Who Here Is Single

[kat (1)]

Oh god forever alone! XD

Aww your still young hon. You can have anything you want. It's all up to you. Wai til your my age and possibly been divorced once already. .the selection is like bachelor #1 lives in parents basement, games all day long and doesn't own a toothbrush or bath. Bachelor #2 is certifiably psychotic from years of drug addiction, has a PPO against him from several women and just lost his business and his trailer and wakes you up to yell at u in the middle of the night about how he misses his kid's and his ex is a cunt and your a witch, or Bachelor #3....the pothead grower who can't make money cause he smokes it all up who gets shot because the neighbors in his shady neighborhood know too much. (Yes these are true stories) *weeps*

[kat (1)]

....and bachelor #4 is a cocky douchebag who has it shit together but he did you a favor now you feel indebted to him cause he lets you know frequently. ...bachelor #5 is gay but doesn't think anyone knows..bachelor #6 the married man ( they are perfect but married man.. fucking tanlines dude your not that slick. ....ok I won't list anymore I'm bordering on whore territory. I don't care. Not that I care either way. *sighs* I've crossed whore territory awhile ago. I'm recovering now. Maybe.

Wait 7 is 45 year old wannabe rocker but 8...8 is soulmate. .the 8th times a charm lol..yea right.

Edited August 27, 2014 by kat

[ZombieNiXXon]

Damn that is crazy but I hope your ok in the long run Kat that is something. I say what we go through makes us learn important lesson's in life just like my mom told me. So time to reflect in my mind are just reminder's to keep yourself strong. Also thank for the advice and interesting word's of wisdom haha. You are an awesome person though thank you for the hope! ^_^ Also keep being awesome and never let anyone keep you down hun.

[kat (1)]

Damn that is crazy but I hope your ok in the long run Kat that is something. I say what we go through makes us learn important lesson's in life just like my mom told me. So time to reflect in my mind are just reminder's to keep yourself strong. Also thank for the advice and interesting word's of wisdom haha. You are an awesome person though thank you for the hope! ^_^ Also keep being awesome and never let anyone keep you down hun.

Awe, shucks. ..lol. Thanks. You went ahead and made my day!

[ZombieNiXXon]

Anytime! Aslo whoo! I feel good I was able to make someone's day :D

[kat (1)]

...if I ever have another relationship it will be the person that is willing to sit on the porch with me and drink our morning coffee together until we're old and gray. That's all I want.

[AntiHero]

"...if I ever have another relationship it will be the person that is willing to sit on the porch with me and drink our morning coffee together until we're old and gray. That's all I want."

Well said, kat.

There are very few people I actually connect with, and that makes for a lonely life. I also get this feeling that I'm waiting for something, but I don't know what. Not in terms of relationship, but life in general.

[kat (1)]

"...if I ever have another relationship it will be the person that is willing to sit on the porch with me and drink our morning coffee together until we're old and gray. That's all I want."

Well said, kat.

There are very few people I actually connect with, and that makes for a lonely life. I also get this feeling that I'm waiting for something, but I don't know what. Not in terms of relationship, but life in general.

Thanks.. It's funny you say waiting for something to happen because it seems like everyone I know is waiting for the right time or something to happen but I'm learning there is no right time nor will there every be a right time.. Life is just happening... Nothing will ever be the right time.. I think that's how we end up alone.. But idk. Edited October 26, 2014 by kat

[kat (1)]

Always, shit I've at this point deactivated fb, deleted dating profile, play bitch in public and plan to just take care of me. Relationships and dating are omg unbelievably difficult for me. Ever guy I meet reminds me off something from someone else in my past. I have penis PTSD. Jaded to the point of enlightenment:) Its like freedom in my heart... As long as my phone don't ring...lol, than I get anxiety and gotta shit. He he asshole repellent.

Edited December 28, 2014 by kat

[DJ Nihil]

Being alone used to bother me but it doesn't anymore. The tired and repetitive rejection does and it hurts more everytime it happens rather than making things less painful. I have given up on the possibility of finding someone and would rather just be left the fuck alone at this point.

I have very little responsibilities and no kids and that is going to make things easier in the long run. I'd rather have calm, and peace and quiet forever at this point. If I should happen to meet someone, then fine, but it is at the bottom of my list of priorities at this point.

[kat (1)]

Surprise! I just can't do it, I am a strong but strange character, its OK. I like me, even if love does not. And I am fully aware of my track record.. Its a fail, I take responsibility.. It can't be everyones fault that I've dated.. I blame me. My choices suck and I'm so used to my independance I never knew love like truly, I have stupid ideas..

