kat

likes us Southwest Detroit girls.

is baffled by how he managed to survive driving through Southwest Detroit all those nights on his way to City Club.

was a chump in high school.

it's time for your nap. Would you like a blankie?

wants spongebob to be banned but will not succeed in this quest.

no you should not. where can I find this Walrus you speak of?

Will not watch the news without a box of Kleenex.

just one. Now how cold was that Eskimo's sphincter?

dresses like Dolly Parton and sings showtunes while yelling at the cat for licking itself.

wants to see what it's like to taste the rainbow.

wants to dance on top of a soon to erupt volcano.

Right. A law student and had a Master's degree in like psychology. Look at the recent Craigslist killer.

I am not sure. How cold is an eskimo's sphincter?

Used to shop at Hot Topic.

never shops.

Holy.

Because they secretly make them happy and too much happiness scares the shit out of people. Why is happiness such a scary feeling?

was the intended target.

How come in these ad's, specifically in personal ads people always state the fact that they are attractive? The first thing he says is "I am an attractive male". Pretty soon people are gonna start putting that on their resume.

Forgot to take his meds and is now hallucinating little pasta people.

shit.

yes smells.

Here is what I interpret it as. I am a big loser with a small penis who was asked to post this ad for my parents apartment that they own. I am looking for a girl to rent this place but if you just look like a female that is also fine. I just want someone who is actually gonna open the door when I come collect my rent. I want you to weigh no more then 118 lbs because that is what I weigh and I am afraid if you weigh more then me I will get beat up when I come to collect the rent. I hope we have chemistry if we do I won't even charge you to live there. If you have no job it is okay we can work out a deal on the rent.