The Actual Long Term "goal Weight."

[violentivy]

My goal is when I stop looking like a blimp and huffing and puffing when I get up three flights of stairs while carrying both of my kids. Whatever weight that is, I'll be happy.

[JaneDead]

I never put an emphasis on a number, even when I had extra weight. I just wanted to feel good and be happy with my body. Weighing occasionally is ok, but it sets you up for a fall. Whenever I got on the scale and saw I lost weight, it made me hungry and seeing you gained, how discouraging. Are your clothes tighter? then you gained. Not as tight, then you lost; no change, well what do you think? Much easier to not obsess about the numbers in my opinion. Good luck to anyone fighting the battle of the bulge!

i agree. don't rely on the "numbers" on the scale. when i needed to lose weight (due to having a baby and low thyroid) i got nowhere. NOWHERE. and it was depressing. i hated how much i weighed and what size i was. then i started to get smaller. i focused more on what size i wanted to be, not how much i wanted to weigh. i had a "goal weight" in my head for so long and it turns out i don't need to be that weight to be this size.

[TygerLili]

Its hard to feels beautiful, when you don't like what you see in the mirror... Believe me, I know.....

I think that this is my problem... you all see me with my clothes on... clothes that smooth out here, lift there, this that, and the other.... you don't see what I see... not that I am calling you all lier's, because i firmly believe that you believe that I am pretty. I love me... the me that everyone sees... its the me they don't see, that I have a problem with. AND I am working towards changing that. My tummy's getting tighter, and my pants are getting HUGE! So, eventually, I will be that 135 lb girl that loved to run around her house naked... LMAO.... until then, I don't think that I will like myself very much...

We're all our own worst critic. Most people don't scrutinize us the way we scrutinize ourselves. When I look at my face in the mirror I see, a blemish here, a freckle I don't like there, the fact the my smile is slightly asymetrical or my teeth don't look white enough. I know other people don't look at me that intently (and I'd be freaked out if they did), they just see an attractive girl.

And thank heaven for clothes! Almost everyone, whether they're fat, skinny, or average, has something about their body that they are happy to be able to cover up with clothes. If I start feeling bad about my body, I just think about how most people dress to hide love-handles, tummy bulge, flabby thighs, small breasts, weird scars, something.

Edited February 27, 2008 by TygerLili

[Destroit]

no, bean water, you are consistent. And that works for you... and i don't know about the rest of everyone, but I am happy for you that you are achieving your goals. You, it seems to me, have always been beautiful. Its hard to feels beautiful, when you don't like what you see in the mirror... Believe me, I know.....

I think that this is my problem... you all see me with my clothes on... clothes that smooth out here, lift there, this that, and the other.... you don't see what I see... not that I am calling you all lier's, because i firmly believe that you believe that I am pretty. I love me... the me that everyone sees... its the me they don't see, that I have a problem with. AND I am working towards changing that. My tummy's getting tighter, and my pants are getting HUGE! So, eventually, I will be that 135 lb girl that loved to run around her house naked... LMAO.... until then, I don't think that I will like myself very much...

Another reason why I have such a hard time believing complements, or don't know how to handle them, is because for a year, the guy i was dating (back in 2004) called me worthless, fat, stupid, all kinds of things along those lines... tho I am the one that did everything around the house, did everything for him.... when i realized what was going on, I got out... but not soon enough.. the emotional damage had been done... unfortunately... now I am way more cautious than I use to be..

anyways... I will continue to work hard, to get where I want to be, and Bean, good luck sweetie! You've done so well, so far! ANd to anyone else that's trying to lose weight: good luck to you, as well!

Oh I know how the self loathing is. The funny part is that it's all in the eye of the beholder too. I'm 155 and since I'm no longer super model skinny like I was a year and a half ago it upsets me. I'll be happy again when I'm back down to my 127-130 range (which is the BARE minimum of what I should be at my 5'9" stature to be considered healthy. Anything under 125 is "underweight"), but until then...I'm not pretty in my mind. My face is okay, I always thought I have a cute face, but not so much in the body department.

The point of the above paragraph though is because some people would think I'm crazy for thinking I'm fat. I don't think I'm like massively overweight or anything, but I unarguably have pudge, and I am a no-pudge girl. I refuse to have any sort of flab on me what-so-ever, and if I do, I'm not happy.

