I really dont want to be on my meds anymore

[Nerdcore]

I have thought about this for a while and I wanna try to get off my meds.. but I am super scared. I have been off them before and the results are worser than me being on them. I dont understand why.. I mean iIfeel the same way when Im on my meds then when Im off.. I just get more paranoid and angry/moody/ depressed when Im off them . But when Im on them I still feel the same( just takes the edge off of them for a while) Im always happy sad up and down angry happy angry moody. I have tryed to talk to my doc and he has said things that I dont agree with. some times Im even afraid of everything and I just stay in doors. God I am tired of feeling like this. mabey I do not have the happy gene? Im just tired of people thinking im some dumb chick that doesnt do anything. I used to do alot of shit. sew read write draw. Now I just sleep watch tv and force myself to go out to CC and all just to drink. People ask me also" why do u walk away from a convosation" WELL becusae I think anything I say will not be inportant and I have a short attention span. And people think that I am slow or stupid becuase of that . I mean hello ! I wanna go to school and become somthing , but I just dont have hte nerve and all.. mabey I should just go crawl in a box and never come out. I feel so usless and unwanted. and people say "oh dont feel that way, you have freinds." well I think I dont.. no one ever calls me. I mean they say they wei wll but never do... grr sorry im ranting and raving .. its late im depressed and alone

:fear

[bean]

I think we share a brain...I think all of those exact things. The main reason I drag my ass to CC is to drink myself into a coma. I actually went to a shrink this week and he wants to put me on meds for my bipolar disorder, and I told him no, because the last time I was on meds, things got worse.

Having said that, and what my schooling has taught me is that if you are still feeling bad, you are not on the right meds. You should even get a different doctor if this one is not helping.

The thing about stopping you meds suddenly is that you can have a psychotic break, and that would not be good.

A question for you: Are you in therapy as well or just taking medications?

Often times, therapy is helpful along with meds. It can be difficult, goddess, I know, because I tend to hold my feelings inside and not want to talk to anyone about them.

As far as feeling like you don't have friends/they don't call, I think this exact same thing. You just have to remind yourself that people are busy sometimes and it has nothing to do with you, so sometimes you have to take the initiative. Also, I'm really bad about calling people, and have to remind myself to do so. So maybe you could pick up the phone and call a friend (I know this can be difficult when depressed). Your friends will be there for you and will help you through your tough times.

I truly hope things get better for you. *hugs*

[Homicidalheathen]

Read this book: Serpent of Fire: A Modern View of Kundalini, by: Darrel Irving. I will let you borrow it but GIVE IT BACK. I will keep it in my car for you in case I see you.

Rai Linga on here is a good one to talk to. I think he has like 5 phyic degrees and tries to treat people without all the meds...is very good at it too.

I am anit med, anit synthetic...people survived for centuries without all this crap in their systems....coarse I smoke allot of pot for pain and depression.

I will help you all I can. I have meditation and yoga (private on basis only) sessions in my home. Write me if your interested but read this book.

I truely believe there may be a bit of a conspiracy to make everyone fit into the same type of tiny box (we are worker drones) and meds keep us feeling how we are 'supposed' to feel. How are we supposed to feel? Did the creator sqrew up so bad when making your brain you need to drug it??? I doubt it.

I get anit social at the club too. I have noticed sometims it is because there is just a vibe in the air that doesn't agree with me.

It's instinct.

You can sit next to me so you don't feel alone or look 'stupid' and not even talk to me I don't care. I like people who understand my quiet moods.

Oh my name is Windy by the way. Just say Hi to me.

I have thought about this for a while and I wanna try to get off my meds.. but I am super scared. I have been off them before and the results are worser than me being on them.  I dont understand why.. I mean iIfeel the same way when Im on my meds then when Im off.. I just get more paranoid and angry/moody/ depressed when Im off them . But when Im on them I still feel the same( just takes the edge off of them for a while) Im always happy sad up and down angry happy angry moody. I have tryed to talk to my doc and he has said things that I dont agree with. some times Im even afraid of everything and I just stay in doors. God I am tired of feeling like this. mabey I do not have the happy gene? Im just tired of people thinking im some dumb chick that doesnt do anything. I used to do alot of shit. sew read write draw. Now I just sleep watch tv and force myself to go out to CC and all just to drink. People ask me also" why do u walk away from a convosation"  WELL becusae I think anything I say will not be inportant and I have a short attention span.  And people think that I am slow or stupid becuase of that . I mean hello ! I wanna go to school and become somthing , but I just dont have hte nerve and all.. mabey I should just go crawl in a box and never come out. I feel so usless and unwanted. and people say "oh dont feel that way, you have freinds." well I think I dont.. no one ever calls me. I mean they say they wei wll but never do... grr sorry im ranting and raving .. its late im depressed and alone