Edited February 14, 2015 by kat

[kat (1)]

Surprise! I just can't do it, I am a strong but strange character, its OK. I like me, even if love does not. And I am fully aware of my track record.. Its a fail, I take responsibility.. It can't be everyones fault that I've dated.. I blame me. My choices suck and I'm so used to my independance I never knew love like truly, I have stupid ideas..

this.

[kat (1)]

I CANNOT get involved and invested again. I will be friends with a person, maybe hang out like casually but helllll no, I will not feel that failure and rejection again. I didn't follow my gut with the last one, I let him right in and again destruction in my life. I am sooo naive and so stupid for making the mistake over and over again, knowing the whole time he wasn't the one at any point did I feel like we were right for each other but loneliness. I never want that hurt and drama again. Never again will I be hurt. Maybe one day the right one will come along. I will not ignore my gut again, though the next one, if ever will be the one. I'm done with bullshit.

Edited October 13, 2015 by kat

[kat (1)]

Forever and fuck it. My head isnt right my life is a mess and everyone else ia better than me. Noone deserves the mess.

Edited June 29, 2017 by kat

[Draco1958]

On ‎1‎/‎24‎/‎2015 at 2:46 AM, DJ Nihil said:

Being alone used to bother me but it doesn't anymore. The tired and repetitive rejection does and it hurts more everytime it happens rather than making things less painful. I have given up on the possibility of finding someone and would rather just be left the fuck alone at this point.

 

I have very little responsibilities and no kids and that is going to make things easier in the long run. I'd rather have calm, and peace and quiet forever at this point. If I should happen to meet someone, then fine, but it is at the bottom of my list of priorities at this point.

Sometimes it bothers me and sometimes it doesn't.  Currently not having income and going for disability I question as to whether I could take care of a partner.  Would I be good for her or not.  So being single is ok.  But then when you go to bed alone and wake up alone, being single sucks.  I miss waking up and being able to say good morning beautiful.  And it sucks because sometimes you meet someone you want to take a chance with and you put yourself and your feelings out there and end up feeling unworthy because of their reaction.  Then all you want to do is crawl into bed, pull the covers over your head and never wake up.  You start to question your value to others, whether is it even worth being around.  You start to wonder if you just disappeared would you even be missed.  Some nights when you go to bed you pray not to wake up.  So being single is mixed for me.  I find it difficult to approach someone to let them know I am interested in them.  So if I do that, it means I see something special in them, something I want to explore, find commonality, learn from the differences.  So because of that, rejection tears into me like a dull knife.  It hurts deeper than I can put into words.  I could explain more but suffice to say I know I am not the worst choice a girl could make.

[EatAjaxAndDie]

20 hours ago, Draco1958 said:

Sometimes it bothers me and sometimes it doesn't.  Currently not having income and going for disability I question as to whether I could take care of a partner.  Would I be good for her or not.  So being single is ok.  But then when you go to bed alone and wake up alone, being single sucks.  I miss waking up and being able to say good morning beautiful.  And it sucks because sometimes you meet someone you want to take a chance with and you put yourself and your feelings out there and end up feeling unworthy because of their reaction.  Then all you want to do is crawl into bed, pull the covers over your head and never wake up.  You start to question your value to others, whether is it even worth being around.  You start to wonder if you just disappeared would you even be missed.  Some nights when you go to bed you pray not to wake up.  So being single is mixed for me.  I find it difficult to approach someone to let them know I am interested in them.  So if I do that, it means I see something special in them, something I want to explore, find commonality, learn from the differences.  So because of that, rejection tears into me like a dull knife.  It hurts deeper than I can put into words.  I could explain more but suffice to say I know I am not the worst choice a girl could make.

Jesus fucking christ... you nailed my feelings exactly. Becoming recently separated and getting divorced I feel that exact same way. Plus I felt it before I was married and everything.

[Draco1958]

10 minutes ago, EatAjaxAndDie said:

Jesus fucking christ... you nailed my feelings exactly. Becoming recently separated and getting divorced I feel that exact same way. Plus I felt it before I was married and everything.

