After A Break-up..

[hunhee]

OK, I'm curious.. after you break up with someone, or someone breaks up with you..or it's just a mutual break up..

How long would it be customary to wait before starting to date again, you know without offending the other party (if you're still friends)??

How long have you waited in the past?

[Guest GodfallenPromos]

OK, I'm curious.. after you break up with someone, or someone breaks up with you..or it's just a mutual break up..

How long would it be customary to wait before starting to date again, you know without offending the other party (if you're still friends)??

How long have you waited in the past?

depends on the previous relationship....maybe 3 days....6 months...a year...really varies...

[Pandora]

OK, I'm curious.. after you break up with someone, or someone breaks up with you..or it's just a mutual break up..

How long would it be customary to wait before starting to date again, you know without offending the other party (if you're still friends)??

How long have you waited in the past?

I've never been friends with an ex so I don't know. I gather it depends on how close you were with your ex. In love - a few weeks maybe? Just dating but kinda close, a few weeks?

And do you have to tell your ex about a new guy until it gets serious? I wouldn't tell mine unless it was, or unless a couple of months had passed I think.... I wouldn't want to hurt him, but I'm also not going to pass up any chances at love with someone new.

[Oh_My_Goth]

I say once it is over, it is open season immediately.....

[TygerLili]

I think it's all about how soon you feel comfortable with dating again. Your ex might not be thrilled when you start dating again no matter how long you wait, but if the friendship is strong you should eventually be able to work it out. It's hard to go immediately from a break up to being friends, even if it was a mutual decision.

Then again, sometimes you feel like you're not ready to be dating yet, but a person comes into your life that you're interested in and you want to see where it goes, even though you're not over your ex yet at the time.

[Rev.Reverence]

ZEN ANSWER

You already know the answer...

..it's in your heart.....

.....if it isn't now; when it is, you will know..

GIRLY ANSWER...

After he looks like he's about to hook up with someone, BANG..

..you get some...& he's still friendly, 'cause he's distracted by a new conquest on the horizon...

If ya wait till after he hooks up with someone else, he won...

(You&I know it's not a competition...I'm just paraphrasing someone from long ago)

If you go straight out, and do the deed...you look 'sluty'...so be really discreet! *wink*

(Talk about double standards huh? I'm just reporting!)

BOYS...THIS WILL NOT WORK AS ADVICE FOR YOU...UNLESS YOUR A REALLY QUEER ONE...

yes...I mean 'queerer' than ME!

[TygerLili]

Oh, and if we remained friends I would tell my ex if I was seeing someone new, and I would expect him to do the same for me.

I'd much rather hear about it straight from him than hear it from someone else, or just find out about it.

[Goth Brooks]

Oh, and if we remained friends I would tell my ex if I was seeing someone new, and I would expect him to do the same for me.

I'd much rather hear about it straight from him than hear it from someone else, or just find out about it.

uhm... why?

i have absolutely zero interest in the love lives of any girl i've dated. if they had any interest in mine after we broke up, then obviously they have issues to work out in their own head concerning me.

[hunhee]

So what I hear is, girls should pretend to wait and do whatever it is they do discretely.. Isn't that going against the friendship?

and guys it's just a free-for-all.. they can do whatever whenever..

yeah, that's a double standard..

[hunhee]

uhm... why?

i have absolutely zero interest in the love lives of any girl i've dated. if they had any interest in mine after we broke up, then obviously they have issues to work out in their own head concerning me.

because I said.. If they remain FRIENDS silly butt..

[hunhee]

ZEN ANSWER

You already know the answer...

..it's in your heart.....

.....if it isn't now; when it is, you will know..

GIRLY ANSWER...

After he looks like he's about to hook up with someone, BANG..

..you get some...& he's still friendly, 'cause he's distracted by a new conquest on the horizon...

If ya wait till after he hooks up with someone else, he won...

(You&I know it's not a competition...I'm just paraphrasing someone from long ago)

If you go straight out, and do the deed...you look 'sluty'...so be really discreet! *wink*

(Talk about double standards huh? I'm just reporting!)

BOYS...THIS WILL NOT WORK AS ADVICE FOR YOU...UNLESS YOUR A REALLY QUEER ONE...

yes...I mean 'queerer' than ME!

I can't trust my heart, it says for me to be a nun.. I'm nowhere near catholic. :/

that was a joke people.. LMAO

[TygerLili]

uhm... why?

i have absolutely zero interest in the love lives of any girl i've dated. if they had any interest in mine after we broke up, then obviously they have issues to work out in their own head concerning me.

because I said.. If they remain FRIENDS silly butt..

Exactly. Of course of the break-ups I've been through where we remained friends both sides still had feelings for the other person.

[torn asunder]

honestly, if you're no longer together, you're not beholden to them anymore, and as such, can do whatever you will. it's up to them to cope with the thought of you moving on. of course, one can do so without being an ass about it.

one of my exes broke up with me because we had been dating, but not committed, and she wanted to pursue a relationship with a guy she met, and thought might work out long-term. (she said she couldn't see both of us, seriously, at the same time - it didn't work out with him, unfortunately) i thought it was great that she met someone, and once she had grown past the sad emotions of our split, she would tell me about the guys she dated, and sometimes even ask my advice.

i guess it really depends on the people involved, but if one has moved on and the other hasn't, that's no reason for the one who has (moved on) not to date. it can be done with consideration and tact, and should be, but it shouldn't be avoided for the sake of another to whom you're no longer committed.

of course, this is only my opinion...

[Rev.Reverence]

So what I hear is, girls should pretend to wait and do whatever it is they do discretely.. Isn't that going against the friendship?

and guys it's just a free-for-all.. they can do whatever whenever..

yeah, that's a double standard..

I get smacked by the 'Doubles' as well.

& I've never been in the situation...Exactly..

My past relations tend to...overlap..heehe

[Msterbeau]

I think it very much depends on each relationship. Sometimes I've pretty much checked out before the final ending and I'm ready to move on. Sometimes I'm not ready a year later.

[Riku Namako]

this is a double edged sword you have goin here. but it really does depend on the breakup itself. if its a bad breakup, then dating someone/hooking up immediately will often or not make you out to look like you're either doin it for a revenge sorta purpose (especially if you both hang out in the same places and you just happen to be flaunting it all over), or that you just grabbed the first person who was interested on the rebound. If it was mutual and not on bad terms, it kinda doesn't matter, but if you get jealous of your ex, or vice versa, there's not much they can really do about it, since you both agreed that things just weren't working between you both in the first place. but that sets things up for all kinds of other bad circumstances, jealousy being one of them, which can lead to one party seeking revenge or perhaps sabotage. The worst is when you break up with someone, (not worrying about what kinda terms cuz it almost doesn't matter) and then you, or your ex hooks up with one or the others close friends. then that begs the questions to be asked, "wtf, we break up and you hook up with one of my friends? How long has this kinda crap been goin on? Is this why we broke up in the first place?" among other things. and then that kinda drama can go on and on and on....etc etc...usually doesn't end up well at all. trying to hide something like that only makes it worse as well, cuz once the secret is out, and it usually ends up getting out cuz these kinds of secrets don't last, well...you get the idea.

[Homicidalheathen]

Your not obligated to wait......wait until your heart has healed.

It would be rude however to do it and let them know.....at all........for like 6 months unless they are truely ok with it. But how can you be sure.....some say.....no go ahead...I am ok.....and then they get mad.

Don't flaunt it is all.

[Hellion]

I just move on and concentrate on my future,I learned awhile back to not dwell and I don't immediately look again, either.but enjoy the extra free time.