DGN MANFAST Registration Thread

[Destroit]

OPEN REGISTRATION IS HERE!

Although there were some roadblocks in our path, Pestilence and I have officially squared away the opening reservations at Brighton State Recreation's group area, the same scenic location as last year (this year hopefully with a big canopy tent so we don't fry the beer out of our bodies again!)

The Brutal Legacy

This year will be the fourth year of the Official DGN camp outings, but in the first year of its incarnation, neither of us has any idea what an epic event it would evolve into of the course of such a short time! MANFAST, essentially was a beer-fueled, meat-infused accident. The original goal had been to share a casual weekend in the woods to commemorate my birthday, a quiet venture to a campground none of us had ever been to in Brighton. The Friday night was fun and light, drinks were had by the fire, stories told, good times overall. We slept off our buzzes and when we awoke, the morning did not show signs of the storm which was to roll in. This was when the term "MANFAST" had been coined, as a silly inside joke which was then thrown around all weekend during our drunken stupor. A fellow DGNer, who had been the first person to make it up to our camp that morning, picked fun at the fact that we forgot a huge amount of our cooking supplies and so were reduced to only being able to make a huge pile of meat for breakfast. "What the fuck kind of breakfast is that?" he asks, and I can sense he is clearly trying to troll by the tone in his voice. "This isn't a fucking breakfast; this is a mother fucking MANFAST!" was my unexpected response. Nobody can troll me when I have a whole fucking pound of bacon...nobody.

Shortly after breakfast it began to pour. This is when the first miracles of MANFAST began to occur. Through divine powers, Japanese robotic technologies, and German engineering in tha haus, Pestilence was able to construct a fire out of water. Trees were used to knock down other trees to feed the flames. The First Church of Charlie Murphy was established and so we found Darkness. We witnessed a steak sodomize another steak. Chuck Norris was there with us in spirit; he sent us telepathic messages throughout the day. I'm pretty sure I tackled a bear and fucking raped it.

Sunday morning came too soon for us all, even though we were worn to the bone from being apart of more plotless, cheesy action sequences than a Michael Bay movie. It was from that point on we would hold the tradition year in and year out, on the weekend closest to the date that my birthday falls on. It was so, and it was in the second year that lines were required to be drawn and people had to get things straight: Who WAS the most brutal camper to attend that year? And thus...the need for a MANPION was born...

It was determined that whoever earned the title got to keep the title until the following year, simple as that. The prize itself is honor and pride, the manliest prizes of all, but since this IS modern America, and not even most men do things for the sake of just doing them anymore, the winner also receives various other prizes, complimentary MANFAST at my lot on Sunday morning, and gloating rights for the ENTIRE year.

"But Chernobyl, what if I am super froo-froo girly and am afraid of competing with the Big Dogs?"

That's fine, manliness is about being able to impress, so if you would just like to come out for a leisurely weekend to watch our toughest men and women tear each other up like wasted pitbulls, we would love to /flex for you !

Where?

The same place as it as always been at: Brighton State Recreation Area, on the group lot like last year. For those of you who have been to MANFAST for the last two years, you will be familiar with the area. For those who have not, when you register for MANFAST I will PM you a map and an "address" to Mapquest (note: I put "address" because the address is the campground clubhouse, NOT the actual campsite. The detailed map will lead you to the actual site. You can also ask park staff when you get there.)

When?

For those who don't pay attention, it's right in the subtitle for the thread: The weekend of July 8th, 9th, and 10th. Most who are MANFAST enthusiasts are already aware of this, because you started asking me in December, so I have a feeling this paragraph is probably redundant. To be more specific, you're able to show up in the afternoon on Friday (I believe at 2-3pm but I will have to double check that) and you have to GTFO in the afternoon on Sunday.

