by torn asunder on Apr 21 (bookmark) (print) (next)
Author's Last Login: 3 days ago
In Category: Other, Personal. 3 total.
you just don't get it, do you?
the things you chase after,
the things you desire,
will leave you empty, wanting,
yearning for more.
and what do you want, deep down?
happiness, contentment, love...
and where will you look?
and how will you find them,
when you don't know
what to look for?
you just don't get it, do you?
you can't look outside yourself
for things that aren't within.
and until you learn this lesson
these things will escape you.
you want happiness?
choose to be happy.
you want contentment?
accept your current life.
you want love?
give yourself the love you desire.
when you can do just this,
you will know happiness,
you will find contentment,
you will have the love you seek,
and it will be yours, forever.
you just don't get it, do you?
apparently, neither do i
The Cure-Closedown
---from Disintegration
I'm running out of time i'm out of step and
closing down and never sleep for wanting hours
the empty hours of greed and uselessly always
the need to feel again the real belief of
something more than mockery if only i could
fill my heart with love
I used to listen to this song ALL the time when I felt the way you do.
I agree with Game of Chance probably the most. The best way to work through loneliness is to keep busy, and really get into something you love. The worst thing is to wallow too much (Youre not wallowing here, just searching for answers which is half the battle)
Wallowing can be oddly comforting, like taking and old old blanket and wrapping it around your heart so it feels safe and warm. But then the pain remains.
Sex-Ill be honest, I cant really feel Dollar Dave.
Youre an good-looking guy and you run this whole site which is extremely attractive to people. So, Id imagine sex is not a problem for you. Besides the fact, if I remember, you said you dont like one-night stands. Sex is great, but the day after empty sex for someone with an open heart is so painful I find. You connected with someone and then theyre gone, just like the rest.
Don't over analyze or over philosophize.
(Full disclaimer: I'm an existentialist and romantic and have no use for post modernist posturing)
You're hurt. It's excrutiating. Own it. Don't apologize for it. Don't hide it. Those that do are the macho pricks that get wasted every day, beat their wives and dont know why.
Its amazing for someone in your position to be so naked here. Let that empower you.
Take Game's advice.
Lean on your friends a little more.
You dont have to carry everyone elses problem on your shoulders all the time. You can take a moment to think of you and not feel SO DAMN GUILTY about it.
You are a fantastic guy. I know this not from knowing you, because it would take far too long for that, but by a much better measure, from looking at the way all of your friends talk of you.
She'll come along. You're far too worthy for her to stay away much longer
MY .02