WhiteLines

Ohhhihk I'm up. I feel numb and pain pain my legs sting. Pain WTF. They burn. Kneecaps not wanna be bendy for me. Just terrible idea. Solitude got too solitary and I needed a coping mechanism that aint got th same name as I do so i gone out on walkabout from like 4:00AM all the way to 2:00pm and found some freakin fantastic terrain to traverse. Acres of dumped stone and concrete, a way bigger water tower, and one giant tractor hidden in the darkness. Fun $h¡† but did not mechanically rest up any of my parts much.

Holy crap, my body and brains are giving out on me, I'm not sure i can make it back to the hotel before passing out or weirder. But i found a freakin cool old school gangsta OG hood ass lookin t-shirt. Buy myself somethin nice for my wifes birthday. Dont woory, I'm not "that guy" i alrady bought things for her and mailed them. Now gotta make it to the room without goin into convulsions, err... any more than i already am

Wowza. My half sister kept a trailer in such disarray too all her life. My home tho, has never, ever had even a quare foot of space looking like it does now. Its a tragedy.

Yeah Im out now, only I know who Im dealing with so I'm going to have yo progress slow and strategically. If she catches the jist that divorce is coming then she'll be on the attack and i will have lost the upper hand. Im going to have to do my homework, and proper preparation. Luckily I have been documenting the condition of the house since X-mas, unfortunately its the only house I got left and she's made it inhabitable now. We were some of the first people to get evicted during the corona quarantine before the gov't halted evictions. So the house that she has destroyed now is my family home I was raised in

Its 5 o'clock. Do you know where your children are? Lol does anybody remember those public service announcements or whatever LOL. Well one day my kids will be old enough to drink and drive, uhhh.... Like when I'm in my 60's

Waking up in pain but still feelin' stoned, man if i had a nickel for every time ha ha. LOL

I cant have a drivers license because while i was away at work as foreman on an Ulta project years back, she took my Impala that I said was unsafe to drive unless in an absolute emergency. Well oldest missed the bus and instead of asking my maw for a ride cuz she was there too, my wife (never had a license in her life) and (broke down car, we're not paying to keep insurance on it. ) She mighta made it a mile and smashed it into some ladys car who was stopped in the road, then leaves the scene. I wont get my license back unless i pay her $10,000 lawsuit off in full all at once 😂🧐🤬 The only way there was ever a dog was she went and got a stupid mut husky pup without asking me. It was short lived since she has taught the girls to be as lazy as her. No one could take care of the dang dog 🙄🤯

Yeah thanks because there's those of us who really committed to the whole family unit thing, except their co-pilot only can speak in nothing but lies and will blame anything and everyone else for every single thing that remotely seems like it would portray herself in a bad light until, huh? Whats that? I've pierced straight thru the veil of reality. Now i gotta ask someone else discreetly cuz although i still feel like i know the right answer, I have too much doubt inside me. Hey whataya think a that un. Ol lady done left me a' drownin' in a sea of debt and doubt, No I'm left high and dry, loggin' on DGN to pout . (Thass mah country song lyrics, gonna go git on that there Grande Ol Opry show)

Hell, I wub you both. And here I thought I had forgotten wut wub wuz. Weird. Lol

Last thought, is it just weirder than all get out that I uncovered the detonator switch to marraige's self destruct right after Bossman's marraige had suffered it's totally unrelated death throws, and also just one hour before having to be picked up for work and then shocked with the surprise revelation that Bossman was now living a new happier life in another relationship. Is the universe freakin weird or whaaat? WTF?!

No not you lmao, God. I was gonna add that in there, reckon i should've lol. It's a lyric in an FJ Outlaw song that was playing right when I finished writing the previous big wall of drama spam

That was stressful typing idek if anything's spelt right toward the end i was bangin' fingertips down like i wanted the phone to die, then it almost did. It crashed and was froze for about 3 minutes. My crazy discord friend Straaya said that months ago. I found her server and returned to DGN bout same time but Ive tried to be respectful of DGN and not make it my drama dumpsite. Straaya's server was a lawless land within discord tho and mostly was only 3 or 4 of us poppin up on there so she became my innermost circle, we had each others back and gave support, advice, and positive mojo out. Ive even shown the screenshots of conversations with my wife showing how unreasonably volatile her responses to anything and everything can be. I had cut all my ties in the world years back i lived only at work or at home in self imposed prison with my wife and kids and the mountains of filth they create whenever I'd be out of town. And you just dont discuss these things at work, we arent people here. We are machines. Now with Straaya gone, Kat, you and TronRP have found yourselves seated at the head of my street family. I'm sure i am about to be flying blind thru a toxic divorce with high stakes and I'll need trustworthy objective consults along the way. I have to do everything in my power for Lilith, and Levi even if he may not be mine. There nothing legal to prove tha. O xannot allow my children to be raised by someone this dangerous and unstable. Im breaking my oath, i swore i wouldnt write no more of this subject, like at 5:00pm or somethin omg.

Wear a tighter shirt to hold em in place idk?

My gaawd, why'd you make my brain so sick?

