DGN member for President

[Dollardave]

double d i don't think you could stop thinking about big boobs and porn long enough to run the country

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I do got my associates in computer information systems - microcomputers in business from Macomb tho. I'm pretty smart.

[JaneDead]

oh i don't doubt that you are smart. i doubt you could keep your mind off boobs though.

[Fierce Critter]

...the United States constitution dissallows anyone under the age of 35 from being elected to the executive position. That leaves us with HH or Brenda, or $Dave....

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

And Yours Truly.

My platform:

First and foremost, Civil Liberties - No laws may be passed discriminating against anyone's religion (or lack thereof), race, sexual preference, etc.

The "Golden Rule" shall apply when laws are written. "Does said act intentionally or unintentionally cause ACTUAL harm to another (and not just "bother" them)" shall be the barometer of whether or not a law is necessary or merited.

Medicine shall become a totally non-profit venture, particularly hospitals. And a nationwide socialized medical plan (including dental, vision, etc.) will be established.

Campaign reform: There will be a fund established to finance the campaigns of ALL hopeful candidates. No monies may be applied towards campaigns that do NOT come from said funds. All media will be required to "donate" a percentage of time toward making each candidate's platform known. (The hitches in this plan are many and the whole idea may be for naught, but I'd like to see something like this happen...)

Before any monies are given to other countries, our own shall be taken care of FIRST.

Teachers salaries will be increased exponentially. With that will come careful reviews of teacher abilities & effectiveness. Ineffective teachers will be taken out of the system.

Anyone caught abusing an animal will have the same treatment applied to them. (o.k. - that one will never pass, but I sure as hell would like to see some fuckhead who thinks it's funny to leash a dog to his bumper and then drive 55 until the dog collapses and is dragged to his death end up with the same thing done to him.)

The judicial system will be seriously revamped. The death penalty will be abolished, if only to prevent inevitable judicial fuck-ups to not result in the death of a 2nd innocent person. Those caught red-handed or with credible, multiple witnesses performing serious, serious crimes will become laboratory specimens. That's right - you rob a bank and kill a guard, your eyes become testing ground for household products. No more ouchy bunny eyes. And I bet that'd make a lot more criminals think twice than simple, painless execution.

And any judicial system member (lawyer, judge, etc.) caught fucking with evidence/etc. will be immediately removed from their position indefinitely and seriously penalized. No 2nd chances. Period.

Alternative forms of energy would be sought, implemented and made available for all the nation's people. SUV's would be outlawed except where absolutely necessary. Any vehicles not meeting a certain MPG would be destroyed. Replacements would be made available to those who can't afford to buy new through some kind of social program, so that all vehicles on the road would conform to updated standards.

EVERY HUMAN will be REQUIRED to spend one day every 5 years or so at a landfill so they can experience the ungodly waste that goes on, so that it might abate through reuse & recycling.

The electoral college is GONE. Majority rules.

If you don't like it, you get a free 1-way boat ticket to another continent.

That's all time allows for now. I humbly submit my (sadly) far-fetched dream of candidacy for your electoral consideration.

[Eric Cartman]

I'm gonna run for president and rule the world, even tho Im only 8 years old I think everyone will respect my authoritii!! or I'll kick em all in the nutz

[JaneDead]

so far critter is winning my vote...

[Shade Everdark]

I'm glad none of you have listed me as a candidate, because quite honestly, I'd make a horrible President. Far too much of a socialist for this country.

I fancy myself, however, an excellent dictator.

[Fierce Critter]

I, too, have quite socialist ideals.

However, I believe in capitalism, ugly as it can be. So I would temper my socialist leanings.

I'd be a capitalist with lots of social programs.

[phee]

I am starting up the first Pheeistic government... who is with me?

[Paper Hearts]

I like American democracy because it's better to be opressed by an entire ruling class rather than just a 'single' dictator.

No.

I'm for equal representation. And free alcohol.

Plus, again, I'll meet or beat all of my competitor's deals.

[Steven]

Well,

whomever of you finally wins the right to the presidency, can I ask for a few small favours such as....

1) the quick death of all career criminals rotting and butt raping in our far too expensive and over crowded prison systems.

2) the instant deportation of all illegal aliens, those who do not wish to claim a motherland can be sent to Cuba with a box of Blunts. And mandate that those who have entered this country through LEGAL means (such as my grandparents) must now utilize ENGLISH as their primary language. Those who refuse - get the fuck out.

3) place our military on the borders and actually seal them.

4) stop allowing American Business to manufacture overseas

5) stop passing american schoolchildren through the system who cannot read and or write

6) force processed food manufacturers to ensure a much higher content of actual vitamins and fiber.

7) Stop all career wellfare handouts. Limit via timelines, the amount of public assitance given to those who'd really rather not join the republic of worker bees.

8) Quit dicking around and flat tax us - level the playing field, let everyone share the burden.

9) Stop trying to take our guns. Thats what Hitler did before he overtook everyone.

10) Honor your veterans and working soldiers, provide them housing, insurance, and appropriate healthcare throughout their lives, stop letting them rot and die in understaffed VA Hospitals.

11) Abandon this needless and emasculating bent toward political correctness, censorship through the FCC, and pull down those fucking Big Brother cameras over the highways and roads in towns all over this nation.

like I said, just a few favors I'm asking......

Steven

[Guest Game of Chance]

Well,

whomever of you finally wins the right to the presidency, can I ask for a few small favours such as....

1)  the quick death of all career criminals rotting and butt raping in our far too expensive and over crowded prison systems.

