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What Are You Thinking?


StormKnight

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I'm so tired, emotionally exhausted. I am just fed the fuck up. I don't want this. I have to get the hell out. I am sick of it, same old crap

 I swear to god I am going to leave it all behind. I didn't do what I set out to and not following my gut has proven my instincts have to be right, I fell off the path I was supposed to be on and I suffered as a result.

Edited by kat
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I get to finally cook my turkey tomorrow.  I made a Sweet Potato salad with a fresh ginger honey aoli.  My turkey is in the fridge in a brine with parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme.  I was going to make a turkey stock using the neck and gizzards but I forgot to get it started.  I will have to start it first thing tomorrow.  I still have to make my stuffing and redskin mashed potatoes.  Hopefully my stock turns out good so I can make an awesome gravy.  I have a chef friend who is coming over to join us and he is going to make a side.  I still don't know what he is making yet.  I think it will go well. 

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I am totally fed up with all of these services. Fingerhut can kiss my Aunt Sally Sue for all I care right now. Sure I will have time to calm down later, but to blatantly close an account without notification while someone is trying to make arrangements to become the account holder is just wrong which was confirmed by the second rep I spoke with. That was not the first rep's job, that was for customer service to handle. Now our mother's account is closed and gone along with all the history that was related to it. So to try to straighten things out, I call customer service which was supposed to open at 8am CT. I even gave them an extra 18 minutes. Well, their office hours are 7am to 8pm CT and the office is currently closed and I'm told to call back during regular business hours. WHATEVER!!!

...I am too upset for words right now. I hate everything... :dry:

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Seriously I am worried about the guy who lives across the hall. He hasn't been around in a month now, his last fb post was on Nov 4, his truck is gone, the dog is gone, but the mail is there and the mail lady asked me about him and said he hasn't gotten his mail since about the time that t noticed his last fb post. He has two business cards on his door and it appears his people from the VA are looking for him. I talked to the landlord and he didn't know anything about it until I said something. He speculated that Brian is in jail but I think it is something else. I know he has episodes were he likes to binge on crack somewhere, some crackhouse I guess he goes to. I fear he may have ODed somewhere. I mean like the mail lady said, he would have had his mail held if he were leaving town, he was training pups as therapy dogs and just took on a new work project that he has been in good spirits about, for awhile he was depressed and isolating and took on these projects to get him out of the funk. He mentioned a woman in Florida and told me he may be bringing her to Michigan to live with him and asked if he did take the trip would I take care of his puppy while he was gone and that was the plan but than I seen him after he talked about the date he was going and he said no, the situation with the woman fell through and he had this look on his face like there was drama surrounding it and he didn't have time to get into it cause be was leaving for work but he acted like he would talk to e later and that is the last I seen or heard from him. I am really worried. I don't think he has family around so who else is going to look out for him?

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I want to do something with other people. I feel isolated, why do I have to have coffee alone at 8 o'clock at night? Lol

We have to make plans to hang out sometime.  I don't have many friends here yet.  I have one coworker who has come to hang out at my place after work so far.  That's pretty much it.  lol.

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I had a great start to my day today and it put me in a great mood for the rest of my night at work.  My father surprised me by sending me a brand new ARC welder.  He also told me that a mask and gloves are on their way as well.  He doesn't really know much about tools and I felt like he never really showed an interest in me or things I was interested in as a kid.  I couldn't afford the welder but I was trying to save up for it.  It's amazing how much people can change and how wonderful it feels when someone does something great for you as a surprise.

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I should have never opened my door, these two guys were knocking at the guy across the hall and I thought maybe it was my neighbor and maybe he came home or Becky next door because she is getting concerned too. It was  two guy's they like start asking me who lives with me, do I want to party? What drugs do I like? Can I take them to get some shit, asking me if they can come in and hang out, asking me if I was by myself, asking for my number, looking in my apartment, I should have not opened the door.. It was weird now they know were I live. I am scared they will come back for real. I was caught off guard.

Edited by kat
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I open the door in yoga pants, a GI Joe shirt, no makeup, my hair a mess of frizz and waves of course I probably look like I wanted to get high. Wtf.

Yeah, I guess that could send mixed messages. 

Do you want to check to see if there is anything around here. I'm South East Detroit. That way I would know where you were...all the time...:hrhr:

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