BUT...what I think is interesting is that girls who are much heavier than I am have much more confidence than I do. I'm not dissing on that, just the contrary, if you're comfortable in your own skin then hey, kudos to you right? Wish we could all be like that. That's how we should all be, considering that we're keeping our weight within a healthy range (i.e. obese people ARE unarguably at risk for MASSIVE health problems. It is virtually impossible to be obese not have it have a negative effect on your body, no matter what you're eating. That is from a medical standpoint, not an opinion)

When I was 210 I got the nickname Trenchcoat Jay. Jay at that time because everyone in my friends group considered me to be male and "Trenchcoat" because I WOULD NOT TAKE OFF MY TRENCHCOAT. Period. People would try to pay me to take it off. I wouldn't do it. In my mind, it had a job to do: Cover up my body. I would wear it in HUNDRED DEGREE weather. In my mind I was appalling...but I still had guys hit on me and tell me I was cute and girls tell me I was crazy. It's all in the mind...ya see?

Now the sole purpose of my army looking trenchcoat is to bring sexy back (and NOT in hundred degree weather, thank God).

Damn...that was a little off topic of the thread, but not of your post (GRG), so I guess it's aight.

Edited February 27, 2008 by Chernobyl

[torn asunder]

I need numbers, I need something to work towards. I have the end goal in mind, but in the meantime, I have mini goals that I work towards with due dates.

I also keep strict track of my calorie intake.

I don't eat after a certain time in the day.

I make myself do some sort of exercise for at least 15 minutes per day. I know I need to add more to it, but I'm still trying to figure out how to budget my time between everything I have going on in my life at the moment.

I need goals because I would have never lost a pound if I didn't. It's just how I operate.

I used to weight myself 5-6 times a day as a kind of a motivator to not eat so much. Now I only weigh myself first thing in the morning after I wake up.

i would just like to add (and this is for everyone, not just bean) that if you're losing weight, there wil be a point where you *will* stop, no matter what you do. in fact, for anyone who is thinking about taking up any kind of weight training, you may find that you start to gain weight! the problem is, most people freak at this idea, even though that kind of weight (muscle) is actually beneficial. you may lose 5 pound of fat, but put on 6 pounds of muscle, and in no way is that a failure...

anyway, all i'm saying is, for now the weight numbers can be a goal, but don't ignore the fact that eventually, it won't apply. when the weight loss starts to slow significantly, it might be better to switch to a body fat % as a goal, which will allow you to build muscle (if needed/desired) and still work on "thinning/leaning out".

[Guest Megalicious]

LISTEN TO THE MIKE!!!!

I remember long ago when I first started train and I dropped all this weight. Mike tried to give me some good advice, I didnt listen. I was to focused on "yeah" I'm dropping.

Stubborn =)

[torn asunder]

LISTEN TO THE MIKE!!!!

I remember long ago when I first started train and I dropped all this weight. Mike tried to give me some good advice, I didnt listen. I was to focused on "yeah" I'm dropping.

Stubborn =)

:blush:

[Destroit]

i would just like to add (and this is for everyone, not just bean) that if you're losing weight, there wil be a point where you *will* stop, no matter what you do. in fact, for anyone who is thinking about taking up any kind of weight training, you may find that you start to gain weight! the problem is, most people freak at this idea, even though that kind of weight (muscle) is actually beneficial. you may lose 5 pound of fat, but put on 6 pounds of muscle, and in no way is that a failure...

anyway, all i'm saying is, for now the weight numbers can be a goal, but don't ignore the fact that eventually, it won't apply. when the weight loss starts to slow significantly, it might be better to switch to a body fat % as a goal, which will allow you to build muscle (if needed/desired) and still work on "thinning/leaning out".

YES! Very very good point. While people this does not apply to unless you do regular weight training, I remember in highschool in my WT class there were a group of unusually ditzy girls (PC way of saying "cheerleaders"). One girl, who was RAIL thin started crying because by the time the class was over with she "gained 6 lbs".

It took ever fiber of my being not to smack her and everyone one of her friends, but I figured getting suspended over stupid people wasn't worth it so I let it be and said to her, "man, I guess that fat really sneaks up on you, doesn't it" which obviously heightened her hysteria and crying.

I know...I'm evil but I REALLY try to be good. I swear. Not only does my evilness slip out sometimes, but hell, in certain cases people deserve it .

