Men

[Troy Spiral (13)]

Men are like fine wine: They all start out as grapes, and it is your job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd want to have with dinner.

Men are like computers: Hard to figure out and never have enough memory.

Men are like coolers: Load them with beer, and you can take them anywhere.

Men are like coffee: The best ones are rich, warm, and keep you up all night long.

Men are like horoscopes: They always tell you what to do, and they are always wrong.

Men are like plungers: They spend most of their time in the hardware store or the bathroom.

Men are like parking spots: The good ones are taken, and the rest are handicapped.

Why is psychoanalysis quicker for men than for women?

When it's time to go back to childhood, he's already there.

Why are men like commercials?

You can't believe a word they say.

How is a man like the weather?

Nothing can be done to change either one of them.

How many men does it take to open a can of beer?

None, it should be open when she brings it to him.

Why are guys like lava lamps?

They're fun to watch, but not very bright!

Marriage is not something men do.

Women get married. Men surrender.

Damn pigs i hate men!

[Absinthe]

Men are like women...only less intelligent and significant. (jk)

[BrassFusion]

men are like women, cept they have penises, external gonads, generally more body hair, and deeper voices.

[Absinthe]

men are like women, cept they have penises, external gonads, generally more body hair, and deeper voices.

obviously you have not met the woman that lives upstairs from me. I's say she has the body hair and deep voice thing going in a scary way. As for her gonads....I don't want to know.

[DeadBurgerKing (10)]

I'm avoiding this topic all together...this is the only reply I'm leaving to this topic...just to say I'm avoiding this topic...cause something tells me if I say anything more I'll get in trouble!!LMAO

[Homicidalheathen]

Men are like coffee: The best ones are rich, warm, and keep you up all night long.

I like that one.

[Onyx]

Eh, there are bad apples in any group of people, but as a general rule there are a lot of things I like about men. I could make a bunch of sweeping generalizations here, but I find most men are generally a bit calmer than me, and it tends to calm me down being around them. There are exceptions to every sort of generalization though.

Penises are amazing things. How in the world do they expand like that? :laughing

[Gauge]

marriage is like a tornado, in the begining theres a lot of sucking and blowing but in the end you loose your house.

[Steven]

marriage is like a tornado, in the begining theres a lot of sucking and blowing but in the end you loose your house.

not if you know what yrou doing babe.

Ive had two houses and there is still alot of sucking and blowing going on in this house...

[Gauge]

LOL its not something i came up with, the dj always use to say give that in his speach to scare bacholers when they came in for their parties at the Vu! It was fucking funny

[Sybil]

Eh, there are bad apples in any group of people, but as a general rule there are a lot of things I like about men. I could make a bunch of sweeping generalizations here, but I find most men are generally a bit calmer than me, and it tends to calm me down being around them. There are exceptions to every sort of generalization though.

Penises are amazing things. How in the world do they expand like that? :laughing

I second this.

AMAAAAZING.

[Msterbeau]

How in the world do they expand like that?

That's easy. Women.

[BrassFusion]

true... ladyparts do wild and crazy things as a result of guys, right?

[raziel4772]

How is a man like the weather?

Nothing can be done to change either one of them.

How many men does it take to open a can of beer?

None, it should be open when she brings it to him.

Some women would do well to learn the first one and as for the 2nd where can I find myself a woman like this? Its give and take I cook, so can I find me a girl that'll at least bring me a damn beer without trying to make me fell like a dick for asking.

[EvilEve]

why are men better than vibrators?

vibrators can't go and cut the lawn...

[Shade Everdark]

why are men better than vibrators?

vibrators can't go and cut the lawn...

Most men I know, including me, can't either.