torn asunder

you requested "searching for a girl with my good eye closed" by soundgarden!?

feeling contradicting things towards myself... good, that i've lost almost 8 lbs since i lost my job. bad, that i can't start the outplacement thing until jan. 11th. sad, because i'm still feeling isolated, but i can't go anywhere for more than an overnight, which makes it hard to visit people. guilty, because i haven't done more than run a few times, and i need to start lifting again. pitiful, because all i seem to do anymore is sit on this computer & wait for people to post here, or email me, neither of which seems to be very often. envious of people who have someone that cares about them, beyond family. hopeful that i might make it to the east side for NYE, if i can find a party/someone to crash with. angst about the thought of being here alone for NYE, and having to spend x-mas with my family, as they don't know i'm not working anymore & i don't want to slip up & tell them. oh, and a bit pleased that i've not had a drink since the night i lost the job.

i think someone posted this on dgn quite a while back... wait - is it just me, or does that guy remind anyone of fez from that '70s show!?

the problem with asking someone not to smoke around you at a bar is that, even if 9 times out of 10 people are respectful about it, all it takes is you asking the wrong person on the wrong night, and you could end up in a physical confrontation over it, especially in a bar (i've had it happen). besides, as things stand currently, i, as a non-smoker, have no right to ask you not to smoke, if i'm in a smoking area. if i want to avoid smoke, i have to go to a non-smoking section if they have one. if they don't, i'm SOL. i don't have any more rights than a smoker does, so i won't ask.

*personally*, i think a lot of things should be banned in public places, like smoking and drinking, for example. of course, i also think that what one does in the privacy of one's own home is one's own business, and that included many of the currently illegal drugs they've "declared war" on. you wanna do crack? fine, do it in your house! you wanna drive after doing crack (while still under the influence), go to jail, big fine, because then you're endangering others. wanna smoke pot, drink, shoot heroin, snort coke? fine, do it in your house! ('your', meaning any private residence, not necessarily one you own.) wanna go out in public after doing any of those? fine, as long as you're not endangering others in doing so. if you do something that endangers others? big fine, go to jail. that's what i *personally* think. of course, everyone knows we tried prohibition once before, and look how well that worked. if enough smokers and smokers' rights advocates get active enough, maybe they can change it. if they can, fine, i'll live with it. doesn't mean i'll be happy, but i will. honestly, i'd like to see exemptions for smokers' clubs, certain bars/clubs/etc, (and especially your own car/house, i mean, wtf!?) but as far as i'm concerned, if a place has employees, i think this ban is fine. if you want to work there and don't smoke, you have to sign a waiver, or something. afterall, it's a workplace, and there are rules covering unhealthy work environments for every other industry, why not this one? i also agree that it should be arranged like the licensing for liquor, so you can buy the ability to allow it, but i think that should be tied with requirements for proper air filtration, etc. that would be covered by health inspectors of some sort, and if you fail, you get your smokers' license revoked. not that anyone cares about my opinion, but there it is.

tell "bubu" we all said hi!!

not stupid at all, just apparently choosing to gloss over/ignore the points i was making, which i did in several posts, the biggest of which is that smokers have no right to force others to breathe their toxic chemicals (captive audience/workforce). to make an absurd comparison, the next time someone blows smoke in my face, i have every right to swing my fist. if they "choose" to not get out of the way, it's their choice to be hit, right? i mean, they could just move away from me, right? it's their choice to stand there while i'm flailing my arms around, right?

ok, f**k it, no way i'm going to change anyone's mind; i officially give up...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I6O9P8nr870

i've deleted three posts in this thread, the three people involved will know who they are. if you have personal issues between you, please take it to PMs, don't drag personal drama onto the board. thanks!

so, for all of you people wanting more freedom, how would you feel if we removed the ban on asbestos insulation? let the builders decide if they want to use it, who cares if it causes mesothelioma or other cancers? i mean, who is the government to tell a builder how to build? and melamine in baby formula? hell, let's allow that too... there's a reason the govt. does some things. do you know what all is *in* cigarette smoke? (taken from a different website)

getting ready for some dinner, cooling down after another 2-mile run.

i *love* writhe & shine - wish the guy was still doing it. haven't seen anything new in ages...

from the article i read, it was stated (paraphrased) cardiac arrest can really mean anything, as it doesn't indicate the cause of the cardiac arrest.

if i work there, you *are* forcing me, because more likely than not, i can't afford to just walk out & quit my job so as not to breathe your smoke. how hard is that for anyone to understand? i just don't get it...

saw that - waiting to see the tox screen now, cuz i'm wondering if it was an OD... it's sad.

excuse me!? who failed? i can practically guarantee that any guys who responded in here did so in all honesty, because that's the kind of community, and the type of people we have here. sorry, but that statement really bugged me...

wow... weird to see you with hair, but it seemed to suit you! :

seems to me, if you're asking the question, it's time...

a bit nostalgic...

have fun...

if i get my camera charged, i'll post a pic of my hair, it's pretty long now...

happy b-day!

you know what? i'm pissed off - what i *want* to do is get the cycle & go for a ride. the problem is, the only places open now are bars, and i haven't had a drink (nor want one) since last thursday. it'd be different if i had people to hang with, but have you ever tried going into a bar alone & asking for a water, or a diet coke? it's fucking stupid!