So like Mike says, if you're in a weight training regimen and I hear you bitch about "gaining weight" do not be surprised if I slap ya one. (I'm kidding..I'd never physically smack anyone on here)

[hunhee]

I think it has everything to do with the way you see yourself. The weight is in my head, and the numbers were a gauge into my depressions and self loath.

When I used to look in the mirror, I only saw the flab that was me. I didn't want to see the parts I actually LIKED about me (trust me those were few and far between).

I have no mirrors in my place that I can see my body in, I considered the mirror my mortal enemy. I did this purposefully, so I wouldn't have to look at the ugly truth. "I hate my body" So much so that I convinced myself that I am unattractive to men, but especially to the one person that counted. I got ruled by my low self-esteem, and low self-worth.

Now, I'm on more of a positive upswing on the bad body-image angle. I have decided to instead of hating myself for what I am, change my habits so that I CAN like the skin I'm in. I started at the beginning of this year, and I've definitely taken notice.

When I look in the mirror, I may still THINK .. oh god 'manda you're a fat glob, but then I stop myself and think, I like that little indent that will someday be my more slender waist (that's more defined now), and the curve of my hips. I MAKE myself see the things I like instead of focusing on the things I don't. If I think one negative, then I purposefully find two positives.

Yes, I like to know that the scale agrees with me, when I weigh in every week, but it doesn't make me sad when it goes up, it's definitely consistency. I've consistently gone down since the beginning of the year.

I also find little ways to reward myself (NOT WITH FOOD). When I have my first recorded 10 lbs (crosses fingers for this weekend), I'm buying myself a pair of shoes. I haven't figured what I'm doing at 20 and 30 and dare I say 40, but new clothes will probably be in order.

[ttogreh]

Weight is amorphous. As has been said, muscle mass weighs more than fat. These days, there are electronic scales that are capable of calculating body fat, water content, and the like. For those of us that are unhappy with their health, ignore the weight number, buy a pedometer and a modern body fat sensing scale.

Use the pedometer for three days, find out what your average daily number of steps are, and then, using that as a baseline, try to add 25 steps a day, every day, for two weeks. That's a total of 350 extra steps, by the way. That's actually quite tiny. About a quarter of a city block.

In short, if you are at all motivated, you will be able to reach this goal.

After two weeks, try to add fifty extra steps a day, every day for two weeks. That, along with the 350 steps you already have banked for yourself will get you 1,050 extra steps.

Now... and only now, should you start paying attention to your body fat percentage. Talk to your doctor, talk to your friends, and pay attention to what you are eating. Don't starve yourself, but remember what you are eating.

Smallsteps.gov is a great resource for other ideas.

[nilhil_glory]

weight is an odd subject indeed, i am up to 170 myself and im not big in the least bit at all (if youve seen me in person most people think im 140ish

if i get uncomfertable with my self around the waist i know its unhealthy but im able to do it

i will just grab a couple 5-10 lb hand weights and then jog 1- two miles for a week and that usually keeps me in check but im also active with other things

[Nienna]

I'm a bit obsessive about numbers. I know the sizes for everything I put on my body. I know my measurements... and I know my weight, every day. It's the only way I can avoid slipping because even thinking about food makes me gain. I'm not kidding.

[bean]

My weight hasn't been changing very much lately, so I've been measuring myself weekly to see if I've lost inches. I've got about 6 months to lose as much as I can (for the wedding).

Edited March 18, 2008 by bean water

[odims_sphere]

My weight loss goal? Weigh less. ;o)

For serious though where I was when I left the "war" was pretty good.

[CandyQuackenbush]

My weight loss goal? Weigh less. ;o)

For serious though where I was when I left the "war" was pretty good.

Me too.

[torn asunder]

My weight hasn't been changing very much lately, so I've been measuring myself weekly to see if I've lost inches. I've got about 6 months to lose as much as I can (for the wedding).

great! way to modify your goals to keep on track!!

[Pandora]

I'm a bit obsessive about numbers. I know the sizes for everything I put on my body. I know my measurements... and I know my weight, every day. It's the only way I can avoid slipping because even thinking about food makes me gain. I'm not kidding.

Agree with all of that.

If I don't have a goal weight I'm dead in the water. Now I'm working on keeping the daily journal to really identify patterns, and break the bad ones.