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New car-related words and definitions


Msterbeau

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Brewnesia n. The condition of forgetting your coffee on the

roof of your car and driving off.

Carligraphy n. The art of writing on a dirty vehicle with

your finger.

Careoke v. To sing while motoring.

Cartesy n. The generous act of letting another car merge

into your lane.

Cashtray n. A car ashtray that's been repurposed as a coin

holder.

Clutchuoso n. A talented driver of a car with a standard

transmission. A rare breed.

Commutant n. Someone with a poor shave or makeup job as a

result of doing it on the way to work.

Disflooriented adj. Feeling of confusion when you can't

remember what level of the parking garage you're on.

Driversion n. Something that distracts a driver, such as a

cell phone conversation, DVD player or PDA.

E-cellerate v. To drive with the emergency brake on.

Enigmark n. A dent or paint scrape to which the origin is

unknown.

Farking Spot n. A seemingly open parking space that when

you get closer, you discover a small car parked there.

Flashole n. That person who flashes you with their brights

even though your brights aren't on.

Freeter n. A parking meter that already has time on it.

Foodabuster v. To speak slowly at the drive through window

so you can stall for time while still making your decision.

Insectiride n. A vehicle that has just killed an

extraordinary amount of bugs on its grille or windshield.

Interstucktion n. When multiple cars arrive at a stop sign

and no one goes.

Notmeflex n. The involuntary act of hitting the brakes when

you see a cop regardless of whether you're speeding or not.

Obstacar n. A slow moving vehicle that keeps you from going

your desired speed.

Poorlainoia n. The fear that you're always in the slowest

moving lane.

Potholevard n. A street with a large number of potholes on

it.

Premature Co-pilotation v. To call "shotgun" too early.

Prohibiturn n. To perform a driving move you think might be

illegal, yet you do it anyway.

Roverdrive v. The dangerous act of motoring with a dog on

your lap. Not recommended.

Rockupied adj. When you're physically unable to leave the

car until a song is over.

Seatus quo n. The normal position of your car seat. May be

upset by valets and other new drivers.

Shoegitive n. The mysterious sneaker you always see on the

side of the road.

Spalker n. A vehicle that follows shoppers in the parking

lot in hopes of getting their spot.

Spumped adj. Condition that occurs when you get to the gas

station but can't remember what side your tank is on.

Waltermonstale n. A bumper sticker for a presidential

election long since passed.

Wiperfection n. The ideal wiper speed for the amount of

rain currently falling.

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Cashtray n. A car ashtray that's been repurposed as a coin

holder.

Haha. Every car I have owned. :)

Enigmark n. A dent or paint scrape to which the origin is

unknown.

All the flipping time!!! Luckily I can usually buff out the scrapes and scratches pretty quickly.

Farking Spot n. A seemingly open parking space that when

you get closer, you discover a small car parked there.

There's too many Smart cars around here.

Flashole n. That person who flashes you with their brights

even though your brights aren't on.

I used to think I ran into these all the time ... then I realized this year they are telling me one of two things -- they saw a cop or they saw a deer. I drive in a lot of rural areas.

Notmeflex n. The involuntary act of hitting the brakes when

you see a cop regardless of whether you're speeding or not.

Don't hit your brakes!!! It draws the cops attention! Gear it down if you have a stick or an auto-stick. If your talented enough to know how to gear down an automatic, do it!!! More likely than not, it will get you out of a speeding ticket.

Roverdrive v. The dangerous act of motoring with a dog on

your lap. Not recommended.

Guilty. I have tiny dogs. And my car insurance covers my dogs, which I thought was really neat! Usually they will stay in the passenger seat, but sometimes they sneak over.

Seatus quo n. The normal position of your car seat. May be

upset by valets and other new drivers.

I'm shorter than Phee ... I can never reach my pedals if I get in my car after he's taken it somewhere.

Spumped adj. Condition that occurs when you get to the gas

station but can't remember what side your tank is on.

Three cars, two different sides ... happens all the time. If I'm driving the van, never fails, I pull on the wrong side (that my Mazda is on).

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I am practicing to be a clutchuoso. Unfortunately, I still need more work.

A LOT more.

There should also be a term for the frustration manual transmission drivers must endure when they get caught in stop-and-go traffic. It's the most annoying thing on the road, next to other drivers.

Clutchstration.

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mmm i miss the lil contour my roomie had, lil manual drive beasty.

manuals are better on gas, too. i wanted to convert my rear wheel drive tbird to a manual, but it's slowly dying, not worth the money now :(

you need to try a decent car than the contour/mondeo. i find the suspension on them far to sloppy

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