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I Dont Know How I Get Talked Into These Things


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This is way too complicated to explain completely in a post. I will keep it as short as I can. My husband's son from his first marriage is 26 years old. He has spent most of his adult life going from job to job being unable to keep a job for longer then 6 months. Something always happens. He gets let go, he gets fired, he gets hurt and can't work. You get the picture. He has recently ended up basically homeless living with different people. He moved in with some guy about a month ago. Now that guy says it is time for him to get out. For whatever reason I am not sure of. This afternoon when I came home from church, my husband told me he is going today drive down to Ohio and pick up his son to come live with us! I guess that his son called him crying on the phone saying he has no place to go and the guy he is living with is kicking him out today! Of corse when I heard that he was coming here like right now It did not go over very well with me. I mean we had been talking about it but I had not fully agreed to it as of yet. After much yelling and screaming from me I finely gave in. God help us all is all I can say and I mean that sincerely. As I do not know how this is going to turn out. I guess my husband just good not stand to hear his son crying on the phone bagging him to please help. Please don't judge us. My husband is a very loving man and thinks that what he is doing is going to help turn his son around. I just hope my anti-anxity meds hold out.

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I hate to say it, but I see this all the time. The son is usually a deadbeat who would much rather mooch than take care of his own business because he is looking for someone to do it for him. This is the type that, after he gets settled, he falls into lazy mode. Once the parents take him in, he feels he has a free ride because he is blood. That's usually when the real problems start. If the child is ever denied financial security or finally at the point of being put out, the child ends up showing a side no one has seen before and in more cases than not, it ends up down at the "station" and airs on ID TV.

My suggestion is watch yourself and keep a close eye on any behavioral changes in the son. His father will be more protective and defensive about any subject involving his son, so anytime conversation comes up about him, always sound concerned for both of their well being before vocalizing any opinions. And at that point, always be sure to have a positive suggestion in mind. If the son appears too non-contributional to his current situation, his father will suggest, or try, to get him some form of employment. That is usually a touchy feely situation as well and can sometimes become volatile. It only takes a spark to turn an already awkward situation into an explosive one. Some patterns of human nature never change and this one sounds classic. If need be, make sure you are available for family counseling.

I wish you the best in this situation. :grouphug

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