Raev

I love it!

Welcome! I <3 newbies!

Am I going to hell because I laughed at that?

Well, I can't claim to be punk because I am not - I can say that this rivet head full time dad does well.

welcome

allo!

Welcome aboard!

welcome!

Welcome!

Original article here. This fall, an exciting documentary is hitting movie theaters. It's called The Other F Word, and it's about punk rock; it's about family; and it's about a plethora of life's awkward questions including: "Should I have tattooed my forehead?" and "Daddy, what's a dominatrix?" It features NOFX's Fat Mike, Jim Lindberg from Pennywise, TSOL's Jack Grisham, Rancid's Lars Frederiksen, Rise Against's Tim McIlrath and a host of others, and was produced by Morgan Spurlock (y'know, the Supersize Me guy). You can see the trailer for it here. It's noted in the trailer that "There's nothing in the punk rock ethos that prepares you for being a dad." But, actually, we'd like to respectfully disagree. Because we think that a life spent submerged in punk rock is the best training any human could hope for when it comes to raising a child. As anyone who has ever lived in a punk house, or squatted, will tell you, you will never find a more practical human being on earth than a punk -- they're good at eating on a budget, they're good at making clothes last three times longer than they should, and, by God, they can fix anything and everything, often using only regular household objects and a bit of creativity (think of them as stinkier MacGyvers). Just imagine what these people are capable of once their band has been successful and they've got some money in their pockets! ​ On his last spoken word tour through San Francisco earlier this year, Henry Rollins very wisely noted that punks make the best parents because they raise kids to think outside the box, to question everything they're told, to understand the impact of politics on their lives, and, above all, to be open-minded. The children of punks -- even if they go on to have no interest in the genre/ lifestyle whatsoever -- are unlikely to beat up another kid at school for being weird, and they are probably less likely to discriminate against others. What's more, kids of punk rockers aren't going to get beaten up or bullied in school, either. Think about it: would you mess with a kid who had Lars Frederiksen for a dad? Oh, hell no! We saw him in the produce section of Safeway on Market Street once, and, trust us, when he's placed in an entirely bland, suburban setting, he looks kinda scary. (Yes, Lars, it is the forehead tattoo.) Imagine him in a PTA meeting! ​ In addition, punk rock parents, without a doubt, have all witnessed some crazy shit. They didn't go from suburban homes to fancy colleges to office jobs and then back to suburbia. These people may end up in the suburbs sometimes, sure, but they've probably earned a bit of peace and quiet. Drugs, violence, death, lunacy, chaos ... it's all been-there-done-that for the seasoned punk rocker. So think of the wealth of advice they have to pass onto their offspring! So much more than responsible folk who've never done drugs, or gone to the bad part of town, or been in a fight, or woken up with a tattoo they don't remember getting. These are not parents who can sugarcoat the answers they give to their children's questions -- or avoid them -- because their experiences are literally written all over them. If all parents were punks, the world might be a more tolerant, honest and wise place. Kids would probably rebel less (there'd be nothing to rebel against), and if fatherhood can prompt sobriety and sobbing from Flea (you think he's boring now, but watch Suburbia ... it's an improvement), think of the transformative powers reproduction can sometimes prompt in otherwise lost souls. ​ At one time or another, we've interviewed most of the people featured in this documentary, and, for the record, there ain't a stupid one in the bunch (even when they try and pretend that's the case for the sake of public amusement). So we're excited to see this movie, and and we might just pick up some valuable parenting skills from it, too.

!!!!! What it says, if you can't read it in the image is - "Whip me bite me eat me tease me"

I know I haven't been on DGN much lately nor have I been at any events (and was barely seen at Renfest). This old moderator isn't abandoning the lovely DGNers. I'm just insanely overworked right now and have nothing left in the fuel tank. Stay mischievous my lovelies, give me some stories to read when I get back to a normal schedule!

About what?

League of Legends when time and opportunity permit.

Jeebus dude!

It's true. There very well might be. I'll know for sure in 2-3 hours, myself.

Reports?

I'll be making an appearance.

Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

That will work!

Riiiiise from your grave...

