I believe I am depressed

[bean]

I have to respectfully and cautiously disagree with you here in part on this one...but bear in mind that all situations are individual......(I'll try to be concise)

My wife comes from a family of medicated people.

Anxiety/Panic Attack's

Chrones Disease/ulcers

Manic Depression

and - her father had to be institutionalized at Eloise and given shock treatments, etc.

Her sister has it, her nephews have it.  All are heavily medicated and are on the constantly roller coastering ride of switching meds when one type no lnger works.

Laura too (many years ago now) had it.

And was medicated.  As is understandable.

She have breakdowns and panic attacks constantly where she was sure she was dying, or simply never want to get out of bed because she had shut down.  We went thru this for a couple of years.  It was very difficult.  It grew worse and worse.

After some time she decided that she hated being medicated, hated what it (the meds) did to her, hated the part of herself that she lsot through meds, and HATED living a lifestyle that tagged her as unable to function without chemical assistance. 

So we went searching...and searching...and searching......

we did alot fo ditch digging, beleive me, both of us.

We took a multi-phase approach that has worked for over ten years now - no meds, none at all, and no more panic attacks or bouts of depression.

1)  Counseling - individually for her (originally) and then as a couple.  Increase the quality of your life, increase your  intimacy, learn to work as a team to cut out thigns that bring on anxiety and fear or faithlessness.  Team Effort.  this eventually moved onward to Christian based counseling, because we are christians and wanted a foundational aproach that we both could draw from.  To exemplify this - even now, we have been seeing a liscensed Christian Counselor over the last couple of months (the first 6 weeks were free thru our church and the rest is very affordable) to help us deal with some recent family drama that has stirred up things.  It has helped tremendously - mostly because thigns are dealt with as oppsed to just storing them up with everything else we have to deal with....

2)  Nutrional.  We found a medical doctor (an actual MD) that everyone said was a quack - because he treated the body with vitamin and mineral supplimentation and used homeopathic approaches.  He did a special bloodtest and hair test on Laura (that regular doctors also call quakery) to look for specific deposits of bad elements in her system (via the modern world) and to look for low levels of neccessary nutrients.  His approach was that you cannot just throw a bunch of vitamins at someone and say its good - because most people's system's ahve depeleted their natural abilites to absorb and or synthesize nutrients properly - which in turn creates multiple chemical IMBALENCES in the brain and other organs.  Laura had high traces of mercury from old fillings in her teeth.  We got rid of all of that and replaced it with porcelein.  She had multiple problems absorbing certain minerals her body needed.  And she had an overload of estrogen in her liver that needed to be flushed out.  He put her on a clean out program to flush out the estrogen and warned me that she would lose her mind for a little while while her liver released all this stored up stuff.  And----- she did.  But she also got straightened out. 

3)  Faith based inner reflection.  Were Christians, so thats what we used, but we went to work on digging thru our past (both of us) and dealing with our secret haunts, which everybody has.  We learned to undo certain things.  Forgive certain things, and shut some doors.  There are many triggers in our heads just waiting for the right time to start causing havoc.  To explore, expose, and understand those triggers deletes much of their power and secrecy - which creates a degree of control, which in turn creates a degree of peace.

Laura and I are not perfect and life is not perfect and we have problems like anyone else.  But we also do not rely on pharmecuticals anymore, nor do we buy into the beleif that we are simply "predisposed" and therfore powerless.  Predisposition is a fact.  Powerlessness.....is a popular (and profitable mind you) trend.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

At first, I was trying to figure out where you were disagreeing with me, since I had used the term "sometimes" for many things in my post. Then I realized what you were referring to must have been this:

You may not even need medication, but it does seem as though depression runs in your family, so if it was passed on to you, you have no control over that and it's something you can't take care of on your own.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I wasn't trying to imply that just because you have a predisopsition to mental illness that means you are powerless against it. In your post you stated ways you and your wife got help, with the homeopathic doctor, using faith etc. Those things helped with the problem at hand, you didn't just try to deal with it on your own. As far as my stating that you have no control over the predisposition, what I meant was you can't change the fact that the mental illness was passed on to you, but you can take care of the problem. I should have stated that more clearly.

Having said that, I too come from a family with a history of mental illness: bipolar, major depression, anxiety and panic attacks. These things have all been passed on to me. I've been on many many different medications that didn't work, therapists that didn't care/had no idea what they were doing, and so on. I had gotten away from my spirituality for a while. One day, I decided to get back into it. I'm a Buddhist, and I meditate every day, and it has really helped me control my illnesses. I still have times where things go a bit down hill, but I know how to work with it, and I am currently seeing a therapist who helps me out a great deal. I've learned what I need to stay away from (still working to cut back on drinking, as that greatly affects the bipolarism) and what I need to embrace to make myself better. For me, medication didn't work, but it often does for other people. We just need to find what is right for ourselves.

