CixWicked

I'm feeling anxious, a little lonely and productive. Got my PC pulled apArt, cleaned, added Ram, now running disc repair, also practicing Guitar...thinking about the work I didn't get to at work today and wishing certain DGNers lived closer...(you know who you iz. Also... Haven't been on in a while.., nostalgia!!!

Hurt and betrayal are very familiar sensation. Sunday I was told that basically because my child mothers friend was coming over, that I wasn't welcome there to see my children, because her friend and I don't get along. (Basically this friend of hers and I used to be very very good friends, but she basically turned on me for reasons unknown to anyone by herself and my ex wife). So I left without incident, and then wrote her an email explaining how hurt I was. She responded by telling me that 1. she didn't do anything wrong. 2. that my girlfriend (Whom both our dauthers love, and whom she herself has said is awesome) shouldn't be coming to her house (As if we were planning on hanging out with her), 3. If my feelings got hurt too bad because I don't contribute to my children so basically she can treat me any way she wants. So let's get this straight... I drive from Troy to Dundee at least once a week to take our children out too do -something- on my own dime (Never once has she offered to meet me at the front door let alone even a quarter of the way there.) She receives child support as long as I'm working, and refuses to give me joint custody and has even told me in no uncertain terms will they -ever- stay with me... but has the audacity to tell me 1. I don't spend enough time with them and 2. that I don't contribute. Mind you she lives with her mother (The girls grandmother) who babysits the children between 10 and 24 hours each day while she goes off to play games with her friends, goes out to the bars at least twice a week, and is present at many -many- social events, and organizational events. Now mind you this is a woman who explained to me not 3 weeks ago that she still loves me. Yeah... MUST have been the love. Is there a reason people just feel the need to kick me in the balls every chance they get? You know how I feel? Like the lowest common denominator. CixWicked

Champagne by Chavo, then LOTS AND LOTS of Halestorm. LOL I'm so inlove with this band.

Ask her to teach me Water bending...

"MARCO!!!"

Like Rhyme or Reason... "My head wont leave my head alone... And I don't beleive it will... till I'm dead and gone" Cix

Offer her one of my DELICIOUS Oreos.

It was freaking Brilliant. Can't to see what else Gar's got hidden beneath those sleeves. Cix

Hope she forgets to erase her ranting...

Ask her if she really has no bananas...

In my best Michael Jackson voice say. "You ain't bad... YOU AIN'T NOTHIN!!! Heee hee heee..." Then I'd do a little dance, and grab myself provocatively.

You should see some of the lyrics I wrote... My guitarist goes. "Look at you trying to be all Rock star, misspelling words, and carrying on..." My GF goes. "Umm... no, he's a horrible speller... to his feeble mind, that -looks- right." lol

LOL... Alrighty. Cix

Hell yeah, shoot me an email. I'll have things to you by the tuesday before my posts are due, so you're not rushed to do anything. AND don't be afraid to give me pointers about content as well as presentation. "Umm... yeah, the purple cow comment is kind of cheezy... i'd loose it if I were you..." Not a big deal. Thanks again Rev. Cix

So I went through and did some of the editing as suggested by The Sweet Ninja Rev. LOL. Again, I apologize, I realize my spelling and grammar are -HORRIBLE-... they always have been. But I'll work on making sure that things get a lot better and a lot easier to read. IF -ANYONE- has questions, or comments, I'm all about them. I'm an open book, and you all have crayons... feel free. LOL. God that sounded terrible. Cix Oh, and by the way... I tend to throw in way too much extra grammatical content. Commas and apostrophes flying every which way. People tend to laugh their asses off at me for this. ::SHRUG:: I'm working on it.

AWESOME... I'll go in and fix all these errors right now. I apologize for putting you guys through this stuff... I'll get better, but I'm -really- terrible with Grammer, and the likes. It's a flaw that I'm trying to better, so any and all feed back to make my work more readable/enjoyable is more than welcome. Cix

Call Me Wrap me in a bolt of lightning Send me on my way still smiling Maybe that's the way I should go, Straight into the mouth of the unknown I left the spare key on the table Never really thought I'd be able to say I merely visit on the weekends I lost my whole life and a dear friend I've said it so many times I would change my ways No nevermind God knows I've tried [Chorus] Call me a sinner, call me a saint Tell me it's over I'll still love you the same Call me your favorite, call me the worst Tell me it's over I don't wan't you to hurt It's all that I can say. So, I'll be on my way I finally put it all together, But nothing really lasts forever I had to make a choice that was not mine, I had to say goodbye for the last time I kept my whole life in suitcase, Never really stayed in one place Maybe that's the way it should be, You know I've led my life like a gypsy I've said it so many times I would change my ways No nevermind God knows I've tried [Chorus] Call me a sinner, call me a saint Tell me it's over I'll still love you the same Call me your favorite, call me the worst Tell me it's over I don't wan't you to hurt It's all that I can say. So, I'll be on my way I'll always keep you inside, you healed my Heart and my life... And you know I try. [Chorus] Call me a sinner, call me a saint Tell me it's over I'll still love you the same Call me your favorite, call me the worst Tell me it's over I don't wan't you to hurt It's all that I can say. So, I'll be on my way So, I'll be on my way So, I'll be on my way

