Scales

I borrowed it from my sister, but I'm pretty sure its in bookstores. The book is basically about being in the present moment, so because of this its fairly repetitive. I am critical of the book now because being immersed in the present without the balance of time could easily become suspension of reasoning. Though on a positive note, it temporarily helped me a lot and gave me a insight on thought based in time.

Observation:

The narrow door to motivation is somewhere in a bunch of negative subjectivity.

The instrumentation reminds me of Human League. I like electronica like this that seems cheesier then the more serious electro-industrial, but is super catchy.

Since I don't think this was posted on here yet. http://www.gothic-charm-school.com/ http://www.youtube.com/user/GothicCharmSchool

I feel like there is a whole layer of experience with silence that I want to place in a realm of logical formula which has driven countless people away from logic. That everything of a non-survival nature which is sought-out can be emotionally gain-able thus eliminating the desire for it (though I've felt this for a long time). I feel as opposed to having the crap overtly beat out of me mentally like this week, I should just continually load up with positive programming without losing the ground of reasoning.

America definitely is violent, I'd like to remember a time the news wasn't riddled with homicide. We are a free country trying to protect our individual freedom through the system that's taking it away. We proudly come to the idea that freedom isn't free, so our freedom is always under siege. I think we need to legalize and regulate drugs to curb the addiction to conflict; I personally refuse to debate anyone here till I've developed chronic pain. Lol.

Editors, yo.

Passionate.. if I have a Christian funeral someday, I want it to at least be said that I went to Hell.

I've clocked in hundreds of hours into Bethesda games so I'll have to check this out!

I've become bitter towards dating, among other things. I am definitely a fighter over a lover, in my circumstances by choice of reason. Being single in the long term is one place where I can say I chose my battles.

Down and unmotivated. But better than last night.

Recently finished: Exploring the Crack in the Cosmic Egg: Split Minds & Meta-Realities by Joseph Chilton Pearce The Dhammapada Reading: god is not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything by Christopher Hitchens The Dark Side of the Universe by James Trefil

On top of finding a doctor which would be tough, I gave up gelatin from my stint with lacto-vegetarianism and don't touch capsules. Oh well. End of my thread-jacking. *Thumbs Up* (Can't get to the emoticon >.<)

Woke up at 10 PM, killing off a 12 pack of Dr. Pepper, gonna be on a lawnmower in 2 hours. I love it.

/Super Sexy Hemp Defense I do think that Cannabis, if legal, would be just as viable as a coping mechanism as prescribed anti-depressants, though more optional in being as rigidly regimented. I am less nervous in anxious situations, more ambitious, and more happy on weed than any of the four anti-depressants I've tried. Though I'll probably start smoking small cigars more ritually then go on another anti-depressant, or risk getting arrested for a harmless plant. /Super Sexy Hemp Defense

This picture won't let me link it. But here it is.

Alright, sweet.

Keep a look-out for the Disney castle and the flying dog. Lmfao.

Junk food.

The night my dosage was doubled to what it was going to stay at with Wellbutrin I had heavy suicidal feelings and a nervous breakdown. I was only on it for a week. It definitely sucks. I went off it cold turkey which I've done with every anti-depressant I've been on (ironically I just thought about that), and dealt with withdrawal in SSRI's, I did do go cold turkey because I trusted myself to make it through. Some people have a lot of problems even tapering off, though this is moreso with serotonin reuptake drugs.

Reading novels Writing half the time Playing instruments Singing - That's a tough one. Gaming Smoking cigarettes Drinking to get drunk Wanting as much as I used to

Hopefully Vortex will start his own act because he has some kick-ass vocals.

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