trust me, i've been to the state of insanity, i have done a swan dive head first over the ledge and past the point of no return. from facing one brutal situation to the next, i've not had a pretty life and i have been very hardened by it all, then i suddenly realized that insanity is simply relative, it's all on the perspective of things. and I can handle life very well, i've been clean of weed for 2 months now. and alcohol for one month. but shit.. it sure was fun as fuck when i was doing that stuff though. But during the trips through my hell and insanity, as well as the vacation on my weed binges.. i've come to one conclusion... fear nothing, don't look back, and in wichever direction you choose to go, give it your all, even if it does mean you're crazy to do that, that's the only way that I'll be able to acheive any such goals i want, along wtih finding someone decent in my life. and when I find that special someone... it will be the match that everyone else will be jealous of.