Time for me to chime in I think, with my gospel of the one true goth definition. If you don't like it I will totally go jihad on your ass. Troy said it best I think in the original post. Just because we don't like something doesn't mean it isn't goth. It's also been stated more than once that most of the best goth bands and their marketing teams have stayed FAR away from the goth label for the obvious reasons that if they accept us the rest of society will shun them (even though they pretty much already do).
It's not goth or not goth/black and white/easily definable. What it is are shades of gray and obfuscation. By my definition EVERYTHING IS GOTH! it's just a matter of to what degree...
Being gothic to me is having an appreciation for the darker things in life. If you can appreciate the beauty in wilted flowers you can understand what goth is. It's not completely about depression and usually tends to be quite the opposite. It's getting JOY from things that would normally depress most people.
This all pretty much spouted off from the "video" thread, which I backed out of because I think everyone posting videos in it are completely wrong just by the nature of the title since it goes against the new definition of the word.
Technically (if you want to be a super elitist snob) it was born from 1970's punk and most people call it either post-punk or deathrock now (different genres with similar roots) because everyone shat over the original definition and things got really confusing, then Manson became known as "goth" and none of them wanted to be associated with that douchebag so Manson actually has done way more harm than good for the scene (even if I do like SOME of his music/lyrics and ideals).
It spans all genres including EBM/synthpop/industrial/emo/IDM/etc... and all styles of fashion including steampunk (edwardian)/cyber/victorian/punk/etc... has origins from around the world, and spans all religions including Catholicism, Judaism, Paganism, Buddhism, and even Atheism (which isn't a religion). Basically the only requirement in media and art for something to be gothic is for it to be really really dark in nature.
I submit that you can't measure what it is or is not but only the degree of how much it is. Why people don't get this I don't know because it seems retardedly simple and logical to me.
It's like the debate of if Pluto is a planet or not. First you have to define what makes a planet. Maybe compared to Jupiter we're not a planet since it's size is much much larger than all the rest. Is it a mass of matter that orbits the sun in a somewhat circular pattern that is larger than a small moon? Yes? Fuck it it's a planet then. (ok stupid analogy but if someone can figure out or see where I was going with it by all means take it over and finish the thought, my brain is fried right now).