Do Looks Matter?

[Black Sunday]

ver 1.5

[JaneDead]

well i tend to be attracted to a person based on who they are first. then the other stuff follows. i am usually physically attracted after. this is based on the fact that many "physically attractive" people are only that and nothing more. how disappointing to be attracted to someone to only find out they are a shell and nothing more.

[Black Sunday]

ver 1.5

[JaneDead]

oh sure it makes sense and i agree with you. it is just that physical attraction is only one factor. it can't hold it all together... and in time that physical attraction might even fade and so you have to move on to a new level in your relationship. that is to say we are talking about relationships and not just physical attraction.

i would feel horrible if someone ONLY liked me cuz they we attracted to my looks. i have only so much to do with my looks. genetics are to blame for all that. well that and how well you take care of yourself after that...

[JaneDead]

see, i had an attractive ex once who used to be jealous if other guys liked me... so he would always tell me that they only liked me cuz of how i looked or to have sex etc... it bothered me that he would think that way of me (which i dont think he really did- i do believe he was just jealous) and not be able to acknowledge that maybe they saw something else in me, not just a physical trait.

[JaneDead]

oh and i have always been physically attracted to the person i am with. weither they are skinny, chubby, big nose, hot as hell. if i like someone, they become attractive to me no matter what. i will find all that there is in them to be attracted to- phyiscally and other wise.

[Black Sunday]

ver 1.5

[Nienna]

I agree Dynomite. A well loved face is always more attractive. I usually will be attracted to someone because of one or two key things about them physically, but the sexual desire comes from what's inside.

[Brenda Starrr]

You can't help but to notice someone's looks first. However, if there's no inner beauty, there's not a whole lot to be attracted to.

[Ginevra]

I've heard from various people I know that often they're not physically attracted to a person they like but they enjoy being in their company and later, the physical attraction happens because they like the personality of the person (which just reinforces what was said above.)

[Head Wreck]

the woman i'm hoplessly hooked on is possibly one of the most beutiful women on the face of the planet (even though she considers herself second rate and wont belive me otherwise).

tbh i wasnt drawn into her because of her looks, its not often that people exteriorly beutiful are also inside. but having been lumped into the same social category as her (everyone who thought it was cool to act crazy thought me and her were the genuine article and kept away, they cant stand real individuals it seems, that collage for you.)

fell in love with the way she laughs, how she sees the bright side in everything, the way she listned to me and stuck around even when i was depressed.

its a shame it didnt work out.

to this day i have only found 1 or two others like her, but yet she is unique

[fallennon]

I have to agree with Brenda here and say that looks are the first thing you notice. BUT, being an attractive woman I have found has nothing but problems. I know I know boo hoo my bad fortune...but seriously, it's hard for me to find someone who is intersted in ME and not so much in the way that I look.

Since I have become a dancer I have found that you may see a model with a guy like Chris Farley but you would never see Brad Pitt with a fat chick. It's strange...

Why do looks have to mean so much to one sex? I suppose this is a different thread, but it frustrates me to the point of no end. What makes this so?

[Brenda Starrr]

I am in no way your so-called "classic beauty". I asked my husband just the other night "What exactly attracted you to me when you first met me?" (When we first met, I was piss drunk and losing badly at a drinking game called "asshole")

He said that even though I was in the drunken condition, it was my laugh that got him. "You're laugh is like Julia Roberts', but evil. Like you're plotting doom."

He just rocks. No matter how shitty I look, how sick I am, how premenstrual....he loves me and tells me I'm hot.

[phee]

In a word... yes they do to anybody who is not blind, it matters on some level.

[JaneDead]

well i would also say this:

looks do NOT matter to ME. however i notice when someone is attractive based on MY opinions of "attractive" and when they are not but i don't fault the ugly people for being ugly. jk

in other words, for the most part, people can not help how they look. you are born the way you are born and are loveable either way. everyone deserves some lovin' no matter what. unless you are evil but that is another thread...

