d:konstruct Posted April 17, 2010 Report Share Posted April 17, 2010 driving home, the air is still within the night, the sounds I feel as I watch young lovers meld into the shadows once again, in my isolation staring out again into darker corners in anticipation of someone but there is always nothing and though they paint a picture of me deep and blue raising me up to the sky, you'd think I'd fly but all it is in the end is but a dream to even be close to you I go home late at night once again to a bed that could be filled with love and life but the only thing I feel, is the cold turning away from me why do you turn away from me? Maybe what I seem to be is a fractured memory of what used to be someone whom you used to love and tonight I must try to find enjoyment in the sound of the early birds... the passing cars around me... the wind that moans it's melody please just sing me to sleep she will never really love me and I will always be to everyone a boy that people envy a heart forever broken I will continue to entertain the masses with my songs within but my soul is forever shattered and curse this longing, it doesn't matter if only your lips and the smell of your skin didn't matter if only your eyes so full of youth didn't matter tonight again, I know that I don't matter to you so my friends do you understand? if so then here's a kiss from me I'm going so much deeper so good night my love, good night.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
torn asunder Posted April 17, 2010 Report Share Posted April 17, 2010 i like the ideas in this, but i'm a meter kind of guy, and i had trouble following the rhythm of the piece - wish i could here the beat/tempo that was in your head when you penned it! that being said, i do really like it. nice work! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
d:konstruct Posted April 18, 2010 Author Report Share Posted April 18, 2010 Normally, I do stuff with meter but this was in a sense free form due to the chaos in my head last night:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
torn asunder Posted April 18, 2010 Report Share Posted April 18, 2010 Normally, I do stuff with meter but this was in a sense free form due to the chaos in my head last night:) i see - very cool! it's a failing of mine to connect with free verse, but i can appreciate it. i wish i was able to write in free verse! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prick Posted April 18, 2010 Report Share Posted April 18, 2010 Very nice Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
d:konstruct Posted April 19, 2010 Author Report Share Posted April 19, 2010 thank you so much Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now