Sometimes I wish

[asphyxian_doll]

Guess that is where we are different. If someone is being an asshole, I tell them flat out, friend or not. If they get pissed, thats there problem for not being able to take the truth. If a friendship is lost over something like that, it was not worth calling it a friendship in the first place. Probably why i have a small friend base, but id rather that then a bunch of people I have to tip toe around with opinions.

More than one member on this board has told you "flat out" that you were being an asshole.

Everything you apply to others, IS and will ALWAYS be applied to you.

If you're butthurt about how much negative attention it is getting you, well...maybe you should stop being an asshole.

You know, cause and effect maybe?

[asphyxian_doll]

The problem with looking at things as binary, is that in life there very rarely is black and white absolutes. And almost certainly not absolutes when it comes to people... I suppose I like having more ways of looking at things then black and white, us and them, right and wrong, good and evil, etc...

How does this relate to what we are talking about?

Lets say for instance, there was someone I really respected and thought was a good person who was acting like a total Asshole. I could just blast him with the "blunt option" or "not say anything" (That would be black and white choices) But I like this person, so instead of blasting him -> pissing him off -> him not listening to me because I am blasting him -> potentially damaging a good friendship, OR just not saying anything making it so his asshole behavior continues... I talk to him respectfully and truthfully, not saying stuff and calling him names to piss him off, but saying "I don't know if you are aware of this, but you have been acting really badly lately and it is coming off as asshole like, thought you might want to know because I doubt you mean to do it" (That would be the non black and white/grey area) It might A.) Get the point across without the interference of ME being abrasive and loosing the message. B.) He might value my friendship more for having the balls to tell him, but not be a jerk right back to him about it. C.) Everyone else might be happier because he stopped acting like an asshole.... where as if I had just been a prick right back to him friendship damaged, he is still acting like an asshole, and I look like one too now.

Exactly Phee, I agree with this whole heartedly.

If someone is being an asshole, being emotionally immature, toxic or abrasive themselves, I will tell them.

Depending on the person, I will tell them in such a way that cuts through the crap, and simply tell them.

I found many people such as drug addicts, anger holics and very selfish immature people just need to be treated with what I call "rebuking consistency"

You don't back down on someone who is simply intrusive.

If someone acts like a child, they need to be put in their place like one...

you don't see many dogs being tolerated when they bite, why should we tolerate someone with just as an abrasive and "biting" attitude?

But on the other hand, if its a friend...you can say things to them tactfully.

It really depends on the person, situation, and your mood.

I really have no time for bullshit, and I have low tolerance for certain behavior.

More specifically self absorbed, self righteous and self important grossly immature behavior.

I don't suffer either of those attributes...

So, in some ways, I can be blunt and clear cut...in others, I can be firm but friendly, but no matter what I cut through the shit.

But it is NEVER black and white.

[DJ Nocker]

More than one member on this board has told you "flat out" that you were being an asshole.

Everything you apply to others, IS and will ALWAYS be applied to you.

If you're butthurt about how much negative attention it is getting you, well...maybe you should stop being an asshole.

You know, cause and effect maybe?

Notice how im not whining to mods about it? I dont care if anyone on this site makes a stab at me, hell, most of the time im happy that someone responded to my post. I wasnt whining because people were angry at me, I was mad because I made a post that was put on invisible when others were not. but thats in the past. Seriously, if someone angered me on the internet THAT much, I would just put the user on ignore. Logical end to the problem imo...

[asphyxian_doll]

Notice how im not whining to mods about it? I dont care if anyone on this site makes a stab at me, hell, most of the time im happy that someone responded to my post. I wasnt whining because people were angry at me, I was mad because I made a post that was put on invisible when others were not. but thats in the past. Seriously, if someone angered me on the internet THAT much, I would just put the user on ignore. Logical end to the problem imo...

*spock face* Logical Indeed.

[DJ Nocker]

*spock face* Logical Indeed.

Nooooooo star trek, my worst enemy (is a star wars fan)

[phee]

Nooooooo star trek, my worst enemy (is a star wars fan)

*Goes back to reading Clive Barker and Lovecraft*

[asphyxian_doll]

Nooooooo star trek, my worst enemy (is a star wars fan)

(is a trek fan)

I win.

I don't have a whiny Aniken Baby head to deal with.