Homicidalheathen

I was told I would never carry a child full term after 1 miscarriage and I bore twins a few years later....there is hope.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iv58CU-Ibvo I don't like it. It sounds sampled and electronic and totally cheesy. I wonder if they even had to lay eyes upon each other to record/make this.

Childe Roland To The Dark Tower Came by Robert Browning I. My first thought was, he lied in every word, That hoary cripple, with malicious eye Askance to watch the working of his lie On mine, and mouth scarce able to afford Suppression of the glee, that pursed and scored Its edge, at one more victim gained thereby. II. What else should he be set for, with his staff? What, save to waylay with his lies, ensnare All travellers who might find him posted there, And ask the road? I guessed what skull-like laugh Would break, what crutch 'gin write my epitaph For pastime in the dusty thoroughfare, III. If at his counsel I should turn aside Into that ominous tract which, all agree, Hides the Dark Tower. Yet acquiescingly I did turn as he pointed: neither pride Nor hope rekindling at the end descried, So much as gladness that some end might be. IV. For, what with my whole world-wide wandering, What with my search drawn out thro' years, my hope Dwindled into a ghost not fit to cope With that obstreperous joy success would bring, I hardly tried now to rebuke the spring My heart made, finding failure in its scope. V. As when a sick man very near to death Seems dead indeed, and feels begin and end The tears and takes the farewell of each friend, And hears one bid the other go, draw breath Freelier outside, (``since all is o'er,'' he saith, ``And the blow falIen no grieving can amend;'') VI. While some discuss if near the other graves Be room enough for this, and when a day Suits best for carrying the corpse away, With care about the banners, scarves and staves: And still the man hears all, and only craves He may not shame such tender love and stay. VII. Thus, I had so long suffered in this quest, Heard failure prophesied so oft, been writ So many times among ``The Band''---to wit, The knights who to the Dark Tower's search addressed Their steps---that just to fail as they, seemed best, And all the doubt was now---should I be fit? VIII. So, quiet as despair, I turned from him, That hateful cripple, out of his highway Into the path he pointed. All the day Had been a dreary one at best, and dim Was settling to its close, yet shot one grim Red leer to see the plain catch its estray. IX. For mark! no sooner was I fairly found Pledged to the plain, after a pace or two, Than, pausing to throw backward a last view O'er the safe road, 'twas gone; grey plain all round: Nothing but plain to the horizon's bound. I might go on; nought else remained to do. X. So, on I went. I think I never saw Such starved ignoble nature; nothing throve: For flowers---as well expect a cedar grove! But cockle, spurge, according to their law Might propagate their kind, with none to awe, You'd think; a burr had been a treasure-trove. XI. No! penury, inertness and grimace, In some strange sort, were the land's portion. ``See ``Or shut your eyes,'' said nature peevishly, ``It nothing skills: I cannot help my case: ``'Tis the Last judgment's fire must cure this place, ``Calcine its clods and set my prisoners free.'' XII. If there pushed any ragged thistle-stalk Above its mates, the head was chopped; the bents Were jealous else. What made those holes and rents In the dock's harsh swarth leaves, bruised as to baulk All hope of greenness?'tis a brute must walk Pashing their life out, with a brute's intents. XIII. As for the grass, it grew as scant as hair In leprosy; thin dry blades pricked the mud Which underneath looked kneaded up with blood. One stiff blind horse, his every bone a-stare, Stood stupefied, however he came there: Thrust out past service from the devil's stud! XIV. Alive? he might be dead for aught I know, With that red gaunt and colloped neck a-strain, And shut eyes underneath the rusty mane; Seldom went such grotesqueness with such woe; I never saw a brute I hated so; He must be wicked to deserve such pain. XV. I shut my eyes and turned them on my heart. As a man calls for wine before he fights, I asked one draught of earlier, happier sights, Ere fitly I could hope to play my part. Think first, fight afterwards---the soldier's art: One taste of the old time sets all to rights. XVI. Not it! I fancied Cuthbert's reddening face Beneath its garniture of curly gold, Dear fellow, till I almost felt him fold An arm in mine to fix me to the place, That way he used. Alas, one night's disgrace! Out went my heart's new fire and left it cold. XVII. Giles then, the soul of honour---there he stands Frank as ten years ago when knighted first. What honest man should dare (he