Pricing

Same deal as last year:

Adults: $12 per person (This is if you have a tent partner)

The sweetest, most well-behaved children in the world: $8

Terrible kids: However much it costs you to hire a sitter

Full-lot deal (Can fit four adults, or two adults and a family of children so long as you don't have a billion kids): $42

Kids cost less because it's already expensive to be a parent and it's even more costly to be a parent that does fun shit with their kids. Do take note of the "terrible kids" price . Anyone who is under 18 must be accompanied by an adult! I apologize to any DGNers who may be teenagers and not yet legal that want to attend, but it is too much liability for me for you to come without a responsible adult. And note that by the use of the word "responsible", that insinuates neither I or Pestilence can vouch to watch you all weekend, so don't even bother to ask . That's like leaving a wolf to guard the flock .

Oh, and since by buying one flat lot you're saving me a lot of hassle, I gift back some of that gratitude in the form in of a discount. If your scheduling is less of a pain in the dick to me, then I will be less of a drain on your wallet!

Parking Permit

The entire State of Michigan has gone through an overhaul on how they run parking permits for their parks and recreation areas. Anyone who has been into Secretary of State since last October may have noticed this. There is now what is called a "Recreation Passport" endorsement, available when you get your tabs renewed, which is covered by a $10 fee that you paid if you opted into the program. If you renewed your tabs since last October, 2010, and did NOT opt in for the Recreation Passport endorsement, it's a flat rate of $10 at the park. Having this sticker is not only $2 cheaper than parking last year, but will get you into any other state park or recreation area in Michigan, good until your tabs expire again next year.

But the good news is for the people such as myself who don't need to get their plates renewed until either July, August, or September of 2011...PARKING IS FREE FOR YOU! There is no longer such a thing a "daily pass", and since this law is new and in effect only since this last October, it does not cover people whose plates have not yet expired. So if your birthday is in July, August or September and you were thinking about getting your plates renewed to get it out of the way...WAIT on that and you park for free!

HOW TO SIGN UP!

Get a hold of me and get me exactly twelve USD (or however many lots/people you're paying for)! I take straight cash-money through us meeting up (if you live close), going to the same clubs/events, you coming to my house to visit because I get lonely, etc. I can also do geezer USPS mail if that's how you roll, PM me for my address, and if I don't think you're a dangerous person, then I will gladly give it to you . The preferred method for you to send me cash is via PayPal, but if I only know you as something silly like "Darkravenshittinbats", shoot me a PM after you send the funds and let me know that your IRL name is something dorky like Spencer or Gertrude. That way I know to look for your payment and which DGNer it belongs came from.

MY PAYPAL: Trenchcoatj@hotmail.com

You can bring guests but your guests must abide by all of the same rules, obviously. Guests cannot be MANTESTANTS. Your guest must be someone not banned from the event. We will always be able to accommodate families and/or 2-3 guests, large numbers of extra people will be contingent on space availability. As always, DGNers have priority over huge amounts of guests.

RULES YOU MUST OBEY, I'MNOTFUCKINGKIDDING,YOUGUYS!

1. Please don't be a loud asshole. We do have a group lot and, yes, that means more seclusion. Just because of this, however, does not give you the right to be Godzilla after-hours and keep everyone at camp DGN up. We are all adults here and if you're not an adult then you came with an adult, please act accordingly! Quiet hours for the park start at 9pm, we've been "loudish" in years' past up until 11 sometimes and have not been in trouble for it, but please don't push it.

2. If you can't handle your liquor - don't drink! This seems simple enough, but in past years we have had a problem with this with certain people. I will admit that the first year someone fed me rum and I was the one who got a little loud after-hours due to it. Now that I realize rum makes me hysterical, I stick to beer only. If I, or anyone else, have to break up fights (like the in the second year), tell people to be quiet a lot because they are being a loud drunk, or babysit you to make sure you don't drown in your own vomit: YOU ARE NEVER EVER COMING TO MANFAST AGAIN.

3. Obey park rules. When I pass out this year's version of the MANPHLET, the park rules will be in there so there is no questioning.

4. Friendly dogs are allowed but MUST be leashed at all times. This is park rules. My dogs are assholes and will be in attendance this year. Frank is more excited than all of us after being fed like 900 steaks last year and 50 pounds of bacon; he's been telling our other dog, Sammy, all about it.

