funny (weird) local laws

[Simon Bar Sinister]

http://www.freep.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20100727/NEWS05/7270354/1322/Weird-rules-still-on-the-books-in-metro-Detroit&template=fullarticle

[Darkmatter]

Man someone needs to clean all that old shit up. I mean c'mon. If my woman and I want to be slutty and do nasty things to other couples we can go to jail? WTF? According to this I break the law EVERYDAY.

• Have indecent sex.

• Seduce an unmarried woman.

• Have promiscuous sex.

• Loiter in the morgue.(just kidding)

• Commit adultery. (My girlfriend is still legally married)

• Flip the middle finger or use obscene language.

• Swear by the name "God," "Jesus Christ" or "the Holy Ghost." (Jesus fuck that's a stupid law and unconstitutional)

• Allow immoral, suggestive or freak dancing in bars.

AND WTF Ferndale for a gay friendly community you sure are uptight!

• Allow drunks into bars or permit bartenders or waiters to mingle with patrons.

• Use immoral or profane language in a bar.

• Hold a concert or exhibition that corrupts morals.

• Neglect your wife. (this one made my snarf my coffee)

I am such a criminal! Where do i go to turn myself in?

I gotta wonder if i were ever charged would they put me on the sex offender list? Cause that would destroy my career.

+1 for DER!

[n0Mad]

Yeah, I saw that in the Free Press today. I bought a copy just for that article. I've known about most of those laws for years. If I ever ran for office (at any level), my main platform would be rather than continually creating new laws, let's clean up all the old ones. Then, when anything new is made, it's only a trial period for 3-5 years or so. After which the law is reviewed and if it worked/served it's purpose/is a good law/etc. then it can be renewed for 10 years at a time until it no longer serves it's purpose. Otherwise, the law is scrapped.

[Simon Bar Sinister]

Jesse Ventura tried to do that when he got elected governor of Minnesota; I'm pretty sure he managed to set up an old-law-review board to get rid of archaic stuff. don't know how he fared with sunset provisions on laws that were written while he was governor, though.

[angry_darkness]

Laws are so easily added but so hard to remove from the books. people should think about the ramifications the law will have on the future.

[taysteewonderbunny]

• Neglect your wife. (this one made my snarf my coffee)

I think this one hearkens back to pseudo coverture when it was scandalous for a married woman to hold employment. The idea is that whenever you are the sole fiduciarily contributing member of the household, you can not leave the twat to rot.

[*Siren*]

Dumb laws in Florida:

It is illegal to sell your children.

Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.

A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.

If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.

It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.

Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.

Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal. (Umm...does this mean some dumb shit actually tried this?)

It is illegal to skateboard without a license.

When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.

You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.

It is considered an offense to shower naked.

You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.

[*Siren*]

www.dumblaws.com Edited August 27, 2010 by *Siren*