What Are You Thinking?

[Michael8402]

I can't make it tomorrow.  Lol.  I have that stupid work thing I have to go to from 3pm till after close.  I will probably be stuck there until after midnight again.  I don't want to adult tomorrow.

[kat (1)]

Well we can arrange a DGN coffee and stuff meet up..maybe others like Tron and Troy will come, whoever can make it.. Since we're all over the place we have to find a spot convenient for all too.

Edited August 29, 2015 by kat

[TronRP]

Well we can arrange a DGN coffee and stuff meet up..maybe others like Tron and Troy will come, whoever can make it.. Since we're all over the place we have to find a spot convenient for all too.

So when and where are we talking? If it's tomorrow, I could possibly make it after the kids get registered for school and dropped off at practice. Come to think of it, first of all, I have to make sure I even have a functioning vehicle to use since my alternator belt blew out Thursday and my mother's car hasn't moved in months. Chances are, I might be walking the kids to registration...

[kat (1)]

So when and where are we talking? If it's tomorrow, I could possibly make it after the kids get registered for school and dropped off at practice. Come to think of it, first of all, I have to make sure I even have a functioning vehicle to use since my alternator belt blew out Thursday and my mother's car hasn't moved in months. Chances are, I might be walking the kids to registration...

I can't make it tomorrow.  Lol.  I have that stupid work thing I have to go to from 3pm till after close.  I will probably be stuck there until after midnight again.  I don't want to adult tomorrow.

they register on Saturday? Wow, that school don't play.

[kat (1)]

I'm voting for the person who bans the" I voted today sticker"

Reminds me of rewarding children. 

[Michael8402]

Well we can arrange a DGN coffee and stuff meet up..maybe others like Tron and Troy will come, whoever can make it.. Since we're all over the place we have to find a spot convenient for all too.

I work mostly evenings and may not get many days off for awhile.  I am currently the only dishwasher at work.  Mondays are the most likely days for me to have off work.  I will try to meet up for coffee sometime if I can get the time off.  Just let me know where and when.  I am in Novi but I have a gps on my phone so I can find out how to get places.

[kat (1)]

What I rrreeaallly wanna do is,

Pack up beat up crashed up rust bucket

Fill up gas tank and drive til I can't drive nomore and tell Michigan to finally kiss my fat fuqing a$$! 

Start alll over, a clean slate. An actual real attempt at a being a grown up this time and no more bullshit.. I can do this.

[kat (1)]

Is the B at the top of the text box pushed in? If so push it again and hopefully it fixes it.

Edited August 29, 2015 by kat

[kat (1)]

I work mostly evenings and may not get many days off for awhile.  I am currently the only dishwasher at work.  Mondays are the most likely days for me to have off work.  I will try to meet up for coffee sometime if I can get the time off.  Just let me know where and when.  I am in Novi but I have a gps on my phone so I can find out how to get places.

k..we will all set something up, Tron sounds interested, I am working this Monday but typically Monday is my off day. I don't think I am going to do the OT I was offered prior to the PTSD dx I want to take care of health and not overload myself with social work drama lmao

[kat (1)]

Sonic Fries suck

I should have ate my burger prior to turning Homicide Hunter on this woman feed this man his eye balls. Ewwww

[kat (1)]

I am not worthless just bloated from a overindulge in sweets, fast food and pms combo..I love being female though cause, well, sex and make-up and my leg's and hips and other awesome things. I don't know if my nerves are just uber sensitive like in my 30s or what but... I should go to sleep.

Edited August 30, 2015 by kat

[TronRP]

I think I had better calm down. I might be coming across as paranoid around the HomeHouse. My mother set it up where everything would fall on my shoulders and currently the pattern is continuing to a certain degree. Others are stepping in to assist, but it appears things can go only so far and I still end up picking up the slack. 

It's like I am brainwashed to automatically jump in and take on everything instead of letting it play out to whatever conclusion may come. I have definitely been well trained.

[kat (1)]

I need someone I can cuddle up with and take a nap.

[kat (1)]

I just got thee best cheesiest pick up line fed to me and the dude knew it was cheesy so its fine cause it made me laugh: it went;

Baby, your name must be Google, cause you got all I'm searching for!

 it did kinda pick my mood up though. Lol

Edited August 30, 2015 by kat

[kat (1)]

Ok yea, you're a doctor and you are hanging out on meet me, begging fat chicks like myself to hang out with you, ooookkkkaayyy..more like, doctor Lecter, you gave me your address! Omg, dude, all this sounds like shit no way am I doing that, heellll naaaww.