5. Children must NEVER be left unattended. This is camping, if I have to babysit children I will be pissed. I enjoy children, don't get me wrong, I just don't enjoy being responsible for them. So you're not coming back if you off-load your kids with me and hit the beach.

6. NAKED WALL OF BIRTHDAY TITS AND PENIS: YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. Many of you remember the incident last year when one of my birthday gifts happened to be a gigantic eye-full of penis attached to people whose penis I never thought I would see, running right at my face. I can't thank you enough. Sadly...I will have to ask you NOT to run around outside naked. If you have an overwhelming urge to throw off your clothing in a fit of liberty, and you're also attractive, PLEASE do NOT do it outside...come to our tent . I'm sure we can sort it all out. Kthnx.

7. Anyone attending must not be banned from the event or bring any guests that are banned from the event trying to sneak back in. I will ask for the identity of who you're bringing and how you know them, nothing incredibly extensive, but if you knowingly fake the name of someone who is banned to help get them in, they will be asked to leave and you will leave with them. I know who cannot be there and would recognize them on sight, so don't even try it. I bet the odds of this are slim to none, but you never know. If you have any doubt about whether someone you are looking to bring is banned, please contact me.

Those are my main rules. I may add more if they occur to me. Basically I ask for common courtesy and for everyone to remember that we are ambassadors to DGN when we have public events such as this. I would like to leave a great impression on the park and other guests of the park. I am a strict believer of being able to have fun while not being an obnoxious asshole that pisses everyone off. If you don't share my philosophy, please stay home.

Carpooling and Equipment Share

Not everyone is an avid camper and if they are some people go camping with borrowed equipment. This also goes to say that there are a lot of people who would like to attend but to do not have transportation. If you fall into either of these categories and find yourself in need of either a tent or a ride, there are very friendly DGNers who would love to help you with such. Please PM me and let me know if you need something arranged. ALSO: If you want to donate a ride or let someone use extra equipment you may have lying around the house, PLEASE let me know. I will keep track of all the people who are willing to give and those who are in need and try to match them up, thus taking out work for you. If you are offering a ride, please let me know where you are coming from and how many your vehicle will sit besides your equipment and whoever else you're bringing (also, if you'd like gas money for it). If you're in need of a ride, let me know where you're coming from, extra people (if any), how much gas money you're volunteering (if any) and roughly how much baggage you're bringing.

Tent/Lot Pairing

Although the group area is a gigantic fucking field and the odds of any other adult groups reserving any space in it is slim to none, the park still breaks down reservations into lots that are two tents per lot and four total adults (or two adults and some children). I think it has to do with capacity issues. ame protocol as last year. If you have a pre-determined group of four, let me know who is in your group. If you are a single, double, or triple and are looking for more people to lot with, let me know this also and if you're willing to be co-ed or if you want to be gender exclusive (this is a big deal to some people, especially ladies. Most women are uncomfortable with being put into the same sleeping arrangements with a guy they don't know, and this understandable.)

Visitors

We always welcome DGNers who want to drop in for the afternoon, usually on Saturday, to get down on the festivities of the event and kick back a drink or two. Visitors are usually required to leave at around 10-11pm, although we have had stragglers stay later without the park saying anything. YOU CANNOT CRASH AT THE CAMP. I have had in the past where someone has shown up, someone else just happened to have space on their lot and in their tent, and that person paid me the admission on the spot. That is fully acceptable, but know that available space and someone to share it with you is available on chance. But if you do not pay and/or there is nowhere to put you, then you can't stay. PM me to let me know that you are thinking of dropping in, even if you are not confirming and it is just a possibility, and I will send you out a map, directions and our contact numbers about a week before the event.

MANPION FTW!

