I can barely do it and I came up with it (I think).

Calm and sleepy.

I came to DGN with a mission.. To find John Conner. (But not really.) I love DGN because of DGN'ers. I love, cherish, and respect a lot of people on this site and others that used to be on here. Good friends are no different than family. Though I'm off in no-man's land and don't consider myself heavily involved in the Alternative/Gothic scene, I hope to someday change that in one way or another. I consider this place family.

I have looked at myself in the mirror while trying to free-dance, and it was very embarrassing. The time when I break-danced and I *thought* it looked good is long gone.. But.. I did come up with this. A dance of discord not recommended for drunks or anyone really. But I figure I might as well unleash it to the world. The Chaos Star Start from a center point with both feet positioned together. 1. Move right foot up a step, then back down to the center point. 2. Move left foot down a step, then back up to the center point. 3. Turn 45 degrees to the right quickly. 4. Move left foot up a step, then back down to the center point. 5. Move right foot down a step, then back up to the center point. 6. Turn 45 degrees to the right quickly. 7. Start back at number 1. Keep steps in the beat of the song and try to go for the fastest tempo possible without losing the center point or getting dizzy. Practice at slower tempos until you get the hang of it.

Indent. Indented. Indentedest.

I thought someone haxored me and I was like, "Shit, I've been compromised. Report to HQ." ..so I went back to SMPT.

For some reason, something like Rambo from the movies.. War paint, camo khakis, and a headband.