Awesome!!! Thanks for your input guys. This goes a long way toward helping me improve the nature of my musical machine (Misconceived). And thank you -so- much for the kind words IsleofRhodes... It means a lot to me. Cix

The Streetz R death row Growing up as an inner city brother where every other had a pops and a mother I was tha product of a heated lover Nobody knew how deep it screwed me and since my pops never knew me my family didn't know what ta do with me was I somebody they despise curious look in they eyes as if they wonder if I'm dead or alive poor momma can't control me quit trying ta save my soul, I wanna roll with my homies a ticking time bomb can't nobody fade me packin' a 380 and fiending for Mercedes suckers scatter but it don't matter I'm a cool shot punks drop from all the buck shots that fools got i'm tired of being a nice guy i've been poor all my life, but don't know quite why so they label me a lunatic could care less death or success is what I quest cause i'm fearless now tha streetz R Deathrow [Chorus] (cause i'll beat you down, like it ain't nothin') tha streetz R Deathrow (cause i'll beat you down, like it ain't nothin') tha streetz R Deathrow I just murdered a man, i'm even more stressed wearin' a vest hopein' that their aimin' at my chest much too young to bite tha bullet hand on tha trigga I see my life before my eyes each time I pull it I hope I live to be a man must be part of some big plan to keep a brotha in tha state penn counting pennys over tha years I'd done stacked many proven wrong those who swore i'd wouldn't live till twenty now they gotta cope since it's tha only thing I know it's difficult to let it go i'm startin' to loose my hair cause I worry hustlin' to keep from gettin' buried but now I gotta move away now cause these suckers wanna spray where I lay down my homie lost his family and snapped shot up half tha block to bring them back tha streetz R Deathrow [Chorus] (cause i'll beat you down, like it ain't nothin') tha streetz R Deathrow (cause i'll beat you down, like it ain't nothin') tha streetz R Deathrow (cause i'll beat you down, like it ain't nothin') tha streetz R Deathrow (cause i'll beat you down, like it ain't nothin') (like it ain't nothin') i'm dangerous when drunk I only drink beer gin makes me sin unable to think clear heneesee, makes me think my enemy is getting close BOOM BOOM BOOM got me shooting at a ghost some call me crazy but this is what you gave me amongst tha babies, who raised up from tha slavery I sport a vest and hit tha sess to kill tha stress moved out west and I invest in all tha best those who test will find a bullet in they chest put ta rest by a brotha who was hopeless grow up broke on tha rope of insanity how many pistols smoking coming from a broken family i'm sick of being tired sick of tha sirens, body bags, and tha gun firing tell bush to push tha button cause i'm fed tired of hearin' these voices in my head tha streetz R Deathrow [Chorus] (cause i'll beat you down, like it ain't nothin') tha streetz R Deathrow

1. What makes you an avaid fan of a band? The sad part of this is that I really have no idea. Useually the big name bands that I've been a fan of were bands that caught me with a song that someone else was listening to (Like Avenged Sevenfold became one of my favs after my guitarist was trying to learn the guitar riff for 'Bat Country'). Either this, or if I hear it more than a few times on the radio. I -am a fan of bands local like Relek, Altered Paradigm, and Down in Hollywood and I can tell you what I like about them, but as far as what would make me an avid fan (Being the type of person who checks their myspaces to find out when their shows are going on), I don't know. I feel like I should be, but haven't for some reason. 2. What goes into being an avid fan? To me, being an avid fan is going to shows, and being excited to hear new material by them Being excited about getting hold of recordings of them, and more than just -wanting- a copy of the album, but being eager to see it in stores, cause you want your copy. it's loosing a copy, and going out and buying another one cause that's how much you love the music, rather than just waiting and asking your buddy in the band for another copy. Being an Avid fan is being a proactive fan, and showing love no matter what. You don't have to be at -all- the shows, but there's no doubt that this person loves the music cause you see them at a lot of shows. 3. Are there any local bands that you are an avid fan of? Not enough, really. And it's really a factor of laziness. I can tell you some bands that I am really into, and have dug excruciatingly when I heard them live. Bands like 'Rotation' and 'Big Fat Kill'. Bands like 'Ballz Delux' and 'Altered Paradigm'. Really lot's of bands who have GOOD vocals. 4. What are things that keep you from being an avid fan? #1 biggest thing. Attitude. Being a Rock star is fine and dandy. It's how I try to live... but there's a level or respect that I ALWAYS maintain. I've heard of band members shunnign fans cause they arent 'attractive' enough, or they aren't shaped the right way. One of my biggest turn offs happend when I went to see a reigonal act and the singers from the band came up to our table, interacted with EVERYONE but me. The Drummer kind of made a comment about her being... uncomfortable around people of color... Which was devistating to me, cause it was one of my favorite bands at the time. Another thing is redundancy... I don't want to hear the same song with different lyrics and in different arrangements for 12 songs, nor do I wanna hear the same 5 songs for the next 2 years. Sure some songs are classics and will stand the test of time, but WRITE NEW MATERIAL. 5. What reasons (If there are any) would you have for not going to see a local band that you are a fan of? Mainly it has to do with knowing about shows in advance, and the feasibility of getting to them. And secondly cause I've been a little self involved recently, so haven't really been smart enough to realize what I was doing. But I'm going to see a friend's band here Friday night, cause I don't want to be that kind of guy. Hemm... Weird when you analyze yourself. LOL Cix - The Wicked One

