I never really intruduced myself yet.

[Etalimissa]

Okay, here it goes. I never really "introduced myself" here when I was recently new. I've made many posts but have not really given my story here in the newbies section. And, I am officially still a newbie.

I am originally from Dearborn but am lost in Wasteland (Westland) now and my soul is dead inside. I am surrounded by lots of "Larry the cable guy" types who are into hoedowns and reruns of Yee Haw. I have never been married thus do not fit into the "soccer mom" or any type of "mom" category. I feel like a fish out of water and my zodiac says my element is water so I am the suffocating without h2o here.

I had quite a few buddies/friends here but in the past 6 years I lost them all. Many of them died. Four of my neighbours died in one year. Then came the droves of people flocking away from MI to greener pastures. My last close friend took off to LA and is basking in the sun now--no massive heat index or slippery snow ever again. I miss the human element and face-to-face contact.

I hate to tell my personal plight here but have to since I simply cannot do it over and over (have told it 1000's of times already). I have had 19 operations since birth and am "only" on disability. I had a huge battle which lasted the previous six years and it's finally partially over but I am drained and feel that I just need to hibernate for about a year. I have never had a criminal past. I do not smoke, drink any alcohol, or partake in the frivolities of drug usage. I am pretty much a nerdette by day and would love to be a goth by night again if I had a fellow goth or gothette to goth on with.

I used to have lots of buddies I saw concerts with in the 80's-90's. Dearborn was very conservative and I only had one punk friend (who I saw the clash with) but she disappeared. There were some cool people in other cities but since I've never driven (had two head injuries as a kid and now I'm on pain meds which make me drowsy and not alert to drive) I was stuck with the local friend pool which had nothing gothic or alternative. Why tell all of this? Because I never want anyone to call me weird or anti-social. I am just cursed to be in the wrong place, wrong time, wrong body, and so on.

I've been on the Christian sites and all the men want pretty little obedient Asian mail-order-brides. The nationwide sites are, well, nationwide and thus distance is an issue. Then the worldwide sites are even more difficult. I've fallen hard for more than one man in my favourite European country. I can't help it, they are much more intelligent than the life forms in my community. And don't even talk about Craigslist for finding a friend (grrrrrrr)! I crave a person with a brain to communicate with! I've always described goths/alternative music fans as "Very intelligent, very artistic, very kind and loyal to their own, and very accepting of others who are fellow kindred spirits."

I was supposed to have married a man in Belgium but his life fell apart and I just don't date. I really miss human companionship but am not really into the dating thing. I knew a "Christian" lady who said she dated over 100 men a year. Personally I don't believe in such a lifestyle and that is not the Christian way.

I am into a lot of things which I've really been out of the loop on for years. I used to collect baseball cards as a kid-20's. I still like baseball very much but have only been to Comerica Park twice. I love concerts but that stopped when my friend abandoned me for LA and my aunt stopped taking me to the free Windsor casino concerts (I would see the shows while she gambled). I used to love museums, zoos, and all things educational. I am not into bars one bit. I like using the brain since, after all, the brain is a terrible thing to waste. I am into animal rights (but not too into pesty raccoons and such who tear this place apart) and have been a semi vegetarian for 25 years, void of red meat. If food was not so astronomically priced I would be a full vegetarian but could never be a vegan and give up cheese.

I am a great person on the inside but not too many people get to experience this in person since, as I keep saying, there is no intelligent life force in my community. I long for human friendship once in a while. I have been told by many that I am intelligent. Many more said I am funny as heck. I guess I turn to humour to hide the real feelings inside (pain and now loneliness), however I was always a class clown in school and even college.

My favourite band, as everyone who knows me says, is skinny puppy. They are my life blood. I also adore my favourite MI band of all time--the romantics. I have never been a groupie but I always liked to collect autographs at tigers games and from my favourite musicians if I was lucky enough to meet them. There are just as many male fans looking for autographs so does this make them groupies? No. Some fans just like these things. I an into goth/industrial, classical and world beat music mostly. I like the sounds of exotic musical instruments from around the world such as Australia, Peru, India, and so on. I don't really follow the terms for all these sub-genres of music such as "death metal". To me it's goth or it's not, end of. I am into the music and bands, not the category of music.

I've been into goth music since the early to mid 1980's. However, I am not into death, cemeteries, sucking blood (JK), etc. I just like the music and cute fashion. If anyone else on this site (M or F) is also in an area full of vast nothingness and wishes to converse with me or even add me as a "friend" feel free to do so. I am in my 40's since I am an old school goth and, as I said, have been into it since about 1984. I would like to go to the Renaissance festival but have no way of getting there and as I said, everyone is dead or moved out of MI. I did go once and picked the topic and it was the swaschbuckler days since I have been into buccaneers since I was four years old. I grew up on Douglas Fairbanks Jr repeats on TV (Bill Kennedy At The Movies) and loved pirate, vampire, musicals, and other classic film styles. Thus, IF anyone is in my area of vast nothingness (Westland) or passes by on their way to Holly and would let me tag along I would like to go.

Thank you for reading my novel. Part two will be out shortly (I'll use that little bouncing guy whenever possible) Have a nice day and an even lovelier night.

[Etalimissa]

Troy, this should count as 4 or 5 posts on my post count Lord knows it's long enough.

[Simon Bar Sinister]

[*Siren*]

[victoriavengeance (1)]

Thank you for sharing all of that with us! I love getting to hear more about people, online you can only get so much from a person I guess officially 'welcome' to the family now

[Troy Spiral (13)]

Troy, this should count as 4 or 5 posts on my post count Lord knows it's long enough.

I read it all too! heh. Thanks for taking the time to post an introduction.

Leme see if I can summarize it for the people that can't read posts longer than a paragraph (you'd be surpized how many people can't read a post longer than two paragaphs:

Etalimissa (My guess at the pronunciation: Et Ah Melissa(?))

- I really like Skinny Puppy

- I've been into goth since the 80s but am not into some of the more vampire-like aspects of it.

- I like Baseball

- I've tried many online communities usually they have had people I didn't fit with well or they are too "national".

- Would like to make some friends here / concert buddies.... and I'm nice and should post more.

[Tyger]

[Queen of Foxes]

Hello ^-^

[prick]

Welcome to our own little insanity!

[Etalimissa]

Hi everyone and thanks so much for all the welcome's. I appreciate it. Nyxiin, I like your blinking profile thumbnail photo. Really cool. Tyger, I like your hamster profile photo and the cute little emoticons in your signature. Troy, my nick name is pronounced as "Eta-luh-missa" (cute, "I'm nice and should post more")! I love my fellow goth community and kindred spirits and wish some would become my buddy (hint hint) I didn't know some people could not read it all or else I would have broken it up into 4 postings in the same subject.

[eatdirt426]

Hi ^_^ welcome to our dark little corner of the interwebs

[taysteewonderbunny]

Welcome!