said) he durst. Good---but the scene shifts---faugh! what hangman hands Pin to his breast a parchment? His own bands Read it. Poor traitor, spit upon and curst! XVIII. Better this present than a past like that; Back therefore to my darkening path again! No sound, no sight as far as eye could strain. Will the night send a howlet or a bat? I asked: when something on the dismal flat Came to arrest my thoughts and change their train. XIX. A sudden little river crossed my path As unexpected as a serpent comes. No sluggish tide congenial to the glooms; This, as it frothed by, might have been a bath For the fiend's glowing hoof---to see the wrath Of its black eddy bespate with flakes and spumes. XX. So petty yet so spiteful! All along, Low scrubby alders kneeled down over it; Drenched willows flung them headlong in a fit Of route despair, a suicidal throng: The river which had done them all the wrong, Whate'er that was, rolled by, deterred no whit. XXI. Which, while I forded,---good saints, how I feared To set my foot upon a dead man's cheek, Each step, or feel the spear I thrust to seek For hollows, tangled in his hair or beard! ---It may have been a water-rat I speared, But, ugh! it sounded like a baby's shriek. XXII. Glad was I when I reached the other bank. Now for a better country. Vain presage! Who were the strugglers, what war did they wage, Whose savage trample thus could pad the dank Soil to a plash? Toads in a poisoned tank, Or wild cats in a red-hot iron cage--- XXIII. The fight must so have seemed in that fell cirque. What penned them there, with all the plain to choose? No foot-print leading to that horrid mews, None out of it. Mad brewage set to work Their brains, no doubt, like galley-slaves the Turk Pits for his pastime, Christians against Jews. XXIV. And more than that---a furlong on---why, there! What bad use was that engine for, that wheel, Or brake, not wheel---that harrow fit to reel Men's bodies out like silk? with all the air Of Tophet's tool, on earth left unaware, Or brought to sharpen its rusty teeth of steel. XXV. Then came a bit of stubbed ground, once a wood, Next a marsh, it would seem, and now mere earth Desperate and done with; (so a fool finds mirth, Makes a thing and then mars it, till his mood Changes and off he goes!) within a rood--- Bog, clay and rubble, sand and stark black dearth. XXVI. Now blotches rankling, coloured gay and grim, Now patches where some leanness of the soil's Broke into moss or substances like boils; Then came some palsied oak, a cleft in him Like a distorted mouth that splits its rim Gaping at death, and dies while it recoils. XXVII. And just as far as ever from the end! Nought in the distance but the evening, nought To point my footstep further! At the thought, great black bird, Apollyon's bosom-friend, Sailed past, nor beat his wide wing dragon-penned That brushed my cap---perchance the guide I sought. XXVIII. For, looking up, aware I somehow grew, 'Spite of the dusk, the plain had given place All round to mountains---with such name to grace Mere ugly heights and heaps now stolen in view. How thus they had surprised me,---solve it, you! How to get from them was no clearer case. XXIX. Yet half I seemed to recognize some trick Of mischief happened to me, God knows when--- In a bad dream perhaps. Here ended, then, Progress this way. When, in the very nick Of giving up, one time more, came a click As when a trap shuts---you're inside the den! XXX. Burningly it came on me all at once, This was the place! those two hills on the right, Crouched like two bulls locked horn in horn in fight; While to the left, a tall scalped mountain ... Dunce, Dotard, a-dozing at the very nonce, After a life spent training for the sight! XXXI. What in the midst lay but the Tower itself? The round squat turret, blind as the fool's heart, Built of brown stone, without a counter-part In the whole world. The tempest's mocking elf Points to the shipman thus the unseen shelf He strikes on, only when the timbers start. XXXII. Not see? because of night perhaps?---why, day Came back again for that! before it left, The dying sunset kindled through a cleft: The hills, like giants at a hunting, lay, Chin upon hand, to see the game at bay,--- ``Now stab and end the creature---to the heft!'' XXXIII. Not hear? when noise was everywhere! it tolled Increasing like a bell. Names in my ears Of all the lost adventurers my peers,--- How such a one was strong, and such was bold, And such was fortunate, yet, each of old Lost, lost! one moment knelled the woe of years. XXXIV. There they stood, ranged along the hill-sides, met To view the last of me, a living frame For one more picture! in a sheet of flame I saw them and I knew them all. And yet Dauntless the slug-horn to my lips I set, And blew. ``_Childe Roland to the Dark Tower came._'' cause tis so goth ya know

