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Aesthetic Police


Simon Bar Sinister

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first, a definition:

aesthetic: 1) a branch of philosophy dealing with the nature of beauty, art and taste, and with the cration and appreciation of beauty

2) a particular theory or conception of beauty or art; a particular taste for or approach to what is pleasing to the senses.

Now - on with the show. I've long held the belief that there should be an aesthetic police (I'd personally grant them shoot-to-kill authority, but that's just me) patrolling the land cleaning up aesthetic atrocities and, when necessary, punishing the offenders. Since there aren't, I can at least discuss them here with all of you. This thread isn't just for bashing, either - praise for contributions that better society are also appreciated. :)

short hair on women: is it hot in here, or is it just you? :wink

yellow cars: if you had to replace a car in a hurry and/or it was all you could afford, you get a free pass. If you had time and money to shop around and you bought one anyway, FUCK YOU!!!

any post-Dorothy Chandler Pavillion building by Frank Gehry: OK, you're a genius. Take a fucking vacation.

AMC Javelin: bold and understated at the same time, which is hard as hell to pull off. :thumbup:

wall-to-wall carpeting: may you roast in hell over a rayon-fueled fire.

SR-71 Blackbird: sex on two wings.

your turn

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yellow cars: if you had to replace a car in a hurry and/or it was all you could afford, you get a free pass. If you had time and money to shop around and you bought one anyway, FUCK YOU!!!

HEY! I did BOTH, okay? I was in a hurry AND still picked a yellow Cobalt...it was that or either white or blue :ralph :.

I am not allowing myself to say what I find aesthetically displeasing on here since it is something that applies to people and I have gotten in trouble for it in other threads, so I'll leave it at that.

Oh...but of late? Those STUPID fuzzy boots with the tacky fuzzy balls on them and the fur trim...AWFUL. Just when you thought nothing could out-awful crocs...I was proven wrong.

Edited by Chernobyl
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  • 6 months later...

this is too big for Fashion Violations, so I'm reviving this thread:

image-aHR0cDovL2JsdWJlZGJ1aWEwMTo4My9pLzczLzczMTQzRkE5QzdBMTkzODJBMjg2NTRGNkVERTZELkpQRw.JPG

Seriously, ladies - what the fuck is this?! I saw all kinds of different styles of these ankle-cuffs monstrosities at Movement 2010 this past weekend, and even the hottest women looked completely fucking retarded in them.

Dear gods...that is gods-awful. :X

If you are going to expose the toes, expose the ankles as well.

The Aesthetic Court deems these people guilty of bad taste. Their punishment shall be marched through the streets of Detroit wearing joke-catcher hairdos from the '80s, lime-green leisure suits from the '70s, and singing one-hit wonders songs from both decades at the tops of their lungs.

*gavel bangs*

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  • 3 weeks later...

Rusty trash bucket cars that are falling apart, puking out oil and antifreeze, and are in such physical and mechanical disrepair that they could never be restored yet have a set of $3,000+ 24 inch chrome rims whose worth eclipses the value of the car itself many times over... those have to go...

The vehicle should be sent right away to the nearest junkyard for crushing while the rims should be shackled to the owners ankles by chains and they should be forced to walk off into a desert dragging thier chrome burden through the dust, never to be seen again.

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Rusty trash bucket cars that are falling apart, puking out oil and antifreeze, and are in such physical and mechanical disrepair that they could never be restored yet have a set of $3,000+ 24 inch chrome rims whose worth eclipses the value of the car itself many times over... those have to go...

The vehicle should be sent right away to the nearest junkyard for crushing while the rims should be shackled to the owners ankles by chains and they should be forced to walk off into a desert dragging thier chrome burden through the dust, never to be seen again.

It makes me ashamed to be the car geek seeing those abominations in the eyes of god sputtering down the street. :X

Edited by StormKnight
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this is too big for Fashion Violations, so I'm reviving this thread:

image-aHR0cDovL2JsdWJlZGJ1aWEwMTo4My9pLzczLzczMTQzRkE5QzdBMTkzODJBMjg2NTRGNkVERTZELkpQRw.JPG

Seriously, ladies - what the fuck is this?! I saw all kinds of different styles of these ankle-cuffs monstrosities at Movement 2010 this past weekend, and even the hottest women looked completely fucking retarded in them.

:yucky::shock::ohmy::rofl::dry::mad::no:X:confused::rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Thats all I can say about that.

Girls with the their hair shaved but under their....hair?....Idk what thats called but it looks like they have hair but when they put it in a ponytail or somethign it's shaved underneath. I'm sorry but I HATE that on girls...guys don't even look good in it. No one does really.

Fat girls in corsets they can't actually close. Come on now. EVERYTHING isn't for EVERYBODY.

Ashy feet and gross toes in sandals. Pedicure please.

Dirty fingernails. PLEASE clean your nasty ass hands.

I have a million of these...I can keep going, but I won't...for now. Lol.

Edited by BloodCupcake
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  • 3 weeks later...

gold star time:

33ebca6cdd574422b940f090d3d6bef4.jpg

:heart:

Yeah, I concur. For those times I want to display certain skills. :evil:

I like the landscaping for that as well.

I dunno - home like that would have me feeling too exposed, too vulnerable.

But you would know where the burglar was that broke in from your bedroom a good ways away. Though there looks like there are some privacy areas.

Though you could tell instantly if the kids were doing something bad in the visible areas of the house.

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