Anyone have a loved one with cancer?

[Brian4wheels]

I was just wondering because my dad has cancer of the esophagus and it incureable and I'm completely stressed. I can't take anymore bad news.

[Miranda]

I'm sorry to hear about the news. It's a devastating blow and yes, I have had family members who have had Cancer and been biopsied for possible Cancer. It doesn't always mean a quick death sentence anymore. I mean that with absolute respect to you and your father. It's important to try to stay as strong as you can. Everyone reacts to this type of situation differently. You feel you will lose in the end so it's very hard to tell you not to feel the pain when he cannot be cured. I send you much strength and support. If you ever need to talk, please feel free to pm. *hugs*

[torn asunder]

grandfather died from bone cancer, which spread everywhere... only thought is to just be with him. it will be much appreciated.

[Homicidalheathen]

I lost my father in law to esophagial cancer. My heart goes out to you...bad place to get it. Spreads fast.

I wish they had not treated him all it did was make his last few months unbearable what with the chemo side effects

Cancer happens on my side of the family too...mostly skin..but some organs other than skin...however our family is from NC and there is something in the soil there that causes it

Hope you have time to spend with him in these last days.

[Nienna]

Both of my Grandfathers passed from prostate cancer within 6 nmonths of eachother. I'm also an ovarian cancer survivor. I can say that the best thing you can do right now is love him and spend as much happy and quality time with him as possible. Try not to dwell on losing him, because his primary concern is the people he'll be leaving behind.

[StormKnight (1)]

Yes, my father died of bladder cancer after 2 1/2 years of fighting it. It goes right up there with esophageal cancer with insidious ravaging of the body, and is about as quiet in its development and symptoms.

I knew from the day he told me the diagnosis how screwed he was if treatments didn't take. The man physically saved my life more times than I want to imagine, and was the fair one in the family, one I could always expect equal justice. For all my knowledge, all my abilities, all I could do is watch him die when the treatments failed.

I couldn't even finish medical school before he died. It was the one thing no one in my family (including him,) thought well of, that dream of mine. Had I followed their advice, I would have been...something else. It was a pride point while he was fighting the cancer that one of his sons was going to be a doctor, proving him wrong about my dream. It was the only thing I proved him wrong on, and he was proud of me for that. I couldn't give him final evidence I was right and his pride was not misplaced until 3 years, 2 months after he had been ashes. It has been the greatest sore point with my relations to the military medical school and myself to board me from the service at that time.

I saw him at hospice once before he passed. The rest of the family wanted to show of the various gadgets and devices that were hooked up to him over the course of the years of fighting. I wanted to see him, the man himself. We talked. We had longed buried our ghosts before he even went to hospice. The last talk alone with him I didn't want to end. He had to shoo me out of the room for me to make my flight back. If there ever was a darkness following me, it was most tangible the day I left his room and the hospice.

I wasn't there when he died; I wanted to remember him for who he was, not how he died. All I have of his is a badge I knew he wore, and my memories. I still remember him on the day he died, and I will force the issue with my workplace to make sure I have that day off.

So, yes, I have had someone I fiercely love die of cancer.

My only recommendations:

1. Give the fight as best as the two of you can. Esophageal cancer has a chance (I know it is slim,) to respond to chemotherapy to reduce the tumor to a surgically resectable size. Yes, chemotherapy stinks on ice, and the surgery to resect is quite involved and difficult, but it is the best fight I can recommend.

2. Bury your ghosts if you have them with him. Now. And enjoy your time with him.

3. If the fight fails, give your best to be there for him.

[Brian4wheels]

I wanna thank everyone that has posted for their support and for those yet to post. Sadly my dad is losing his fight. Doctors say he has about a month but he A) Has a pre-exixting heart ondition that is complicating things. and B) Has a clot on his lung which is causing him to have difficulty breathing. He's being weened of the breathing machine and switching to oxygen.

We want him to come home so he can die peacefully there but we don't think he's gonna make it.

Once again I thank everyone for their support with all of this.

Brian

[Msterbeau]

I lost two good friends to it. I can't imagine losing my father. You do have the "blessing" of having the time to prepare for it and to spend time with him. You and your father are in my thoughts.

[sass_in_the_pants]

Just spend as much time as possible with him right now.

I will save a special place in my prayers for you and your family.

[Rev.Reverence]

Say prayers to ease the Soul into the Next realm of it's existence...

..know that I pray this/these prayers daily...for the countless Souls that go with no one around to see them off.

[Bernadette]

Gosh, sorry to hear that. *hugs*

Lost my uncle in europe a few years ago to lung cancer .. horrible disease!

[JaneDead]

i have had many family members who have had cancer. and currently my 9 year old brother has leukemia.

my thoughts are with you. seeing a loved one go through that is hell.

[tanuki1985]

Cancer runs in my dad's side of the family, so yes, I have had many loved ones with cancer. My dad lost both of his parents and two of his five siblings to cancer. One of his other siblings is now battling cancer for the THIRD time. He's a freakin' trooper.

I'm really sorry to hear about your father's cancer. *hugs* Since you say it's incurable, my suggestion is just to let him live out his final days however he chooses and to be there for him through it all. That's what I'd want if I found out that I had an incurable form of cancer.

[Scales]

My grandma died from brain cancer when I was little. I've had relatives both die from it and live through it, it's tough.

[Slogo]

about 2 months ago my uncle lost his battle with lung cancer. It's very sad, though if you think the end is near there is no way you can't make his last few weeks, months, or even years (it's very possible) the best of his life. Just by being there and talking. Sometimes a smile on their face can make everything seem better even if for a little while.