This isn't mine. It came from here. You hear it all the time: "He was such a NICE Guy, and she's such a Heartless Bitch for dumping him." I get letters from self-professed Nice Guys, complaining that women must WANT to be treated like shit, because THEY, the "Nice Guy" have failed repeatedly in relationships. This is akin to the false logic that "Whales are mammals. Whales live in the sea. Therefore, all mammals live in the sea." If you have one bad relationship after another, the only common denominator is YOU. Think about it. What's wrong with Nice Guys? The biggest problem is that most Nice Guys are hideously insecure. They are so anxious to be liked and loved that they do things for other people to gain acceptance and attention, rather than for the simply pleasure of giving. You never know if a Nice Guy really likes you for who you are, or if he has glommed onto you out of desperation because you actually paid some kind of attention to him. Nice Guys exude insecurity -- a big red target for the predators of the world. There are women out there who are "users" -- just looking for a sucker to take advantage of. Users home-in on "Nice Guys", stroke their egos, take them for a ride, add a notch to their belts, and move on. It's no wonder so many Nice Guys complain about women being horrible, when the so often the kind of woman that gets attracted to them is the lowest form of life... Self-confident, caring, decent-hearted women find "Nice Guys" to be too clingy, self-abasing, and insecure. Nice Guys go overboard. They bring roses to a "lets get together for coffee" date. They try to buy her affections with presents and fancy things. They think they know about romance, but their timing is all wrong, and they either come-on too strong, too hard and too fast, OR, they are so shy and unassertive, that they hang around pretending to be "friends", in the hope that somehow, someway, they will get the courage up to ask her out for a "date". They are so desperate to please that they put aside their own needs, and place the object of their desire on a pedestal. Instead of appreciating her, they worship her. We are only human, and pedestals are narrow, confining places to be -- not to mention the fact that we tend to fall off of them. They cling to her, and want to be "one" with her for fear that if she is out of sight, she may disappear or become attracted to someone else. A Nice Guy often has trouble with emotional intimacy, because he believes that if she learns about the REAL person inside, she will no longer love him. Nice Guys are always asking HER to make the decisions. They think it's being equitable, but it puts an unfair burden of responsibility on her, and gives him the opportunity to blame her if the decision was an unwise one. Nice Guys rarely speak up when something bothers them, and rarely state clearly what it is they want, need and expect. They fear that any kind of conflict might spell the end of the relationship. Instead of comprimising and negotiating, they repeatedly "give in". When she doesn't appreciate their sacrifice, they will complain that, "Everything I did, I did for her.", as if this somehow elevates them to the status of martyrs. A woman doesn't want a martyr. She wants an equal, caring, adult partner. Nice Guys think that they will never meet anyone as special as she is. They use their adoration as a foundation for claiming that "no one will ever love her as much as I do." Instead of being a profound statement of their devotion, this is a subtle, but nasty insult. It is akin to saying to her: "You are a difficult person, and only *I* can ever truly love you, so be thankful I'm here." The nice guy -needs- to believe that he is the best person for the object of his desires, because otherwise his insecurities will overrun him with jealousies and fear. The truth of the matter is that there are many people out there who can be a good match for her. We rarely stop loving people we truly care about. Even if we no longer continue the relationship, the feelings will continue... But love isn't mutually exclusive. We can (and do) love many people in our lives, and romantic love is really no different. Though he may love her immensely, there will likely be other people who have loved her just as much in her past, and will love her just as much in the future. The irony of it all is: "Who would want to go out with someone who was inherintly unlovable anyways?" More than loving the woman in his life, a Nice Guy NEEDS her. "She is my Life, my only source of happiness..." YECH! What kind of a burden is that to place on her? That SHE has to be responsible for YOUR happiness? Get a grip! Another mistake Nice Guys make is to go after "hard luck" cases. They deliberately pick women with neuroses, problems, and personality disorders, because Nice Guys are "helpers". A Nice Guy thinks that by "helping" this woman, it will make him a better, more lovable person. He thinks it will give him a sense of accomplishment, and that she will appreciate and love him more, for all his efforts and sacrifice. He is usually disappointed by the results. This ultimately boils down to the fact that Nice Guys don't like themselves. Is it any wonder women don't like them? In order to truly love someone else, you must first love yourself. Too often Nice Guys mistake obsession for "love". Get this Guys: INSECURITY ISN'T SEXY. IT'S A TURNOFF. You don't have to be an ego-inflated, arrogant jerk. You just have to LIKE yourself. You have to know what you want out of life, and go after it. Only then will you be attractive to the kind of woman with whom a long-term relationship is possible.

If he wants to draw that conclusion, shouldn't he make a national Catholic Priest registry?

I really don't see what the benefit to such a registry would be. I don't need to know nor do I want to know the religious beliefs or lack thereof when it comes to my neighbors. I have mine. They have theirs. I'm perfectly happy with neither side having a word to say to each other about it.