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A penny for your thoughts..


jynxxxedangel

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  • I am thinking about my hole in the wall.
  • I am thinking about the business that I need to get off the ground but there's a HUGE peace plant on the table and that's the ONLY surface that's big enough for me to work on. Plant go on the floor, because the pigs will eat it.
  • I am thinking about this coming weekend, and how excited I am because I haven't spent time w/ him for 3 weeks.
  • I am thinking about trying to convence a certain someone ;) that I would be a good asset to their living quarters. *giggles*
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I am thinking about getting thru this month, working as much as I can to make as much money as I can.

There is a possibility that I may be able to make a particular bill, that has been quite the albatross around my wallet for far too long, to go buh bye this month, and I want to do everything I can do to ensure that comes to pass.

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I picked up a "real job" interview tomorrow afternoon, for a gig selling hot dogs at a building supply store. I would probably be able to make good tips, if I were to wear something slightly low-cut. Maybe pick up a bit of side-work from the construction guys, if you know what I mean.. I have ulterior motives. ;) My life is all about making connections!

I'm a bit nervous about the interview, because it's been awhile since I worked at an over-the-table job. I need a small, steady income to fall back on during hard times like these, though. I am also going to apply at a local establishment tomorrow for a bartender/waitress position. Wish me luck.

My main thoughts right now are money and work. These two things are my permanent mantras.

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The cosmos is a sea of constellations, a system of connection, mirrored by the consciousness as best as it can, movements impact the constellation and it's reflections.

So under this theory, instead of looking for a smallest unit of energy or matter, it's of curiosity if instead there is dimensional transference at some ridiculously small scale; I kind of wonder if there are multiple universes stacked inside of each other instead of on top of each other (string theory), to make possibilities possible.

With the mass movements created by organisms from atoms on up in cognitive reaction to their environments, correlating with the idea that on some incredibly small scale there is dimensional transference, there could be an argument that we have some free-will.

Whereas I've mostly seen more proof of fate, which moving through time, I can't fully believe in.

Eh.. thinking about death usually gets me thinking about philosophy.

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I'm thinking about how I wish there was someone out there who could see through my eyes and then say "Wow I understand why you're the way you are" instead of telling me that I should be someone with rainbows and sunshine coming out of my ass. I wish there was someone out there who could just get me and accept that there are parts of me that will never be right no matter how much I wish they were. I wish there was a man out there strong enough to deal with me at my worst just so he could see me when I'm at my best. I wish my sister would actually acknowladge how much I've given up for her instead of acting like it was no big deal for me to give up all my plans to move here. But it's not like any of that will happen or matter. Shit it's not even worth a penny.

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I am thinking how confused I am. I just got my financial aid letter for school. ( I applied late) I dont know if I want to start in the winter term. It will be really weird going back to school. I am 31. I am also thinking how much it sucks that no one wants to hire me. In part because I have been a stay at home mom for 6 years and I also have a set schedule I need to work. I mean I applied for a job that I have 7 years of expereince(sp) for and they didnt even call. How crazy is that.

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I am also thinking how much it sucks that no one wants to hire me. I mean I applied for a job that I have 7 years of expereince(sp) for and they didnt even call. How crazy is that.

This is why I have resorted to exploiting my body and face once more, just to stay afloat. There are NO jobs, and the ones that are out there, they want someone with milk still on their breath-- whom they can mould into what they want. Hell, I don't know WHAT some of these employers are looking for-- had one of them hired ME, they wouldn't have had to put out another ad or sign a week later. I take their poor choices as a sign of poor management, so I won't apply to those companies again.

So, I made my OWN job. I am my OWN boss. Business can be slow at times, and frustrating when it's fast, but I always manage to pay for the shit I need somehow. I make the money off the people who HAVE good jobs. There ARE ways of getting the fortune to trickle down, if you put your mind to it.

I'm scratching the interview at the hot dog stand. The guy sounds like a weirdo; he doesn't even do the interview in a store, he does them at Wendy's across the street (???). Also, this is not the first time I've seen this ad on CL, he seems to post at least once a month-- which says to me, it's not worth my time. There are obviously management issues. I tend to sneer at anyplace with a high turn-over. Every time I've taken a job at a place like that, I wanted to murder someone within the week (I have little patience for a badly-run business). There is NO money worth that feeling of aggravation. I AM however, going to check out that little dive bar which is hiring. I tend to make GREAT money at those sorts of places. I also have experience at quite a few well known establishments, which would help to get me in there.

And THESE are my thoughts at this current moment.

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Thinking about getting my ass in gear to go pick up money orders to pay bills with. Yay. Not much to motivate me, there. I just have to keep in mind it will be one less worry when it's DONE.

Thinking about FOOD. Cripes, I'm starving! Maybe I'll hit Taco Bell or something while I'm out.

Thinking about how stinky my cats' litterbox becomes overnight at times. I think they hold shitting conventions while I sleep. Note to self: buy kitty litter while out.

Thinking about booking for the rest of the week. Gawd, I dread it, but we gotta eat and pay bills.

Thinking about how fall is right around the corner, and natural gas prices are supposed to be SKY-NORMOUS this year. I don't know how I'm gonna make it through-- my gas was an arm and a leg LAST year. Each month of winter cost me at least $130 dollars. It makes me wonder where the money trees grow, as it's almost autumn, and time for leaves and fruit to fall. *straightface* It's an absolute travesty how everyday needful things have become high-priced luxuries.

These are my current thoughts, jumbled as they may be.

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