Thanks but I have had the equivalent of 10 brains processing power crunching variables and tangents on the matter of solving, fixing, repairing, saving this thing over the last uhhh years... Ever since 2016. I broke my own values for her demands, I swore never to marry and above all i swore not to propagate the genes of my psychotic bloodline or punish any soul by bringing a life into this wicked world. On 5-27-2016 my firstborn Lilith Kay White entered the world. The following years worsened much more and I revised my purpose from things I had learned, my final line in the sand was to not to pass on generational abuse. I have made hard enough efforts at times that it should've saved 3 marriages and still cant get her to alter any aspect of her behavior, not even look inward and contemplate if her actions are doing harm, definitely not admit anything. Its always blamed on the most illogical far fetched bullcrap. Anyway lemme shorten this up. 12-02-2020 a son was born now, an awfully blond son who she really really wanted to name after me. (Fast forward to now, the general area of time that the "Ah-ha" evidence is dated from is near the time of this surprise unexpected pregnancy, we didnt want more kids) but wait, heres the crazy $h¡† Kat, the moment Levi was born all things changed, took a hard turn towards way bad. I immediately felt nothing towards Levi and couldnt understand why, she had brought unwanted attention upon our home. I fixed the home problem but she goes on to have bad bad postpartum depression, so did i perhaps, most that year she wouldnt communicate, we lost any sense of intimacy between us i recommitted my effort to do the work to save a marraige, we both start at something like a marraige counseling app we got she slowly looses interest and quits then im the only one continuing to work and learn, then i give up. And I've been pushed into a lot of workaholism and hard drugs because of her but i have never been tempted, i have never cheated, my mamma raised me good like that but now i no longer care. Im using her logic with me in 2014, she "didnt want to breakr vows" then found out good enuff evidence her husband was unfaithful so she was then free to lay with me. Maybe yesterdays values are no longer applicable in this world idk. But i learned and grew a great deal thru this, i still believe it all was meant to be. I doubt I'll end up "revenge cheatin" on her somehow, since i have no experience randomly hookin up or dating. Ive moved from long tern directly to long term directly to lobg term relationships. But my values and perspective have drastically changed this week. I dont care what color the grass is or i i end up on a desert island, my kids have been raised so totally wrong and are in a dangerous situation i cannot express publicly. Youd have to hit me up in a message or something for the fill in the blank info there. But i could make a call now and have my own kids taken away tomorrow. I gotta stop this typin now. Thanks fo lettin' me vent yo!

I'm about to stop drawing myself in to rantin and ravin' about how dumb and upset and crappy all this is. This is my one night off work and damnit I intend to have myself some kind of a good time. I will type no freakin further page long diatribes about my nemesis the Hillbilly Whore of Backwoods Babylon.

We could write a whole ass book of hymns partner!

Much respect and the hugz right back at you. Its mind freakin' boggling. I'm a highly intelligent person and skilled with crisis management, diplomacy, communicating, uhhh logic. And on the other hand, she did not graduate HS or get a GED, and in her younger years she had just enough IQ to be above the line of mental retardation, yet I've never met someone so skilled at at carjacking conversations and fights, it's as if some unholy entity controlling the strings. And is also an expert at creating enough chaos to keep me from ever adding all the figures up at once and all I want is peace quiet and everyone to be happy, so eventually Id let $h¡† fly just to avoid any confrontations. Muddahfawka' i feel like the dumbest sunovabeech realizing each of my relationships ended with me being betrayed in the worst of ways and this one here potentially has become my greatest towering monument to being betrayed but at least i know what to tattoo all over my back now... Knives.

Oh I was meaning to get back to this post so i could reply to ya lol. I am most greatful for your concerns, but there is no need to be troubled. I think i use straightforward enough metaphors and innuendos for y'all to know I am a true outlaw, and I do dabble into dancing with death. However, we are trained professionals so please do not attempt any of this on your own. And yessirree Dr.Tron I believe you understood what contraband item i was referring to. Im not a fan, and really never took it in my life despite being very involved in the 90's 00's pain pill epidemic. But a year after being with my now soon to be ex wife, I was foreman running a 2 month remodel in Seattle and couldnt get my suboxone sent there so i made due with the local market's offerings. Also during this time of my relationship is when her "love bombing"stage began to end and all the crazy came out 1000% narcissist. So I dived very far into the rabbit hole to protect myself. So much uppers and downers together, it was a speedball buffet, my body didn't know whether to get up and run around in circles or to fall over and go into a coma lmao. For future reference, just think of me kinda like the Hunter S. Thompson of carpentry and commercial construction. Boo-Yaw, peace out ✌️

Yeeeeeah I'm discovering that to be painstakingly true this past week since I saw every red flag from the beginning, noted every suspicious thing that didn't quite add up, listened to every poorly crafted unintelligent lie, witness the telltale behaviour, and knew what all of it really meant from the experiences of my last two lives but I never jumped off the bandwagon, I just sat in the back and whispered the biggest lies I'd ever heard before to myself over and over again. LMFAO weeeeeeeee! I suppose it's all a part of a grander design with a more important purpose.

Lyrics in a Burden song that features Kevin Gates on it also... They think I'm paranoid, maybe I'm paranoid. Lol

Awful, horrible. Broken temporal bone may be more severe than i hoped. Got back to hotel around 4, took a shower, then catastrophic brain crash sleep suddenly awakening around daylight standing at the hotel window holding a chair up above my head up to the ceiling and trying to push it thru the curtains. Was like WTF?! passed back out. Awoke at 8, tried to get dressed to go out for a cig, return to blackness. Woke up on opposite side of room 15 mins passed checkout time with DopeMan and DopeStar pounding on my door, a phone ringing that I couldn't locate, and not one thing of mine remotely packed into a suitcase. I think I fell a lot more times, cuz i hurt way worse than i did. And no, these are not normal type of events lol

Dang holy smokes that was one good burn! Yes I should have, and did in fact know better. I'm sure the surface on the drama has only just now been scratched tho. LOL I'm just being over the top sarcastic as an inside joke to myself since what your posted fits my life so well at the moment.

There's truely no better way to act at all than actin' a fool yo! High five!

Woah, yeah that'd be brilliant. I didn't know wtf Discord was until recently. It's fine as a frog hair split three ways and sanded. Heck I think I'm a moderator on someones server still.