Warning Signs From A Church

[pharoh]

I thought it was funny, so I posted it here:

"This is a newsletter that St. Mary's church in Colorado Springs sent out this week:

If Your Child is a Gothic, Reform Through the Lord!

Listed below are some warning signs to indicate if your child may have gone astray from the Lord. Gothic (or goth) is a very obscure and often dangerous culture that young teenagers are prone to participating in.

The gothic culture leads young, susceptible minds into an imagined world of evil, darkness, and violence. Please seek immediate attention through counselling, prayer, and parental guidance to rid your child of Satan's temptations if five or more of the following are applicable to your child:

-Frequently wears black clothing.

-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.

-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nailpolish.

-Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include: reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various other Satanic worshipping symbols.

-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.

-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)

-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.

-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.

-Takes drugs.

-Drinks alcohol.

-Is suicidal and/or depressed.

-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation. (This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)

-Complains of boredom.

-Sleeps too excessively or too little.

-Is excessively awake during the night.

-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)

-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.

-Spends large amounts of time alone.

-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your child may speak to evil sprits through meditation.)

-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.

-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this.

-Misbehaves at school.

-Misbehaves at home.

-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this.

-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very

dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)

-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your

child may watch.)

-Plays videos games that contains violence or are of a role-playing nature.

-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.

-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.

-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.

-Expresses an interest in sex.

-Masturbates

-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.

-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism, Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.

-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".

-Claims to be a goth.

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.

~St. Mary's Catholic Church"

[torn asunder]

i think that's the funniest thing i've read in ages!!

[kellygrrrrrl]

Wow.......

[LuluVox]

That can't be real.

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

It's not... I hav seen it before attributed to another Church... infact.. i think there is another thread about it.

[phee]

It's not... I hav seen it before attributed to another Church... infact.. i think there is another thread about it.

I was gunna say.... How the hell do they know my dad soooo well

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

Ok..

Here it is... same church... 2004

http://freespirits.chosenones.net/archive/....php/t-217.html

and here it is again.. still St. Mary's but the town is not named...

http://www.funky.co.uk/board/showtopic/26198

and here it is being talked about as an Urban legend...

http://stnate.blogspot.com/2005/02/goths-l...-catholics.html

Just another way to bash anyone with Faith in God.

[HipsterDufus]

Just another way to bash anyone with Faith in God.

The best lies contain an element of truth...

[kellygrrrrrl]

damn, thats deep^

[HipsterDufus]

damn, thats deep^

It's from X-Files, thank you very much.

Oh man, why did I admit that I know that...

[Nevaeh]

i just thought it was funny...sounds like every single kid i've ever met in my day.

[pharoh]

Ok..

Here it is... same church... 2004

http://freespirits.chosenones.net/archive/....php/t-217.html

and here it is again.. still St. Mary's but the town is not named...

http://www.funky.co.uk/board/showtopic/26198

and here it is being talked about as an Urban legend...

http://stnate.blogspot.com/2005/02/goths-l...-catholics.html

Just another way to bash anyone with Faith in God.

Mark don't spoil the fun man

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

:devil

[Soulrev]

Funny how they say the Ankh is a form of a satanic worshipping symbol. Lol.. The egyptian symbol for life, which where the Christian cross originates from? Heh heh. People are fucking dumb. Guess what? I'm "goth", and I'm a Christian.. Hmmm....

[Hellion]

:devil I like how they pull that assume shit all the time

Hey I listen to Slayer and Morbid Angel,and I am goth,makes me a bad person.

OK Well "He who Fart in Church is Sitting on Pew"LOL!!

[n0Mad]

Funny how they say the Ankh is a form of a satanic worshipping symbol. Lol.. The egyptian symbol for life, which where the Christian cross originates from? Heh heh. People are fucking dumb. Guess what? I'm "goth", and I'm a Christian.. Hmmm....

I know my numbers are probably a bit skewed but a general breakdown on "Goths" is:

40% - Atheist or Agnostic

35% - Christian

10% - Jewish or Muslim

10% - Wican or other Spiritualism

4% - Buddhist, Taoist, Shinto, Hindu, Other

1% - Satanist

I like the way extreme fundamentalist Christians try to lump Wican in with Satanism and even everything that's not Christian into Satanism. The sad thing is, there are people at my church who think this way. I'm happy though that my pastor and many of the deacons are open minded and agree with me on personal freedom and expression.

[SpidersMoment]

check

check

check

check

check

uh oh....

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

Ugh.... Like... the above steaming pile of shit was not written by any church. It's a Hoax/urban legend. Some person or persons wrote that and published it on the web to get gullable people to think a church did it. They did this to get you to be upset with Christians.

[Soulrev]

Ugh.... Like... the above steaming pile of shit was not written by any church. It's a Hoax/urban legend. Some person or persons wrote that and published it on the web to get gullable people to think a church did it. They did this to get you to be upset with Christians.

Well that's obvious, but fun to make fun of anyway. I find humor in any topic. I'd rather laugh than be pissed off.

[Gaf The Horse With Tears]

This kind of thing doesn't piss me off. It helps to remind me that there are two types of people. People with a clue and people that need to be beaten out of the evolutionary tree with a clue.

[Brenda Starrr]

-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this.

It's "Count Chocula"

Fuckwads.

[BrassFusion]

i'm not sure anyone's touched on the possibility that this was created by christians lampooning goths lampooning christians lampooning goths.

because it SO matters. it's ALL in the context.

[DarkVampire]

Ignorance is bliss to the powers at be. What better way to keep the sheep in line by clouding them with lies and propaganda.

[Destroit]

"Eats goth related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this."

"Watches cable television or any other corrupted media source."

Those two, I thought were enough to send me over laughing hysterically...

but...THEN...I read this one:

"Masterbates"

Since this makes you goth, apparantly there's WAY WAYYY more of us then we ever could have even imagined!

[Onyx]

Funny how so many are overlooking the fact that was actually written as humor and doesn't trace back to any religious organization. Yeah, there are extremists out there who might be fairly close to this type of stupidity, but they aren't really Christians as far as I am concerned--they are violating nearly every single principle of their own religion, so that would exclude them also.

I know my numbers are probably a bit skewed but a general breakdown on "Goths" is:

40% - Atheist or Agnostic

35% - Christian

10% - Jewish or Muslim

10% - Wican or other Spiritualism

4% - Buddhist, Taoist, Shinto, Hindu, Other

1% - Satanist

I like the way extreme fundamentalist Christians try to lump Wican in with Satanism and even everything that's not Christian into Satanism. The sad thing is, there are people at my church who think this way. I'm happy though that my pastor and many of the deacons are open minded and agree with me on personal freedom and expression.

I think those numbers are pretty accurate.

I dislike extremes in *anything*, even something I participate in myself. It always ends in hatred and hurting someone.