Your Ideal Significant Other Qualities?

[Troy Spiral (13)]

What are some key things that you HAVE to have?

What are some things you'd like, but are not musts?

What are deal breakers?

I know i was very uncertain about such things until recently and a lot has changed about my personality even just the last year or two (hopefully for the better), curious as to what is on peoples minds.

[deadcoldgothgirl]

I used to have specific things that I had to have that matt broke me of. Oh how "love" messes with your mind.

- Loves me for me

- Doesn't do drugs

- Uses mannors

- Likes a lot of the things I do

- A person I can relate to

- I tend to go for people a lot like me with tattoos and same music interests

- I don't want a lot of things, but the occasional dinner and random nice gesture works

- Honest

- Loyal

- Will always put me first in their lives because I'm always putting them first in mine

[Destroit]

Hot guy, not blonde, doesn't give me STDs or cheat in general, boner. I don't require much.

[Joey Deadcat]

Child-free

Free-Spirited nature

strong character

empowered

marches, dances, prances, and saunters to her own beat

depth

never a damsel-in-distress

has a huge love/appreciation for and understanding of aesthetics, styles, and cultures of bygone decades and a disregard for much of today's pop culture

twisted sense of humor

pluses but not musts:

Already mentioned childfree but if she happens to have a dislike of children then my heart may go pitter-patter and bippity-boppity

Celtic stock, especially red/auburn hair and green eyes

Mod or ye-ye type style about her with a bit of retro horror queen

very minimal piercings and tats - in this day and age it's become too commonplace and seems to be more of a status symbol

deal breakers:

emotional baggage, self-destructive habits, neediness, clinginess...

Edited July 6, 2011 by Joey Deadcat

[phee]

I used to have specific things that I had to have that matt broke me of. Oh how "love" messes with your mind.

- Loves me for me

- Doesn't do drugs

- Uses mannors

- Likes a lot of the things I do

- A person I can relate to

- I tend to go for people a lot like me with tattoos and same music interests

- I don't want a lot of things, but the occasional dinner and random nice gesture works

- Honest

- Loyal

- Will always put me first in their lives because I'm always putting them first in mine

Seems reasonable.

[Simon Bar Sinister]

I don't know if there's any trait I have to have anymore. even my longstanding affinity for tall ladies (well, 5'7" to 6'2" or thereabouts, to be specific) may be wavering a bit.

smoking still remains dealbreaker #1.

[Nienna]

What are some key things that you HAVE to have?

Stability! (Mental, financial, physical) I'm not into raising an adult child.

Child Free (Unless your kid is awesome, and baby mama is also either awesome or out of the picture)

Intelligence

A social personality. Sitting at home is not my idea of fun.

Great hygiene

Creativity and free spirited

Non Christian or at least very ok with my being so.

Not clingy, needy, a cheater, a liar, abusive or possessive.

Being ok with the fact that I cannot bear children.

What are some things you'd like, but are not musts?

Tall, not blonde, not fat but not cut either

Fashionable

Loves travel

is into weird stuff like SCA or sci-fi cons

Likes to dance

Absolutely child free

What are deal breakers?

A million kids

a psycho ex

being clingy, needy, possessive, abusive or generally a douchelord.

poor hygiene

bad grammar

low intelligence

rude

[Joey Deadcat]

Oh yeah...and a love of cats has to figure in there as well.

[dragonluv]

-caring

-be able to trust

-communication

There are countless other things. These few things, I treasured the most.

[bean]

If my husband (who is my ideal now) left me tomorrow, here is what I would be looking for in my next mate:

HAVE to have:

A good sense of humor

Understands that I need time alone daily

Understands that I need quiet sometimes

Is not uncomfortable with silence

Is not arrogant

Isn't clingy (and is okay with me needing space at times)

Is optimistic

Doesn't mope all the time

Doesn't complain too much

Can deal with my moods

Isn't selfish

Isn't narcissistic

Intelligent

Likes most of the same music as I do

Want to live in Hawaii or somewhere on the West coast

Wants to travel the world

Loves animals (especially cats)

Is okay that I will never own a dog

Is okay with my tattoos and piercings and understands and is okay that I want more in the future

Polite

Has manners (but isn't formal, except when necessary)

Things I'd like, but are not musts:

Likes to read

Is into psychology

Doesn't believe in God

Isn't religious

Believes in ghosts, past lives, etc.