:fear

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[kellygrrrrrl]

I think a lot of people USE meds as a crutch or a staple to trick thier brains into thinking that "HEY If I take this, I will be OK"..or this will make problems go away and so on. Not so. Truth is is we all have problems, some worse than others, and even worse than that in some cases, but it is how we COPE with things, or interpret situations that will make or break you. I have always asked myself, Am I crazy? Why do I feel so down and out and blue, and so on. Well...if I realistically look at it, shit, my life has been a big dissapoinment, and I am broke and I have never had anything and blah blah blah well no wonder why I am so down. Amongst bigger issues, it is how we cope. If we use smoking to cope, when quitting, problems will be harder to cope with. We all want something to make us feel better when we have problems, but no chemicals or pills, or beer, or weed, or whatever can make the problems go away. I could be dead TODAY...and all of my money issues, and family strifes and past regrets and all of my resentments towards others will go away and will have meant nothing to anything. Wasted thinking and all it does is make you sad /sick/mad/upset etc and for what? WE Decide to feel this way. Sometimes it is Recognizing that we ARE the issue and it is HOW we think about things. ....... Something I have learned recently becuase I am the angry-est person EVER ... and have realized some error in my own ways. I AM the reason I am so down about money, because I am allowing it... for example.

[Onyx]

I could not function without my meds. If I didn't have a stroke from high blood pressure plus I'd be literally disabled with migraines.

I spent thousands of dollars and tried so many things, acupuncture, changing diet, exercise, and tons of different things, went through doctor after doctor before finding a doctor who explained everything and with a combined diet/medication program I am doing so much better.

Sounds like you do need to find a new doctor or get the doctor you have now to look at your meds and see if they can try you on something different. Everyone reacts differently.

A lot (not all but a lot) of medications are derived from herbs (once we lose the rain forest we are gonna be in deep shit). By the way, using pot is still medicating yourself! Caffeine is a drug and so is alcohol. Nearly everyone uses some kind of drug.

It's true that doctors tend to overmedicate and we should definitely use as few drugs as possible, if it improves your quality of life I don't feel anyone should go without meds that help them. The hard thing is finding something that works well for whatever mental or physical problem you are facing.

Plus, what I said before about looking at your life situation I still believe to be true. Making changes where you can to make things better for yourself can go a long way toward making you feel better. (((hugs))) I hope you can figure things out so that you can feel better.

[capuchin]

What meds are you on? If you don't like them and/or they aren't helping, definitely get off of them, but how you go about this depends on what drug you're on. Some medications, especially certain kinds of anti-anxiety medications, have some very bad side effects if you go off them too quickly...

[pomba gira]

Excellent advice from Beanwater & Onyx, I will just add my voice to theirs & repeat, just quitting your meds cold is almost never a good idea, & you need to find a doc you have a better rapport with. You are not obligated to just accept the first thing they try, I know people who've taken a year or more to find the right meds/combination/dosage that worked for them. It's a process & often not a quick one 'cos many antidepressants (esp. SSRIs) & anxiolytics can take as much as a month to fully "kick in". But for it to work it's soo important you have a doc you feel comfortable talking to. If you are receiving services through your local Community Mental Health agency you may have to go through your patients' rights advocate... just remember you are legally entitled to personalized care that will work for you.

Also agree w/Kellygrrl- the meds are not going to magically turn things around all on their own. Ideally what will happen is they will get you into a space where you have the clarity and energy to turn things around for yourself. To put Onyx & Kellygrrl's thoughts another way, you will still have to do the work of un-learning your present way of being and learning a new one. That's where therapy can be valuable.

I wish you well, hit me up any time... I went thru a lifetime of depression & almost 20 yrs of addiction and came out the other side. If I could do it anyone can!