If you're looking to win this year's MANFAST:

*** You MUST be there the entire weekend. This means from Friday afternoon to Sunday afternoon.

*** It will go by individual this year, NOT by entire lot.

*** We will have pre-determined events. You do not have to be in EVERY event to win (but the more you're in it will probably increase your chances). This is so you do not feel as though you HAVE to be in every event...I do not want to tie down anyone's weekend with numerous events. We will be on a points system this year. You can win points OUTSIDE of the events also ensuring that people can win on creativity.

*** COSTUMES: IF YOU COME DRESSED AS SOMETHING MANLY SUCH AS CHUCK NORRIS, DANNY TREJO, MR. T, MEGATRON, A PIRATE, GODZILLA, NAZI ZOMBIES OR ANYTHING ELSE YOUR MIND CAN CONJURE UP THEN YOU GET MASSIVE MANPTS! You will get extra points for each costume.

*** You MUST be registered as a MANTESTANT, not a spectator. Come Friday (about an hour or so after arrival, you can change it upon arrival also) you will be EITHER a MANTESTANT or spectator. Up until then you may change this, after that point there will be no exceptions.

*** YOU MUST HAVE THE LIABILITY FORM SIGNED!

NOW FLOOD MY INBOX! GO GO! PEW PEW!

Edited May 14, 2011 by Chernobyl

[Destroit]

Standing Lot Roster

Last updated 0046 7/7/11

Fully paid for and confirmed:

(Reminder, your lot partner does not "matter" in that you will not need to have your tent right next to theirs upon arrival. It is only for the purpose in that there is a park code where you can only have four people (either two tents, or one large tent) or two adults and children to a reservation. If you are lotted up with someone and you don't know them or didn't "pick" them, don't freak out, you will not be parked next to them at the event. However, many of them I condense out of order, and it is because those people have expressed that there will most likely be people added to their reservation (visually easier for everyone if similar reservations, friends, guests, DGN mate requests, are grouped up). Also, if you are one single person with no guests, the maximum you may reserve is a double lot ($24). You may only reserve a full lot if you are at least three adults or two adults with children.*** (There is obviously no point to being two people reserving a full lot for "privacy" when you don't have to actually be parked next to any lot mates, that is the reasoning. I am technically saving you money, so thank me later )

Lot 1

Chernobyl

Pestilence

Timata (MANTESTANT)

Ricky (MANTESTANT)

Lot 2

Raev (MANTESTANT)

Siren (MANTESTANT)

Tyger (Spectator)

Cowboydave (Spectator)

Lot 3

Garbeldena (MANTESTANT)

Junefun (Spectator)

Black Jack (MANTESTANT)

Enishi (MANTESTANT)

Lot 4 (Full)

MEAN BEAN (MANTESTANT)

THE MANTERNAL (MANTESTANT)

Reaper

Reaper's lady friend

Lot 5 (Full)

Tszura (Spectators)

Nightgaunt (Spectators)

TaysteeWonderBunny (Spectator)

Spook

Lot 6

GRG's Guest

GothicRavenGoddess (Spectator)

KatRN05 (Spectator) (Tent mate open, arriving Saturday morning, has tent)

Donation spot (Ask me how to claim!)

Lot 7 (Full)

Iris (MANTESTANT)

---------

wormsinwomb (Spectator)

sglgothmom (Spectator)

Lot 8

EAF (MANTESTANT)

iamchrispy (Undecided)

Slogo (MANTESTANT)

Donation Spot (Ask me how to claim)

Lot 9

Our buddy, James (MANTESTANT)

----------

Our other buddy, Whiskey (MANTESTANT)

Jaz, Whiskey's guest

Lot 10

Torn Asunder

----------

Lucifer

Constantin

Lot 11

Peelingchrome

Dude 1

Dude 2

Dude 3

Total spots paid and confirmed: 44

Spots left available: 56 (14 full lots)

Edited July 7, 2011 by Chernobyl

[Raev]

6. NAKED WALL OF BIRTHDAY TITS AND PENIS: YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. Many of you remember the incident last year when one of my birthday gifts happened to be a gigantic eye-full of penis attached to people whose penis I never thought I would see, running right at my face. I can't thank you enough. Sadly...I will have to ask you NOT to run around outside naked. If you have an overwhelming urge to throw off your clothing in a fit of liberty, and you're also attractive, PLEASE do NOT do it outside...come to our tent . I'm sure we can sort it all out. Kthnx.