Is not a morning person

Deal breakers?

Cheating

Substance abuse

Has more than 1 child/has a bratty child/has a psycho ex

Boring

Is a dumb-ass

Likes terrible music

Abusive (people or animals)

Acts like a horny teenager (i.e verbally drools over every "attractive" person he/she sees)

Self-centered

Lazy

Has a severe mental illness (I have done this in the past and I can't do it again)

Pessimistic

Paranoid

Complainer

[havoc]

i really have lost hope that here is a woman out there who has the following;

ability to deal with the fact that i love androgeny and lean more than slightly feminine

good communicaton skills (I'm not a mind reader)

willing to try most anything in bed

realises that i like to hunt animals(deer,rabbit,turkey,squrrel)i dident say i was completly feminine lol

loves to wear chokers(nothing sexier than a choker)

doesnt judge people

wants to work with me so we can have nice things

knows that bitching and complaining is not the way to get what you want

is trustworthy

if you see this woman feel free to give her my e-mail but im going to warn you she is elusive

deal breakers

drugs

heavy drinking

lazy...doesnt work

Edited July 26, 2011 by havoc

[TygerLili]

There are very few "must have" qualities that I require, I tend to be more concerned with deal breakers

It's a moot point now, as I am engaged, but any guy that I get involved with must:

be intelligent

have a sense of humor that meshes with mine

be caring and concerned about me

know how to be polite and appropriate in different social situations, but be able to let his hair down and be a little goofy when it's just the two of us

Understand that I am very independent and sometimes need to go off by myself for a while, and on the flip side, have some friends and interests that don't really include me, so he can amuse himself when I need space

Be open minded to learning and experiencing new things

Deal Breakers:

abusive

cheating

bigoted

unintelligent

deceptive/evasive when talking about his past, or what's currently going on in his life

closed minded

demanding (ask guys I've dated, I become quite insolent when someone tries to put demands on me)

bad hygiene

hates animals

bothered by the fact that I am a vegetarian

bothered by the fact that I don't believe in organized religion

does drugs

hardcore geeks/gamers (That last one may seem harsh or unreasonable, but I've tried it in the past, and it just doesn't work. If his idea of a perfect Saturday or Sunday is spending 2 hours at the game/computer/comic book store, and then spending the rest of the day gaming with his friends, it will be way too hard for me not to go looking for another guy to take me out and spend time with me on those days.)

[Troy Spiral (13)]

I think deadcool goth girls list (along with a few other addons from following posts) are things I just assume are baseline requrements. "Kind, Decent, Honest" etc.

I'm trying to think of something that I want, that is not lets say, "what every everyone wants".

#1 Open Minded / Freethinker - at least minor interested in reality beyond gossip and what is happening with the neighbors. Especially about "big questions" wouldn't matter at first, but in the long run discussing meaningful things is important to me, I don't want to end up like my dad, married to someone that you can't even really talk to about anything other than the bills and the weather till the day you die.

Won't get overly upset that I get sick a lot - So... that's a tall order, because after awhile it just gets old, I know i get sick of it, its times 10,00OX for someone else that has to deal with it. Essentially I'll be single forever unless this crap goes away somehow.

I doubt I'm going to give up my interest in gaming (video/board/card/tabletop) anytime soon, might be rough if they hate all that stuff. Not that I play it 24/7 but it is a key interest.

Cuddles - they have to like cuddles that's like the massive deal breaker.

There are tons of other stuff that I might "like" but its not a requirement, people are all so different that it really depends on a mixture of all their traits.