One of the coolest aspects of the Detroit Goth/Industrial scenes for me were the cool bands and projects that seemed to float around all the time. I think about bands like 'backspace', 'IEC', 'Rouge Angel 7', 'Chasieum(Sp?)', 'Nightside Eclipse', and countless others, and I remember having a great time at different shows, here and there. But having been decentralized from the culture for so long, I haven't really had the opportunity to experience this much over the past 10 years or so (Oh my god has it been =that= long?). Being a local musician myself, I came onto the boards, and brought my own music and band stuff. I'd love to bring my style of music to you all, and would be ecstatic to see people from the boards at my shows, but this kind of brought to mind some questions about exactly what it takes for a local band to get their claws into the people, and get them to turn out for shows, and events. So the questions at hand: 1. What makes you an avaid fan of a band? 2. What goes into being an avid fan? 3. Are there any local bands that you are an avid fan of? 4. What are things that keep you from being an avid fan? 5. What reasons (If there are any) would you have for not going to see a local band that you are a fan of? I ask these questions hoping to get a good discussion from them. So let’s talk, aye? Don't think of this as me plugging away for Misconceived, it's more a hope of giving all of the local musicians on the board some idea of how to get people interest, and how to hold their interest. How to get people to come out and see shows... things like that. CixWicked

Mudvayne's 'World so cold" "World So Cold" When passion's lost and all the trust is gone, Way too far, for way too long Children crying, cast out and neglected, Only in a world so cold, only in a world This cold Hold the hand of your best friend, look into their eyes Then watch them drift away Some might say, we've done the wrong things, For way too long, for way too long Fever inside the storm, So I'm turning away. Away from the name (Calling your names) Away from the stones (Throw sticks and stones) 'Cause I'm through mending the wounds of us Keep your thorns 'Cause I'm running away, Away from the games (Fucking head games) Away from the space (Hate this head space) The circumstances of a world so cold burning whispers, Remind me of the days, I was left alone, in a world this cold Guilty of the same things, provoked by The cause, I've left alone, in a world so cold Fever inside the storm, So I'm turning away. Away from the name (Calling your names) Away from the stones (Throw sticks and stones) 'Cause I'm through mending the wounds of us Keep your thorns 'Cause I'm running away, Away from the games (Fucking head games) Away from the space (Hate this head space) The circumstances of a world so cold I'm flying, I'm flying away, Away from the names (Calling your names) Away from the games (Fucking head games) The circumstances of a world so cold Why does everyone feel like my enemy, Don't want any part of depression or Darkness, I've had enough sick and tired, bring the sun, or I'm gone, Or I'm gone I'm backing out, I'm no pawn, No mother-fucking slave to this, Never lied Never left Never lived Never loved Never lost Never hurt Never worry about being me, or anyone else Not a care, no concern, don't give a shit about Anything Backing out, giving up, no mother-fucking Slave to this, Never lied Never left Never lived Never loved Never lost Never hurt Never worry about being me, or anyone else Not a care, no concern, don't give a shit about Anything, I need to find a darkened corner, A lightless corner, Where it's safer and calmer, I'm turning away. Away from the name (Calling your names) Away from the stones (Throw sticks and stones) 'Cause I'm through mending the wounds of us I'm running away, Away from the games (Fucking head games) Away from the space (Hate this head space) The circumstances of a world so cold I'm flying, I'm flying away, Away from the names (Calling your names) Away from the games (Fucking head games) The circumstances of a world so cold

See you later!!! Be well.

Manic Depression - James Marshall Hindrix Specifically the verse Well, I think Ill go turn myself off, And go on down All the way down Really aint no use in me hanging around In your kinda scene