2)  the instant deportation of all illegal aliens, those who do not wish to claim a motherland can be sent to Cuba with a box of Blunts.  And mandate that those who have entered this country through LEGAL means (such as my grandparents) must now utilize ENGLISH as their primary language.  Those who refuse - get the fuck out.

3)  place our military on the borders and actually seal them.

4)  stop allowing American Business to manufacture overseas

5)  stop passing american schoolchildren through the system who cannot read and or write

6)  force processed food manufacturers to ensure a much higher content of actual vitamins and fiber.

7)  Stop all career wellfare handouts.  Limit via timelines, the amount of public assitance given to those who'd really rather not join the republic of worker bees.

8)  Quit dicking around and flat tax us - level the playing field, let everyone share the burden.

9)  Stop trying to take our guns.  Thats what Hitler did before he overtook everyone.

10)  Honor your veterans and working soldiers, provide them housing, insurance, and appropriate healthcare throughout their lives, stop letting them rot and die in understaffed VA Hospitals.

11) Abandon this needless and emasculating bent toward political correctness, censorship through the FCC, and pull down those fucking Big Brother cameras over the highways and roads in towns all over this nation.

like I said, just a few favors I'm asking......

Steven

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I'm voting for Steven, as long as he plans on keeping his adminstration secular.

[Msterbeau]

I'm for FC too.

Although I have a minor complaint about destroying cars that don't get good mileage. For those you get a special license plate that only allows you to drive "X" miles per year. After that it turns a bright red. Too many neat old cars to just destroy them... sorry. :erm

I have to say, also .....PH's "Walk throught the hood and screw everyone" platform has a certain appeal.

[paradox]

id vote fer myself. :grin

[Fierce Critter]

I'm for FC  too. 

Although I have a minor complaint about destroying cars that don't get good mileage.  For those you get a special  license plate that only allows you to drive "X" miles per year.  After that it turns a bright red.  Too many neat old cars to just destroy them... sorry.    :erm

I have to say, also .....PH's "Walk throught the hood and screw everyone" platform has a certain appeal. 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That's a great compromise. I'd like a '69 Camaro myself.

Just keep in mind the cost of gas by then will be about $25 a gallon.

[Dollardave]

oh i don't doubt that you are smart. i doubt you could keep your mind off boobs though.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I doubt your wrong heh. Also I aint 35 yet paul damn man adding years to the ticker.

[TomCat]

I can't say I would vote for any of you. No offense.. but in all the political debates.. I have as yet to see anyone do anything but either bitch or whine about how it should be. i have never seen anyone say what they would do to fix anything thats wrong.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

There goes your lofty cabinet position once i get elected. Bitch. LOL

[Brenda Starrr]

I'd vote for Critter.

[phee]

What is this a popularity contest!!!??? well I guess so.

[Scary Guy]

This is a poll and should go in the poll section.

Also I'd vote for myself (basically throwing it away heh).

[bean]

I vote for Critter! (though Homicidalheathen is still a possibility cause I would get to go to Europe!!)

[Jarodaka]

even though i don't necessarily agree with the poltical views of these people; this is who i would vote for or think are worthy to run in the first place:

in alphabetical order:

black sunday/monday

daniel

fierce critter

game of chance

jarod

marblez

paper hearts

pomba gira

the dark

the eternal

torn asunder

zhukovcodeslinger

and phee of course would be the vice president

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Hmm, so if we're going by Dynomite's order of preference, the cabinet would look something like this:

President black sunday/monday

1. Vice President - daniel

2. Speaker of the House of Representatives - fierce critter

3. President pro tempore of the Senate - game of chance

4. Secretary of State - jarod (me! sweet!)

5. Secretary of the Treasury - marblez

6. Secretary of Defense - paper hearts

7. Attorney General - pomba gira

8. Secretary of the Interior - the dark

9. Secretary of Agriculture - the eternal

10. Secretary of Commerce - torn asunder

11. Secretary of Labor - zhukovcodslinger

12. Secretary of Health and Human Services

13. Secretary of Housing and Urban Development

14. Secretary of Transportation

15. Secretary of Energy

16. Secretary of Education

17. Secretary of Veterans Affairs

Dammit, I typed all this out and saw that Phee would be veep. Well, I'm sorry, Phee, but I want to be Secretary of State!

[Msterbeau]

I'll take secretary of transportation... heh.

[Brenda Starrr]

Can I be Monica Lewinsky???

[Steven]

I'm voting for Steven, as long as he plans on keeping his adminstration secular.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

...it is my solemn promise upon taking office to definately NOT create a

God-Squad administration (I'd never get anything done if I did that and I plan on killing a bunch of bad people).

- The Prez

[JaneDead]

Hmm, so if we're going by Dynomite's order of preference, the cabinet would look something like this:

President black sunday/monday

  1. Vice President - daniel

  2. Speaker of the House of Representatives - fierce critter

  3. President pro tempore of the Senate - game of chance

  4. Secretary of State - jarod (me!  sweet!)

  5. Secretary of the Treasury - marblez

  6. Secretary of Defense - paper hearts

  7. Attorney General - pomba gira

  8. Secretary of the Interior - the dark

  9. Secretary of Agriculture - the eternal

  10. Secretary of Commerce - torn asunder

  11. Secretary of Labor - zhukovcodslinger

  12. Secretary of Health and Human Services

  13. Secretary of Housing and Urban Development

  14. Secretary of Transportation

  15. Secretary of Energy

  16. Secretary of Education

  17. Secretary of Veterans Affairs

Dammit, I typed all this out and saw that Phee would be veep.  Well, I'm sorry, Phee, but I want to be Secretary of State!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

you forgot too my choices were only alphabetical not really by my top choices