I was divorced in 2003.  Wife walked out on me in 2000.  I have always had self doubts before I got married.  So even though I was happy when I got married, I always felt like the shoe would drop so to speak.  5 months after my mom had a stroke putting her in a nursing home, my wife walked out.  She tried to make it sound it was all my fault but her argument for the divorce made me mad.  All the things she pointed out as the reason were changes she made during the marriage.  Changes she wanted including no more sex but she was going to find me a girlfriend.  That didn't happen and I must admit I really didn't want that anyway.  The real reason she left was the fact that my mom didn't remember her name after the stroke.  True 11 years married you wouldn't expect that but my mom didn't even remember my name.  Additionally my mom was living with us and helping with the bills.  So once her social security went to pay the nursing home, she got mad.  Basically she stomped off like a little child.  So the feelings of inadequacy flooded me.  Other than short term dating a few times I have basically been single since 2000.  And now with medical issues and no funds, I figure I will die a lonely old man.  As outspoken in groups as I can be, when approaching a woman to express interest scares the crap out of me.  It takes a lot of effort to do that so when turned down, it really rips at my heart and soul.

[EatAjaxAndDie]

22 minutes ago, Draco1958 said:

I was divorced in 2003.  Wife walked out on me in 2000.  I have always had self doubts before I got married.  So even though I was happy when I got married, I always felt like the shoe would drop so to speak ... And now with medical issues and no funds, I figure I will die a lonely old man.  As outspoken in groups as I can be, when approaching a woman to express interest scares the crap out of me.  It takes a lot of effort to do that so when turned down, it really rips at my heart and soul.

I get it, I really do. I'm not very outspoken but I feel the same way when it comes to approaching women.

[kat (1)]

I look like a dude.

[EatAjaxAndDie]

13 hours ago, kat said:

I look like a dude.

Pretty sure that isn't true...

[Trene4000]

Single and loving it!  

I see no reason why I should rush into another relationship.

[kat (1)]

On 6/30/2017 at 9:22 AM, EatAjaxAndDie said:

Pretty sure that isn't true...

It's just hard not to feel like a dude when you're balls are bigger than any dude you dated, also I have no boobs.

[Scary Guy]

2 hours ago, kat said:

It's just hard not to feel like a dude when you're balls are bigger than any dude you dated, also I have no boobs.

 

Virtual balls /= actual balls.  You also have more boob mass than I do.  Not to mention I'm pretty sure you've had a kid; so biologically it's all there.

I'm sure eventually the right person will come along.  It's just the waiting that's kills me (because time kills everything).

At least I love myself, which is good because nobody likes a narcissist :D

[Troy Spiral (13)]

On 6/28/2017 at 9:15 PM, Draco1958 said:

Sometimes it bothers me and sometimes it doesn't.  Currently not having income and going for disability I question as to whether I could take care of a partner.  Would I be good for her or not.  So being single is ok.  But then when you go to bed alone and wake up alone, being single sucks.  I miss waking up and being able to say good morning beautiful.  And it sucks because sometimes you meet someone you want to take a chance with and you put yourself and your feelings out there and end up feeling unworthy because of their reaction.  Then all you want to do is crawl into bed, pull the covers over your head and never wake up.  You start to question your value to others, whether is it even worth being around.  You start to wonder if you just disappeared would you even be missed.  Some nights when you go to bed you pray not to wake up.  So being single is mixed for me.  I find it difficult to approach someone to let them know I am interested in them.  So if I do that, it means I see something special in them, something I want to explore, find commonality, learn from the differences.  So because of that, rejection tears into me like a dull knife.  It hurts deeper than I can put into words.  I could explain more but suffice to say I know I am not the worst choice a girl could make.

 

I Struggle with this constantly both the money part and the being alone (or not)  and the not necessarily wanting to 'continue' sometimes...  Intellectually I know at least a FEW women have specifically went out of their way to say they don't care that I'm not working and that Its not an issue.   Well it FEELS like a huge issue for me.  Its worse still when they don't have a job or make much money either. 

Then, there is a problem of commonality, I know from experience that even IF all the above is fine, not sharing any (or not hardly any) core interests sucks really bad, which I'd rather be alone and have freedom... but then we loop back around again. 

All we can do is "manage".  I'm not sure there is a true , 100% fix.  Hopefully the management is on the positive side more than not. 
 

[Troy Spiral (13)]

On 7/5/2017 at 11:48 PM, kat said:

It's just hard not to feel like a dude when you're balls are bigger than any dude you dated, also I have no boobs.

pfft. Who you kidding, I know for a fact, like doctor inspection style, that you have boobs.  Your ball size is variable, from tiny to huge, depending on the situation.  I think that last part is normal, which is one of the few things I think that IS normal about me and not to be presumptuous but most of us around here.