anything by the hoff

Give him one of these with a broke 'off' botton and wait for the men in the white coats to show up and cart him away....hahahaha! Or...make him work on one of these: Its satans Ice cream truck! and have it play only David Hasselhoff's: Do The Limbo DanceLimbo cool, limbo fine Ev`rybody gets a chance Clap your hands it`s party time Do the limbo dance Let`s go on a holiday (Let`s go to Jamaica) Fly in to Montego Bay (Let`s go to Jamaica) Maybe find a hideaway (Let`s go to Jamaica) We can limbo on the sand To a steel drum band Limbo cool, limbo fine Ev`rybody gets a chance Come on and move your body down Do the limbo dance Limbo cool, limbo fine Ev`rybody gets a chance Clap your hands it`s party time Do the limbo dance You will hear the limbo song (When you`re in Jamaica) You`ll be dancin`all night long (When you`re in Jamaica) We can party on and on (When you`re in Jamaica) We can limbo on the sand To a steel drum band Limbo cool, limbo fine Ev`rybody gets a chance Come on and move your body down Do the limbo dance Limbo cool, limbo fine Ev`rybody gets a chance Clap your hands it`s party time Do the limbo dance Fantasies can all come true (Let`s stay in Jamaica) Golden sun will shine on you (Let`s stay in Jamaica) Sleeping under skies of blue (Let`s stay in Jamaica) We can limbo on the sand To a steel drum band Limbo cool, limbo fine Ev`rybody gets a chance Come on and move your body down Do the limbo dance Limbo cool, limbo fine Ev`rybody gets a chance Clap your hands it`s party time Do the limbo dance Limbo cool, limbo fine Ev`rybody gets a chance Come on and move your body down Do the limbo dance Limbo cool, limbo fine Ev`rybody gets a chance Clap your hands it`s party time Do the limbo dance Limbo cool, limbo fine Ev`rybody gets a chance Come on and move your body down Do the limbo dance Limbo cool, limbo fine Ev`rybody gets a chance Clap your hands it`s party time Do the limbo dance Limbo cool, limbo fine Ev`rybody gets a chance Come on and move your body down Do the limbo dance Over and over and over.......

No way. Its actually good? Cause I used to love sci fi on tv but lately it has sucked sooo bad....and new series done of old stuff usually sucks the worst.... Oh god. Now K has some more sci fi to watch *help meeeeee!* Heh.

removing fish flies from the bottom of my shoe

guess...? Yup still comando! I bought the kids undies yesturday and guess what they wanted? Raver rainbow. Ugh with the rainbow already! Aaahhhhh! They are POSSESSED by rainbow bright! *help meeee!*

I am looking for my keys...sort of.

