What Are You Thinking?

[Trene4000]

This is so frustrating. I am trying my best to help but nothing makes sense. I have no idea what to do. I only seem to be able to assist. I've tried to do things on my own but none of it makes sense. There is nothing connecting. How can I help when I need someone to tell me what to do? It is taking everything in me to not blank out. It is so hard tracking what exactly is going on. This is outside my experiences so I have nothing to fall back on. I am only good for helping.

Edited June 9, 2015 by Trene4000
own not on

[TronRP]

If guys scream like that, and ONLY guys scream like that, at what point is that girly...

That would mean you are saying girls scream like guys O.o

[TronRP]

  On 6/9/2015 at 3:04 PM, Trene4000 said:

This is so frustrating. I am trying my best to help but nothing makes sense. I have no idea what to do. I only seem to be able to assist. I've tried to do things on my own but none of it makes sense. There is nothing connecting. How can I help when I need someone to tell me what to do? It is taking everything in me to not blank out. It is so hard tracking what exactly is going on. This is outside my experiences so I have nothing to fall back on. I am only good for helping.

​​No worries, just keep doing what you're doing...my brain keeps forgetting to write the stuff down and I know you have me back without me having to ask...you're doing great.​

[TronRP]

  On 6/9/2015 at 12:49 AM, kat said:

Tron and Trene, that's what I'm thinking about. Prayers to you and you're family. You guys are in my mind and heart all the time.

​Thanks so much kat. Truly appreciated. I must admit, sometime I forget just how sick she is when I hear she had pork ribs for dinner.. 

My brother cuts them up and she eats them with a toothpick...so cute.

[creatureofthenyte]

Very much looking forward to the new album from Ghost.

[kat (1)]

  On 6/9/2015 at 6:31 PM, TronRP said:

​Thanks so much kat. Truly appreciated. I must admit, sometime I forget just how sick she is when I hear she had pork ribs for dinner.. 

My brother cuts them up and she eats them with a toothpick...so cute.

Aww, that's sweet to hear. She sounds so strong<3

[kat (1)]

Man, oh, man...here we go..

Damn it all to hell!!!

[Trene4000]

Why am I helpful to everyone but that one? I can't help being overwhelmed. Stop snapping at me just because I am not moving as fast as you want me to. I am trying as hard as I can. Some things just aren't that simple to me. I am better at helping. 

 

My brain is full of cotton.

[Trene4000]

I understand. That one is constantly driving the self of that one and sometimes lacks patience for slower processors like me when my brain is overwhelmed. I am still going to try.

[Trene4000]

Dogs watching me eat waffles.

[kat (1)]

Orange Is The New Black, June 12th! Be there!

[TronRP]

  On 6/10/2015 at 1:41 AM, Trene4000 said:

Why am I helpful to everyone but that one? I can't help being overwhelmed. Stop snapping at me just because I am not moving as fast as you want me to. I am trying as hard as I can. Some things just aren't that simple to me. I am better at helping. 

 

My brain is full of cotton.

​

  On 6/10/2015 at 2:12 AM, Trene4000 said:

I understand. That one is constantly driving the self of that one and sometimes lacks patience for slower processors like me when my brain is overwhelmed. I am still going to try.

​I get the feeling that I'm "That one", but I didn't think your head was so full of cotton that you didn't hear me complimenting your efforts with EVERY statement I made. I didn't realize you didn't hear me constantly apologizing for my attitude because I had been cutting grass since 3 pm and then had to come to my place and wash clothes and then went to the HomeHouse to check in and had to clean the kitchen, the stairs to the basement, fold all the linen and towels that were used and those that were thrown in the rocking chair. Then I had to straighten up the dining room, rescue the gas line from the deliveries that were made, consolidate all the supplies and separate the trash from the construction debris right before the toilet request was made.

I apologized to you because I needed to jog your memory as to what transpired after the social worker and the nurses because I was trying to limit my sun exposure to heat ratio so I ended up checking out mid consultation. I even told you to your face that I knew you were fading fast, but I needed you because I wasn't there when everything took place as far as what procedures were to happen at what time while the toilet request was still in play.

After I apologized to you the 30th time (I know, I counted because I felt like I was getting on your nerves) I verbally told myself to shut up and handle what I could. I kept telling you that I wasn't complaining I just needed a little assistance at that time. 3.5 hours on a rider, 2 hours of cleaning and doing laundry and all on an empty stomach was starting to get to me after I had spent 3 hours shopping and 2 more hours unloading the truck and putting everything away at two houses (I was too exhausted to unload for the third house, I'll take care of that later on today) and I knew I wouldn't be able to get any food until after the toilet request was handled. 

In the future, I will try to be more courteous and cautious of when I speak to you (even though I told you I knew you were tired and stressed out due to all the questions you guys had to answer this morning).  I guess I make it look easy. I can go 48 hours straight hosting, shopping, cleaning, prepping areas, doing security checks, meeting with service providers, doing laundry and handling accounts before exhaustion starts to catch up to me. Unfortunately, today was day 4 and I couldn't stop talking. I tried to be respectful of everyone's feelings and physical conditions because I know we were all out of it (and bro was hurt and trying to cover it up), but I see where that got me. So, I'm going to go silently internalize this and change the laundry now.

Jya ne, oyasumi, later...

[Trene4000]

If I could, I would slap up a false ceiling and several walls just to make it look finished. That way she sees a finished house and child services doesn't take away the kids stating unsafe living conditions since brother-man doesn't own a house. I'm just sayin'.

[Trene4000]

Look at the timestamp.

[Trene4000]

Journalism as it happens versus journalism after the fact. There's always bound to be discrepancies. That's why you interview the people right then and there. Recall isn't always perfect hours later. The exception being a photographic memory.

 

She wants to be a journalist. I wonder if she can keep the pace needed to be more than a gossip columnist? It would be cool if she could. She acts a little flaky right now but there's still room to grow.

 

One can dream.

[Trene4000]

I don't care.

[Trene4000]

Said my piece, now goodnight.

[TronRP]

I'm just laughing

[TronRP]

I think I'm seeing a lot of cat poop and human waste in my immediate future...

[TronRP]

I think time is moving too fast, I just closed my eyes 4 hours ago...

[TronRP]

I think I needed someone to talk to yesterday and it spilled into this morning.  My little sister keeps reminding me that we are all busy.  I understand the situation, I wasn't trying to make myself look more important than anyone.  I was swamped, everyone was swamped.  I wasn't allowed to verbally say too much because it was interfering with all the visitors.  I just wanted to make sure everything went smoothly because we are dealing with multiple people and items in such a limited space.  I can't help but think a few moves ahead.

Maybe I should just wait until things happen and handle it then so I don't come across like I'm whining. 

[Trene4000]

I am so glad that thunderstorm blew through this morning. It helped me fall into a deep, peaceful, dreamless sleep.

[TronRP]

I think I have finally figured out the perceived difference between Facebook and a privately monitored forum.  Facebook and all it's issues and invasions of privacy has convinced the public that these things are globally acceptable. A privately monitored forum gives it's members more of a "direct access" to where they feel the problem lies and therefore must be correctable.

[TronRP]

Hahaha...dookie...

[Trene4000]

UGH! I'M TIRED OF PULLING 13 HOUR SHIFTS! When do I get a break?