Melancholy Bliss

[CixWicked]

I once broke into a place I didn't belong. It was entirely, and sincerely by accedent, but I don't suppose that makes it any less unlawful.

I was minding my own buisness, as I tend to try to do, just being myself and loving the trip that I have embarked on, when I stumbled into a place that was unfamilliar to me. I looked around, and... to describe it, it was a place of dire deprevity, and neglect. The place was truely in shambles, filled with spider webs, and debris all over. It was cold in this place, as if sunshine had never shown through it's windows, blackend with soot.

It was horrible, but something in that place stole my attention. Looking down on the ground I saw the impossible, heartbreaking, and ripe with despair. It was a flower... a rose actually, and it had taken bloom through the cracks in the concrete. It stood defiantly, but... the leaes were torn and wilted, and the stim was twisted and crooked. There were two cracks in windows... small slivers through which light shaned, but this strange, and beautiful rose leaned away from the shafts of life giving radience.

At first I wondered why, but when I looked down I saw and understood. Two smaller roses, one barely given bloom, and one no more than a bud, fresh from the seed were bathed in the light. These two smaller, potted roses lived in the wonderful ligth, oblivious by the fact of their youth, to the fact that the broken rose starved itself of the lifegiving sun that they may grow.

There was a beast which dwelled in this hellish place... barely a living thing, and teetering on the verge of it's own demise. And as time went on, and I watched, hidden in the shadows, I saw the beast pluck teder petals from the broken rose, 3 at a time. One he placed in the pot of each of the potted roses, and one he would devour himself, and then he would watch and wait. and defiantly, the broken rose would force itself to grow more petals.

The entire scene left me with a mix of anger, and despair. My heart broke at the sight, and I knew that this was not my place, but I -needed- to do something. So when the beast turned it's head away, it's belly full, I snuck over to the broken, and I shared with it, the tears that I shed, and I drew a small picture of the sun, that it might be nurtured a bit more.

And the rose looked at me, and it said. "I am broken... this is the life that I have been given. But thank you... you have shown me more kindness than I have ever known." She asked me only one thing... to be her friend. To never tell her falsehood, and never steal the light or the water from the other flowers.

I knew that I could help, and so I reached down, and grabbed the rose at the lowest point... at the stim just above the broken stone, and I pulled it up... I up rooted it, and I stole it away...

I brought that rose out into sunlight... And I loved and nurtured it. I gave it it's own pot to take root in, and to thrive, and in time I watched it grow strong... I saw it's stim straighten, and it's wilte leaves grew bright and grean, and it's petals soon numbered far more than 3. ANd the rose loved me, and cherished me. It entwined itself about my heart, and the water it drank was mine, and that which I drank was it's...

I was in love, and in that love I could see the true core of this beautiful rose, and I knew that it too loved and cherished me.

I kept this beautiful rose with all that i could give, and when it's petals would grow bigger and stronger than before, the rose would take them back and give them freeely. Not only to the small flowers, but to the beast as well. SHe knew that her place was with me but she could not abandon the life that it knew.

In the nights, when we were alone it told me of the world that it had known. It told me of the horrible places that it had blossemd in, and that the beast that I spoke of, as vile and dispicable as it was, was kind compaired to the others who had been in the tender roses life. This broke my heart further.

I told the rose that it's place was in the sun, basking in the beauty and glory of the day. That it deserved to thrive, and that all who looked upon it adored it's tenacity. It it told me that thoes that had adored it before had taken what they wanted from it... most times brutally, and without remorse. I cried... and fed her my tears... Such a horrible horrible life for something so beautiful.

Then one day, the rose looked at me and it said to me..."I will give you a gift that is more than I have ever given to any other. Even my beast, for you have treated me with more respect and kindness than I can even fathom that I deserve. And from it's petals in issued forth a simple drop of rose red water... and this was the most beautiful gift that I had ever been given.

My rose's life had been full of thoes who touted it's beauty, but had never done more in kindness than looked, and took what they wanted. it beleived, oddly, that this to was it's lot, and so respect and dignity was a strange and odd thing. But I was to be it's champion... this I decided.

But you see the beast, as kind as he had made himself out to be to her, could not bare to see something taken from him. Even something he found so base... And so he began to wage war... against me, against the rose... and it would use the blossems as often as anything to do this.

Finally, in a stroke of genious, it threatend the rose that if it did not return to his layer dispair... outside the light and warmth and love, that it would never see the blossems... and finally that it would allow itself to perish, and that his death would be on her leaves and her petals...

The rose left me... it returned to it's realm of dispair, for of all the threats, and all the hardships that it had suffered through, the one thing that it could not bare is the death of something that it had once loved... not when it would be on it's petals.

I cried... I watched it slipp from my hands... I watched it return to that reched place, and in kindness the beast poked another pin prick hole that the rose might bask in -some- brilliance. But the rose accepted this and suffered knowing the paradise that I would stop at nothing to give it.

ANd I stubbornly held hoep that one day, that rose... that stolen piece of beauty that I so deeply love, would return to me.

But as the hours turned to days, and days, as they do, turned to weeks, and weeks to months... My hope faltered... My dream burried itself deep inside me. I walked through the open garden, looking at flowers, but never could I bring myself to truely embrace them... I wanted my sweet, broken rose...

But one day, I stumbled across another rose... it was not broken, for it had florished in the garden. But something about this rose drew me to it. I like this rose a lot... Not love... not yet, but given time, I could...

Of course now, my sweet, broken rose came to me... not to beg me to take her back, but to tell me that I was right... that the beast turned on her... cast her out, for he did not like the new strength that she had gained...

I sit here now, torn... I still truely love only my broken rose... I know why my rose left me... I know that even though my heart was breaking, her actions were righteous to her situation... but I have also fealt it's thorns. I see this new rose, and in it I see potential... I see possibility...

I can not have both... What, oh what shall I do...?

Cixtian Trybe / Rose Gardener...

[Steven]

stop dicken around and make up your mind brutha, nothing real is safe.

(just a thought from someone who's been there)

[creatureofthenyte]

Yeah,

Make your choice dude.

Make sure that you can live with the choice you make, cuz once its made, there is no turning back.

I hope for the best for you.

This can be a very tough choice indeed.

[Homicidalheathen]

Broken roses often leave you with broken dreams, desires......mind and heart.

Although a healthy rose is a safe bet......maybe you need, or long for the drama and excitment the broken rose gives you?

A healthy rose will suit you in your old age.......one you can count on.

What is more important to you?

Stability or desire?

Someone who is there for you when you need them.......even on the boring nights.....which we are all headed to......as we age......or someone who is fun but for a fleeting moment?

[creatureofthenyte]

Hmmn, HH made a clearer point. I say go for stability that would be the better choice.

[Homicidalheathen]

That is an ongoing battle with me.

My P*ssy says go with this.......

My mind says go with that.......

My heart says go with something/one else......

Usually my twat and heart want to go in one direction but my mind is saying......

SAVE YOURSELF!!! RUN LIKE HELL YOU DUMB ASS BIATCH! HAVE YOU NOT LEARNED YOUR LESSON??!!

Once in awhile the heart and puss win and I regret it but god do I have fun in the meantime.

[Steven]

no no no people!

we are ALL broken. All of us. you have to CREATE stability, like you CREATE compatibility, you choose to either be or not be.....

[Homicidalheathen]

..oh and might I add one should be thankful one has choices at all. Really.

[creatureofthenyte]

Yeah, its awesome that Cix has the choice to make in the first place, some of the rest of us are not even that fortunate.