Hugs to both of you. I hope everything turns out ok. And I am glad you got there before the bleeding got worse! This country is so unfair. You get nothing for time off work...medical expenses...and women on average have more problems than men. We need national health care!!!! (Still paying off 1,400 dollars from the last 6 months. It sucks. It is just an ongoing battle with medical expenses.) http://time-blog.com/work_in_progress/2008...re_sick_le.html Those cysts sound painful...hang in there. My sister in law had this and no, they never had kids...my brother was against adoption. He is a selfish ass really. (I don't like the guy) They waited to long, she got sick...and there you go. Have you considered adoption? And yes I have had a total hysterectomy but from gut problems not female problems...I honestly cannot tell the difference. At all. Its nice not buying pads! My guts were stuck to my female parts (when I would lean on things I would bleed and didn't know why)

I am sneaking a peak at K's fathers day gift...one of them...from the soon to be extinct borders...cheap stuff this week! Its a huge glossy of trees ! !!! We love tree's. here is a sample of what its like http://www.the-tree.org.uk/EnchantedForest/wyrd4.htm The "Magnetism" of Trees You may have breathed a sign of relief to read that scientists have reported recently that the ozone hole has become a tiny bit smaller in recent years. But there is no peace for the wicked! The magnetosphere is our only effective protective shield against hard particle radiation from the Sun and the cosmos. And now it seems clear that the strength of this magnetic field has been decreasing in parallel with global deforestation! Humanity started taking measurements in 1838 and the intensity of our planet's magnetic field has dropped 10% since then. Find out why hugging trees makes sense! The influence of Forests on the Earth's magnetic field I read about this and other facts in Fred Hageneder's excellent book "The Spirit of Trees - science, symbiosis and inspiration" (Floris books, 2000) in his chapter on "Trees, electricity and magnetism." Electricity and magnetism is an extremely complicated and far-reaching subject. We use these forces every day in all sorts of gadgets, machinery and transport. But even before that was the case, electricity and magnetism were vital forces in the physiology of our own bodies, as they are in all living beings, including plants. I do not possess the technical know-how to write competently on this topic, but I shall attempt to give you a basic idea of the issues involved with the help of quotes from Hageneder's book, because I feel they need to be brought to the attention of a much wider public. "Electrical events occur everywhere because the electrical charge is incorporated in atoms and is thereby responsible for most of the physical and chemical properties of all atoms and molecules. The physical bodies of trees like those of humans are electromagnetic phenomena." (Hageneder) "The electromagnetic fields of huge forests affect the outer core of the Earth, which has a very high electrical conductibility. Through the tidal drag of the Earth's crust the core spins somewhat faster. The electromagnetic influence of the forests is conducted through magnetic fields in the core where it induces electrical currents, thus in turn creating magnetic fields. In this way the vegetation has a charging effect on the Earth's magnetic fields. This becomes evident by the correlation between the density of vegetation and the declination of the Earth's magnetic field. The declination, or deviation between the magnetic pole and the rotation pole, should theoretically be a simple, mathematically calculable figure. But in reality it is very different from that. What is noticeable is that in the great forests of the earth, the deviation is zero, the compass needle pointing to the true north." (Rainer Fisher, 1994, translated by Fred Hageneder). Theory (above) and reality (below) of the declination in the Earth's magnetic field (Figure 10 from "The Spirit of the Trees, science, symbiosis and inspiration") For a long time there was no satisfactory scientific explanation of how it was possible that these electrical currents were set in motion, but the German magnetic field research scientist Rainer Fisher noted that the simplest reason: the effect of countless parallel vegetable electrical conductors had been completely overlooked. The surface of the Earth has a negative electrical charge and the ionosphere has a positive charge (although this is reversed during a thunderstorm). Thus plants and trees "continually discharge to the air electrical tension voltage between the earth and the ionosphere", because of their sap flow. "Previous theories of Earth's self-maintaining field contain central contradictions. A simple law of physics states that every magnet has its highest intensity at its poles and its lowest at its equator, but this is not the case with Earth." (Hageneder) In Antarctica's South Pole, where there is virtually no vegetation the law holds true, but not for the North Pole or the Equator. The highest intensity in the North hemisphere is found in two points: One above the last extensive forest