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~funny quotes of dgn~


JaneDead

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If you weigh 700 lbs

or

If your boobs hang around your ankles, you may want to save the electrical tape for better uses,

like patching up your home.

Less is more.

Accentuate your best features.

Sometimes it's sexier to make people want to know what's behind door number 2, instead of putting it in their faces.

(Notable exception: The couple that looks like they're trying out for the Jerry Springer Show. I need you guys for entertainment, just as much as I need the leather twins with the jetpacks.)

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from an IM with Candy:

anywho, the sun is out, and its all cute and sparkely out there... until you open the door, and reailze the sun is a LIAR, and its fucking cold. then those little sparkels of prettiness are just the sparkles of numb and coldness set to destroy your body heat and make you want to be in the house all day.
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Here's how my middle names came to be. My Korean surname was Lee, so my parents decided that both my brother and I would retain our last names, as our middle names. So we were often called Ug & Home.. (get it?) by our relatives as a joke. It's kinda mean but we never saw it that way.
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  • 3 weeks later...

I have a different take.

First, you need to ask yourself, IS she a cunt??

That is, is she indeed a walking 5' tall Vagina?

If the answer is no, then I would try to cease calling her that.

Now, on the other hand, if she is a bitch,

female-dog.jpg

then I would cease seeing her, because man-dog love is just plain wrong.

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  • 2 weeks later...

And he says 'because you pray for dumb shit, like world peace. You've got to pray for REAL problems, like not getting White Castle,'

Hehe sass, I'm quoting Guy, but you said it, so you get the credit.. hehe

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