dumbest thing you've done for love

[paradox]

do i have to pick one?

file me in with tom cat, der nister et al.

edit: also, i agree with der nister. love or the illusion of love is all the same. its the emotion you feel at the moment of action. you cant go back and take it back. you WERE INDEED in love with that person (which is why it was a dumb thing to do for love) even if they did not reciprocate in the fashion you desire now or desired then, or both.

its "dumb things youve done for love" not "dumb things youve done for someone who loves/ed you."

no thread needed.

[TomCat]

do i have to pick one?

file me in with tom cat, der nister et al.

edit: also, i agree with der nister. love or the illusion of love is all the same. its the emotion you feel at the moment of action. you cant go back and take it back. you WERE INDEED in love with that person (which is why it was a dumb thing to do for love) even if they did not reciprocate in the fashion you desire now or desired then, or both.

its "dumb things youve done for love" not "dumb things youve done for someone who loves/ed you."

no thread needed.

yeah, I tend to agree, when someone lies to you incessantly, you feel the love...but it's just with the facade. So in the end, all you got is an empty bank account, and some wedding photos that don't mean shit.

[torn asunder]

not to be flippant, but - believed in it!?

[TomCat]

not to be flippant, but - believed in it!?

yeah, because what I put into it was real. Eventually, she couldn't keep up the work on her end and it was cataclysmic.

[Gauge]

gave up my dreams, put my life on hold, and . . . well thats as far as im going to go. . .

[paradox]

i dont think (and i may be wrong) that to start with there is no love. while it may be that some people are in it for their own advancement, i will wager that your average DGNer is no deep-pockets or big star. there isnt exactly alot to be gained is my point.

i also think that it would be hard to pin-point exactly where it "stops." we all might have our own moment of clairity or realization, but thats more realizing consciously what you have felt and/or known unconsciously.

or we may have been deliberately making ourselves believe that love was still in the picture for any number of reasons great and small.

it may even be that the other person still feels they love you, hard as that is to believe. or that you were the one to quit first.

emotions are not logical or rational. they really arent even quantitative. its more a question of quality, but not just of the single emotion but of your whole life surrounding it. so we might be better saying that, looking back, it was a poor form of love compared to now, or before, or to our ideal. its hard to objectively say that there was no love. it may be that this was the case at the ultimate end of the relationship (wherever you place that), but likely not throughout the entire thing.

the real trick is deciding when YOU also stopped loving, but before you stopped trying to, or pretending. then of course theres the question of the other parties perspective, and the objectivity of it, as well as our own.

[TomCat]

i dont think (and i may be wrong) that to start with there is no love. while it may be that some people are in it for their own advancement, i will wager that your average DGNer is no deep-pockets or big star. there isnt exactly alot to be gained is my point.

i also think that it would be hard to pin-point exactly where it "stops." we all might have our own moment of clairity or realization, but thats more realizing consciously what you have felt and/or known unconsciously.

or we may have been deliberately making ourselves believe that love was still in the picture for any number of reasons great and small.

it may even be that the other person still feels they love you, hard as that is to believe. or that you were the one to quit first.

emotions are not logical or rational. they really arent even quantitative. its more a question of quality, but not just of the single emotion but of your whole life surrounding it. so we might be better saying that, looking back, it was a poor form of love compared to now, or before, or to our ideal. its hard to objectively say that there was no love. it may be that this was the case at the ultimate end of the relationship (wherever you place that), but likely not throughout the entire thing.

the real trick is deciding when YOU also stopped loving, but before you stopped trying to, or pretending. then of course theres the question of the other parties perspective, and the objectivity of it, as well as our own.

I think I stopped loving when I found the M-18 cClaymores rigged in my bedroom and the 26 different love letters hidden in her purse, e-mail, and a duct in my basement...dated from the day before I found them to a week before...from three different guys...yeah, it was about then.

[paradox]

i suppose thats when its stops being phiolsophical

[TitsMcGee]

I duped myself into believe that my ex, who was married, loved me and would leave his wife for me. I was dumb enough to think he was telling the truth when he said that he'd love me forever...what a joke.

[Homicidalheathen]

Oh, jeez, Jeff. You and me both. Only I got to keep my mother.

Typical day: I'd go to work like a responsible human being. He'd write bad checks all over town, f*ck underage girls, a couple of trannies, run up such a high coke tab that people would follow us around town trying to kidnap him, someone would get into a fight in our living room and try to throw the other out of our third story apartment window into the parking lot below over $30, I'd lock myself in the closet with the phone and threaten to call the police and somehow, I deluded myself into believing it was the closest thing to love that I ever would get.

And then, one night, trudging home alone in 18 inches of snow, clarity. Effin' clarity. It was over by morning. Hellz yeah.

And it only cost me $40,000 and 2 1/2 years. School of hard knocks--only one I graduated, know what I mean?

I think we dated the same ex, no chance he was in AZ was he? Guess not what with the snow and all...but other than that...the same.

Letting him move in, was my biggest mistake.

[thewhiterecluse]

I sold my left testicle... She said if I loved her enough I would give up one to buy her a diamond ring, then she pawned it...

[StormKnight (1)]

Drive 3 hours after an all night evaluation, only to be dumped upon arrival.

[Der Nister]

I sold my left testicle... She said if I loved her enough I would give up one to buy her a diamond ring, then she pawned it...

She pawned your left testicle?????????????????????????????

[thewhiterecluse]

She pawned your left testicle?????????????????????????????

