My Friendships

[LadyKay]

Nearly all of my friendships go down the same path. I meet someone, hit it off with them, then both of us have a great time hanging around together being best friends to each other Then after 4 or 5 years its over. Something happens like they meet someone else and there is no room for me. Or they move away or just up and leave and I never see or hear from them again. It has always been like that. A great, close, loyal,friendship for about 5 years then its over. Then I am left empty and hollow inside.

[wormsinwombs]

same here. makes me wonder if I'm a crappy person.

[phee]

I don't let go of my friendships without a fight usually.

[Joey Deadcat]

People will come and go; it's always best never to get attached to folks. Eventually, there will be newer folks to take the place of those you currently know.

[Rayne]

That happens with me and girls.

Which is why 99% of my friends are guys.

[Illuminatrix]

Similar situation here. I put in 90% of the effort for most friendships, and then things drop off when I become mentally drained from it all and go under the radar. No one notices.

However, I do feel fortunate to finally have a best friend, for the first time in my life. ^_^ Things are looking up a bit.

[SaGa]

eh we get older. people are less interested in friends. sometimes its lovers over friends. sometimes its work over friends.

[Troy Spiral (13)]

Less interested in friends? I'm actually more interested in them now not less. Although I guess i'm also "more interested in a relationship than I am in a friendship." but both things have risen on my list of priories.

I only have one "real life" close friend that has lasted more than say 5 years. Many of them are exactly this same sort of thing were they are almost in the 'best friend" category, and then somehow, it just falls by the wayside. In my case I lost the majority of them after "The car accident" and I wasn't happy-party-every-week troy, but the same thing had happened before that, just not quite in such a stark way.

The shifting nature of friendships is an odd thing, its hard to know if its "just the way it is" or if we just have crappy friends, or maybe its our fault somehow. We all have our own particulars.

One thing that frustrates me is just that it takes effort to keep even the best friendship going, and people just get lazy. Even single people without a full time job and all the auto-excuses that many other people have.

[Illuminatrix]

Oddly, I've experienced people avoiding me BECAUSE I've gotten into relationships. I still don't understand it.

Dealing with anyone for a long time can potentially cause the accumulation of boredom and strain. That's why it takes so much effort to attempt to keep things fun and fresh. The only thing is that both parties need to be conscious of the problems, keep an open dialogue of communication, and be willing to put forth the effort.

[LadyKay]

Oddly, I've experienced people avoiding me BECAUSE I've gotten into relationships. I still don't understand it.

Dealing with anyone for a long time can potentially cause the accumulation of boredom and strain. That's why it takes so much effort to attempt to keep things fun and fresh. The only thing is that both parties need to be conscious of the problems, keep an open dialogue of communication, and be willing to put forth the effort.

Well what about people really caring about you. Instead of just being someone who is around for entertainment and a good time? I mean I understand getting bored with doing the same old stuff together like movies, and bars or whatever. But do people then just toss a person out of their life because they are bored with them? Maybe I am looking for something rare in a friendship? And I just have not found the right person yet? Or maybe after a few years they discover that I am truly nuts and can't deal with my craziness any longer!

Edited July 25, 2012 by LadyKay

[Class-Punk]

I have people I've known for a long time and even though I rarely see them, when we see each other everything is cool. It might not be exactly the same to seeing someone every day, week or month, but people get busy one way or another and that kills the time to be social. It seems like when you see someone every day your bound to end up arguing at some point, even over something completely retarded, and if your a guy-- drunk. I've called off a lot of partying and hanging out usually because I needed to weight train, and I won't let anything get in the way of it except extreme sickness.

Edited July 31, 2012 by Coffeenated