areas of Canada (2.500 km south of the magnetic pole) and one above the huge forest of Siberia. The lowest intensity of the magnetic field should be found at the Equator. But this is not the case above the tropical rain forests, but instead "at a latitude of 35° South, where most continents and their vegetation end." This means that significant deforestation and clear-felling practices contribute to the decline of The Earth's magnetic field. This magnetic field and the magnetosphere create our only effective protective shield against hard particle radiation from the Sun an the cosmos. There are probably also many other functions which the Earth's magnetic field fulfills. Another interesting observation made by Hageneder is that above the poles there are deep gorges in the magnetic field where the greatest amount of cosmic radiation enters, some of which is visible as the northern lights. Tree health and electricity + diagnosing and treating a tree with a car battery Hageneder also draws attention to scientific research done in the field of the connection between electricity and the vitality of trees. The bio-electrical field of trees have daily and annual rhythms and react sensitively to physiological activity, changes of light and darkness, the airs' electricity, the Earth's magnetic field, the phases of the moon and the eleven year solar cycle. Within the framework of these 'external' influences, each tree species and subspecies has its own characteristic 'electro-dynamic force field pattern'. "An extensive series of field studies between 1969 and 1990, by the Czech scientist, Vladimir Rajda, revealed that the measurement of trees' geo-phyto-electrical currents (GPEC) made it possible to determine the health of trees with great precision. This is because electrical currents reflect the biochemical metabolism of the tree so closely that the two phenomena can be understood as a biophysical unity." (Hageneder) Twenty years of research and measuring the electrical currents in phloem and cambium layers of various tree species led Rajda to the conclusion that plants are capable of auto-regulating their electrical currents, partly because each tree species shows individual characteristics and the source of the electrical currents within the tree seems to be the living being itself. "The electrical currents form an energetic bridge between the inorganic nutrients of the soil and living plants. The optimum supply ensures perfect health, resistance and growth. A damaged tree, on the other hand, reveals a significant decrease in the intensity of electrical current before any visual signs of illness appear. This is then followed by a decrease in water uptake and nutrient supply. The electrical currents decrease further, while the electrical resistance of the tree increases enormously. The balanced distribution of plant nutrients collapses. For example, in Oak, there is a deficiency of magnesium, potassium, nitrogen, calcium, copper, zinc and phosphorus, while manganese can be found in excess. Following a period of undernourishment the tree is too weak to keep parasites at bay. Rajda actually managed to heal plants with medium damage by raising their electrical currents back to normal levels - with the help of car batteries! However, exact control is necessary, as exceeding the natural value of a species (as reached in high summer) will directly damage or destroy plant organs." (Hageneder) Hageneder notes that in this context tree hugging no longer seems so ridiculous. We are living beings with an 'electrical charge' too. When we hug a tree a real energy exchange is in fact unavoidable. In embracing it, we are only a matter of millimeters of centimeters away from the electrically active layers of xylem and phloem in the tree. Electrical charge affect photosynthesis Other interesting physiological plant research was done in the Soviet Union in the mid 1970's. It was always thought that photosynthesis (the manufacturing of food by plants from water and carbon dioxide, taken from the air, powered by sunlight) was dependent on four things: light, temperature, moisture and nutrition. The Soviet research showed that there was a fifth factor, which is the electrical charge of the air. Remember that the surface of the Earth has a negative electrical charge and the ionosphere has a positive charge, as noted above: "The Russian surveys showed that the photosynthesis of plants is stimulated by an increasing negative charge of the soil, but slows down with the charge inversion present during thunderstorms. (Storm clouds have a strong negative charge on their lower side, which forces the Earth below to take on a positive charge.) (Hageneder) Source: Fred Hageneder "The Spirit of Trees - science, symbiosis and inspiration" (Floris books, 2000)

a whopping 83 bucks last week, me needs to find better job. Other than that laughing my ass off at comedic thing 2 gonna miss her soon : (

before: After: any questions??

..fighting a longstanding losing battle and still losing... damn weeds

ha ha redneck raver. http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Camo-Couture-Fluffie...oQQcmdZViewItem I was right though my evil offspring love the skirts and leg warmers...I am afraid...