[phee]

everyone deserves some lovin' no matter what.

I do beleive this is true... but it is hard to say that looks don't matter... whether it has to do with "love" or not. On some subconscience level, one will treat people differently based upon there appearence.

[JaneDead]

well i think people will treat you different if you don't take care of yourself- not shower, get to be 500 pounds and in a bed with bed sores and 5 pizzas, stuff like that. but if just aren't "that good looking" based on something you have no control over- that is just vain. plain and simple. not saying people don't do it or that i might not even do it on some level. it is still vain no matter who you are if you do that.

[Sinfullyyours]

People who base their choice ofpartrners on looks are rarely happy. Looks shouldn't be a factor in who you grow old with.

[Scary Guy]

Looks count to anyone with a set of eyes. Size counts to anyone with a sense of touch and feeling in their system. Beauty is also in the eye of the beholder. Standards also have something to do with it.

Basically everyone has traits that they find attractive in other people (IE the ideal mate thread) and when said person matches physically (sex, age, ethnicity, size, height, eyes, hair, etc...) and mentally (politics, religion, sports, pizza topings, and all the other stuff most people can't agree on) most of the traits (all is pretty much impossible) you have 1/2 of a great relationship right there (obviously the other person must feel the same way for it to work). There is also the theory that opposits attract but most of the time that isn't the case.

On a side note my friend has the theory that ugly/fat people are smarter because they have to try harder. While this is not always true I know of a few good examples.

Also I think the KKK and skinheads proove that looks count. It's not my favorite example, but it is the most effective.

It's kind of ironic that I give such great advice on relationships (among other things) and yet I can't seem to get into a good one. I guess it would help if I wasn't a complete asshole

[Marblez]

I very much agree with dyno.

I will not be in a relationship with someone that I find unattractive. I have been in that position myself - unattractive to the person that I was with - and won't do that to another. Luckily, my opinion of "attraction" is intensely based on other than the physical.

I have been seriously involved with a man that was 6'7" 300+ lbs with blond hair, a man that was 5'7" 170 lbs with brown hair and also a man that is 5'11" 160 lbs who is bald. Aside from the generic human male features, These men have nothing physically in common.

Are/were any of these men any less or more attractive to me? At the time that I was with them - no. I never "settled" for an unattractive man, i had "the hots" for each of them. Would you have found them attractive? I don't know or care - to be honest.

To answer the question: Do looks matter? Yes.

It matters how he looks at me across the room.

It matters how he looks at me across the table.

It matters how he looks at me first thing in the morning.

It matters how he looks at me when I get dolled up and even when I am sick.

[Black Sunday]

ver 1.5

[Sinfullyyours]

It's kind of ironic that I give such great advice on relationships (among other things) and yet I can't seem to get into a good one. I guess it would help if I wasn't a complete asshole

Maybe you should reevaluate your opinions and you may find that you're not an asshole at all.

To answer the question: Do looks matter? Yes.

It matters how he looks at me across the room.

It matters how he looks at me across the table.

It matters how he looks at me first thing in the morning.

It matters how he looks at me when I get dolled up and even when I am sick.

I thought that was the best post in this thread thus far.

Physical attributes are a consideration, but personally, I think people would be much better off with an average looking partner, than with a drop dead gorgeous cunt who treats you like shit but looks good on your arm.

[Brenda Starrr]

Wayne looks at me first thing in the morning like I'm beautiful. In reality, I could haunt houses and get paid for it. I love that!

[JaneDead]

i love your post marblez

and i didn't mean to say that people who thinks looks matter are vain/shallow. i meant that people who only care about or care too much about looks are vain/shallow.

i happen to think my husband is hot. and i know that others do too and i am sure others don't at all. but yeah he is hot to me and i have been attracted to him since the day i met him.

[Black Sunday]

ver 1.5