[Destroit]

There is a surprise this year that is so fucking epic and will change the way that MANFAST happens for forever and I'm going to have such a hard time keeping it secret until then .

There is a surprise this year that is so fucking epic and will change the way that MANFAST happens for forever and I'm going to have such a hard time keeping it secret until then .

[torn asunder]

yet again this year, i'm going to try my best to make it out for the weekend. will let ya know soon as i can!

[DJ Nocker]

Pirates arent manly...

[Destroit]

Pirates arent manly...

Oh says you. You are not the definitive guide to manliness and nobody died and made you MANKING .

Oh says you. You are not the definitive guide to manliness and nobody died and made you MANKING .

[DJ Nocker]

Oh says you. You are not the definitive guide to manliness and nobody died and made you MANKING .

Says you.

[Joey Deadcat]

I don't do outdoors but you folks all have a good one this year.

[Destroit]

Says you.

Yeap, I win. says me. */flex*

Yeap, I win. says me. */flex*

[Slogo]

6. NAKED WALL OF BIRTHDAY TITS AND PENIS: YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. Many of you remember the incident last year when one of my birthday gifts happened to be a gigantic eye-full of penis attached to people whose penis I never thought I would see, running right at my face. I can't thank you enough. Sadly...I will have to ask you NOT to run around outside naked. If you have an overwhelming urge to throw off your clothing in a fit of liberty, and you're also attractive, PLEASE do NOT do it outside...come to our tent . I'm sure we can sort it all out. Kthnx.

That's bullshit....

we weren't running.

[Destroit]

That's bullshit....

we weren't running.

There was some jiggling and wobbling so it gave off the impression of running. I was also drunk and bewildered.

There was some jiggling and wobbling so it gave off the impression of running. I was also drunk and bewildered.

[DJ Nocker]

I don't do outdoors but you folks all have a good one this year.

Same reason I doubt ill show...

[KatRN05]

[Destroit]

[Slogo]

We did not show up naked...WE DID NAAAAHT

[Destroit]

We did not show up naked...WE DID NAAAAHT

You're so dressing up as Tommy Wiseau, aren't you?

You're so dressing up as Tommy Wiseau, aren't you?

[junefun28]

I thinks I may need to put a lock on Torrie's clothing so he can't take it off when he gets too drunk. (way to much of a naked time enthusiast)

[the eternal]

What's MANFAST again?

[Destroit]

What's MANFAST again?

Nothing you'd be interested in, not your type of thing at all

Nothing you'd be interested in, not your type of thing at all

[prick]

I cant wait, Im going.

[Slogo]

You're so dressing up as Tommy Wiseau, aren't you?

I think about everything

[the eternal]

Nothing you'd be interested in, not your type of thing at all

I figured.

I hate camping.

I hate Chuck Norris.

You all know I'm a strict vegan, who mainly lives on the Fugazi diet (a steady diet of nothing)

And I'd rather die that let anyone see my ass naked.

I'm a very modest, quiet guy.

Most people call me shadow, because they barely notice I'm there.

And I tell you one thing, even when I ate meat, I wouldn't even look at bacon.

I CERTAINLY would NEVER take an hour round trip drive JUST to go to a dive like

for some stupid event called

where they serve THE BEST FUCKING DESSERT EVER!

A Maple Bacon Sundae made with real hickory smoked bacon, 2 scoops of ice cream, and maple syrup topping.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT is it good!

I mean, eww, gross! I spit on your disgusting depraved bacon-filled weekend.

[Destroit]

Your friends don't call you shadow and you know it. We call you Hadouken because you're down-right fierce.

Your friends don't call you shadow and you know it. We call you Hadouken because you're down-right fierce.

[Black Jack (1)]

Edited May 11, 2011 by Black Jack