Yeah man, it was some bullshit! I got called the uniballer for the longest until I could find the right pawn shop and have it stitched back on!

[taysteewonderbunny]

Oh whew! You got it back. I was going to buy you neuticals.

[Simon Bar Sinister]

Oh whew! You got it back. I was going to buy you neuticals.

Thanks - I couldn't remember the name for those!

[thewhiterecluse]

Luckily I didn't have to have someone else's stitched on. Then if I happened to get the chick pregnant I would have wondered why the kid didn't look like me because with my luck his sperm would have won the race.

[SkYFiRe]

driving my "replacement" home from the airport in my ex's car and being stuck laying in the basement for lack of transportation as he take the spot upstairs in her bed where i had just been sleeping the night before being reasured that he was a friend from europe who wanted to move to the U.S and needed a place to stay for a little while and that he would stay in the basement.

[sexslavetrainer]

Hmmm... So many dumb things to choose from... Lets go with the top 3...

#1 Dropped out of HS and moved to Nebraska for a cheating bitch who never thought I'd really move there for her.

#2 Tried to fuck my girlfriends best friend when she wasn't exactly legal then had to lie my ass off to stay out of jail.

#3 Continued to spoil and give everything to a girl who rejected me multiple times just because I liked her.

[JaneDead]

everything i EVER did involving my 2 exes is/was THE dumbest thing i ever did for love. EVERYTHING.

they didn't deserve me not even for a minute.

there's too much and it's all too personal so i will leave it at that

[Rev.Reverence]

everything i EVER did involving my 2 exes is/was THE dumbest thing i ever did for love. EVERYTHING.

they didn't deserve me not even for a minute.

there's too much and it's all too personal so i will leave it at that

.....I know the half of it!

[Homicidalheathen]

Love makes you crazy...

article from Dan Savage...

What do you do when you meet the human equivalent of heroin?

I've been messing around with a dominant guy for about a year now. It is by far the most unhealthy "relationship" I've ever been in. First, I have no desire to be with this guy in any way besides fucking around with him. I do not respect him or like him. Our fucking around consists of me giving him head and him slapping me around. Pathetic, huh? I've tried to quit seeing him many times. I changed my phone number, but he just started showing up at my house. When I started dating someone, he refused to quit seeing me. Prior to the relationship, I let him use my house keys one night. He made copies of them without my knowing, and while I was in a relationship, he came to my house one day and pretty much forced me to give him head. I was terrified after that. I changed my locks. I told him that if he ever came over again I would call the cops. Still, despite my having a boyfriend and me ignoring him for months, he still called, e-mailed, and stopped by. Since then, my boyfriend and I broke up, and his stalking has escalated. The few people who know the details about our "relationship" have begged me to get a restraining order. The problem? What he does (the dominating, not the stalking) still turns me on. Even after the "attack," even during my relationship, when I masturbate, I think of him. I'm scared of him and turned on by him. I would go to a psychiatrist, but I'm very embarrassed by it. I'm a very normal person, healthy in many ways. So what gives? He's a very attractive guy and he can get many girls—why won't he leave me alone? Why can't I stop myself from seeing him?

I'm a female in my mid 20s. Completely normal, except for this dark secret.

Anonymous

It's fun to have a dark secret—lots of "completely normal" people do. But you can have your dark secrets, A, and all the kinky sex you like, with someone else. There are other guys out there who can do for you exactly what this guy does for you now—and it can be a guy you like, a guy you respect, a guy who respects you enough not to take advantage of your submissive streak.

You have to put a stop to this. Move, change those locks again, get that restraining order, and stop seeing this guy once and for all. He may be hot, what he does to you may be hot, but the stalker stuff—to say nothing of the rapist stuff—is shit frosting on an otherwise hot piece of cake. Stop swallowing it before you get seriously hurt.

And you know what, A? You can go right on masturbating about your experiences with this guy without interpreting that as evidence that you're somehow obligated to continue servicing him. Lots of people have fond memories of sexual experiences with sociopaths, and masturbate to (or is it about?) those memories, but only an idiot keeps fucking around with a sociopath. And this guy won't loom quite so largely in your erotic imagination, A, once you've found someone else to do this stuff with.

----------------------------------------

I thought it befitting and helpful, in fact...I cut this one out and put it in my journal. I don't just put my writings in it but others...find it helpful to look back and see how far I have come...or not...at times.

[TomCat]

everything i EVER did involving my 2 exes is/was THE dumbest thing i ever did for love. EVERYTHING.

they didn't deserve me not even for a minute.

there's too much and it's all too personal so i will leave it at that

You're so right JaneDead...not even a second of it. You deserved/deserve so much better.

I know, I've been through the ringer, but I came out for the better on the other side, just as you will.

[GothicRavenGoddess (3)]

lets see...

almost got married at 16

almost was a mom at 17

took three years to admit that I still loved my ex from when I was 16.... and then it was too late.. all because I was convinced I loved someone else..

stayed in a relationship 2 years too long (it was two year's long)

almost killed myself when i lost a child at 19 (different guy than the one from 17)

stayed with a guy, even though I KNEW he wasn't responsible, and ultimately, i lost everything and had to move here...

almost got married to a loser who made up a girl to get out of the relationship....

now I'm all squared away... my room mate says that TheLordOfSins is the best thing that's happened to me... given my very long running track of outstanding boyfriends... *rolls eyes* and I tend to agree.

[Oh_My_Goth]

I don't do dumb shit for love.....

I have always had to much respect for Meself to degrade myself for love.