[kat (1)]

I think I have reached enlightenment as I have figured out the meaning of life is that there is no-thing to find out, all you had at the moment you arrived in this world is all you take in the end. Everything else is just a series of lessons in the purpose of our being brought here to suffer. Once we understand that we must suffer only than will the suffering become zen and we will reach Nirvana and The Lake of Fire won't burn so bad..

Kat, 2015

[kat (1)]

A few more things before I go to bed, I could never leave myself to die where my children could find me or discover me, I know I am in a bad place emotionally right now, unfortunately, and this coming from a mental health professional themselve Michigan has terrible mental health services, big reason I hate working in this state, and lastly,

Yes, Dan hurt me.. Not because of breaking my heart more because of all the shit that transpired, because I knew he and I were not on the same level, he hurt me because of the lies and disrespect, and making promising to my daughter saying he'd take her to Chicago Us, obviously not her alone, but you NEVER, EVER, mess with a person's kid. I can't believe he bonded with my son, I can't believe he would sit with him and watch cartoons.. It was cute..it meant something. I knew that he had a problem when my ex husband politely shoke his hand and introduced himself.. Like adults do! When Dan acted like a spoiled 4 year old and pursed his lips and later said he wanted to kick my ex husband ass...I'm like, ummm for..what, being nice to you? Duh Kat

[TronRP]

No fate, but what we make.

Terminator 2, 1991

 

Been feeling it lately...

[TronRP]

I just got thee best cheesiest pick up line fed to me and the dude knew it was cheesy so its fine cause it made me laugh: it went;

Baby, your name must be Google, cause you got all I'm searching for!

 it did kinda pick my mood up though. Lol

OMG!!! I couldn't believe this when I just read it.

What was he, 12. I wonder how long it took him to practice that line before he got up enough nerve to use it the first time...

[Michael8402]

I just got thee best cheesiest pick up line fed to me and the dude knew it was cheesy so its fine cause it made me laugh: it went;

Baby, your name must be Google, cause you got all I'm searching for!

 it did kinda pick my mood up though. Lol

I still prefer the old but good

"Is there a mirror in your pocket?  Because I can see myself in your pants." Or "Are you tired?  Because you have been running through my mind all day."

My friends and I used to play the cheesy pick up line game with each other.  It was always fun.

[TronRP]

I don't think I can do this. Or maybe I just don't know that I can do this.

The level of responsibility is starting to compound in my head and I'm beginning to lose focus on what is important. I think I'm becoming nervous and afraid of what this particular path of the future is about to bring and I just want to curl up and vacate the world for a while...a luxury I do not have.

I've just got to keep saying good morning for the next 9 years and I would have taken care of a major part of this responsibility.

[TronRP]

OMG...Menopause...

[kat (1)]

I still prefer the old but good

"Is there a mirror in your pocket?  Because I can see myself in your pants." Or "Are you tired?  Because you have been running through my mind all day."

My friends and I used to play the cheesy pick up line game with each other.  It was always fun.

OMG!!! I couldn't believe this when I just read it.

What was he, 12. I wonder how long it took him to practice that line before he got up enough nerve to use it the first time...

lol, funny. Pickup lines.. I remember some pretty bad ones, like the running through my mind one..hehe.

Anyway, I have alot of work to do on myself right now. I am not healthy and make choices based on my negative feelings due to my history. I am at a place in life were it can not be like this anymore. I need alot of healing and this is the perfect time.

[kat (1)]

Today was a fail and I will be off for months, if I ever get back to the point where I can. 

So I had to go to the damn ER I promised I would and the nurse did a pregnancy test and said, nope, I'm sorry.. I said um that's okay, (like it was weird) I said I don't need a baby right now, she goes

Oh, but it would put you in the right direction! 

Why do people think that is a good idea?

Here I am there for Anxiety half crying and wtf.

[kat (1)]

And the doctor she is asking me why I am so sad, she's asking me to show her my injuries, so I pulled back my hair and she said that is nothing, your not disfigured, that's barely noticeable, why are you feeling this way....she said were you afraid?

Ok, so I think back to nearly six years ago when I got hit by a guy, while my kids where in the car, that accident totaled my car..the kids and everyone was fine but it was pretty bad, we were lucky.. And I was driving home from work.. I was scared and it caused a hella shit storm in my life but, there was no PTSD, no damage to anyone physically and I was alert the entire time

This time, the fear was the actual finding myself in my car waking, confused.. Thinking to myself.. "People do not sleep while driving cars, however, I am in my car asleep, how did this happen, I couldn't remember it happening, as I'm trying to get control I hit the brakes on gravel it made it feel like I was speeding, I remember screaming trying to get the wheel back in my graces but when I saw where I was going towards the car felt like I flew and I remember a drop, which is why the inside was so damaged. Yes doctor I was afraid.