Several studies have shown that spirituality, no matter what you belive in, does seem to help people with mental illness live a better quality of life.

[Onyx]

Spirituality, nutrition and all those things do definitely help, (and everyone, depressed or not, should take care of these things in their life of course) and sometimes they are enough.

However, this can be a very very dangerous thing to suggest as the only treatment - I have seen people go off their meds and go on to kill themselves or in the case of psychotic people, someone else.

There are many cases where all those things will help but still not be enough.

There is also an attitude in some circles (often Christian circles) that if you take medication that means that you are not spiritual enough or that you are lacking in some way.

I went through this with my migraine treatment. I was looked down upon by people in my church for using needed pain medication as if I were doing it recreationally. I have at long last after many years found a medication with no terrible side effects that prevents nearly all my migraines and I haven't had to take pain meds in a long while now.

Sometimes medication is needed. Sometimes you have to try 20 different ones before you find something that you can tolerate that works.

I hate taking medication but I hate not being able to live my life, so I take it. I feel like the luckiest person in the world sometimes when I have a whole entire day without pain. It's given me my life back.

Depression will steal your life away if you let it, so do whatever works for you, and keep trying until you find something that helps.

[bean]

I know someone who has paranoid schizophrenia and they have to be on medication, otherwise they are very violent and are a danger to themselves and others.

"Depression will steal your life away if you let it, so do whatever works for you, and keep trying until you find something that helps"

-Onyx, that is so true..very well put.

[Fierce Critter]

Just a note...

I'm a firm believer that meds & counseling go hand-in-hand. I also strongly believe I'm the type that can possibly benefit strictly from counseling.

However, I also am aware that true depression is often due to a physiological cause, NOT strictly mental.

I would like to think I only need counseling. I have been through counseling in the past, not for depression, but for a very unhappy, confused period. Luckily, I had a counselor who recognized my intelligence, my exceptional skill at self-analysis, and knew better than to patronize or "lead" me. Our sessions almost entirely consisted of me talking. She only infrequently had to offer insight. After about 6 months, I was the one who said, "I don't think I need you anymore" and her response was, "I don't think so either - you're o.k." And we hugged goodbye and I never went back.

I consulted a different therapist years later for a different situation. And after one visit, I quit. In our initial consult, she was very leading and obviously making something out of nothing in a couple areas. At one point, I told her I was above average when it comes to intellect and awareness where my own self was concerned. Her response? In an incredibly patronizing tone of voice, "Oh - I'll be careful." That was all I needed to know she wasn't going to work for me.

Again, I would like to think my current state of being could be "cured" with simple counseling. But family history and the abject failure of all attempts to "fix" myself for the past 4 years have started to convince me this may be more than mental.

If a medication helps me be "normal", I take it. I need allergy meds to be able to enjoy my furchildren. No problem there. I needed Prilosec for a while for horrible acid reflux, but I've managed to get over that, so that med went bye-bye. My thyroid is faulty, so I need to consult an endocrinologist and get back on something for that. I'd rather not add to the 2 I need to be on right now.

But I also won't go on this way, without a medication of some kind, if there's something out there that can help balance me out.

IF - repeat IF - I need it. If they - and I - determine this is something that, in fact, can be kicked by weekly counseling, then Jon and I will simply have to straighten-up financially and have the $20 outpatient copay there every week.

In fact, I am hoping for that.

[Steven]

At first, I was trying to figure out where you were disagreeing with me, since I had used the term "sometimes" for many things in my post.  Then I realized what you were referring to must have been this:

I wasn't trying to imply that just because you have a predisopsition to mental illness that means you are powerless against it.  In your post you stated ways you and your wife got help, with the homeopathic doctor, using faith etc.  Those things helped with the problem at hand, you didn't just try to deal with it on your own.  As far as my stating that you have no control over the predisposition, what I meant was you can't change the fact that the mental illness was passed on to you, but you can take care of the problem.  I should have stated that more clearly.

Having said that, I too come from a family with a history of mental illness:  bipolar, major depression, anxiety and panic attacks.  These things have all been passed on to me.  I've been on many many different medications that didn't work, therapists that didn't care/had no idea what they were doing, and so on.  I had gotten away from my spirituality for a while.  One day, I decided to get back into it.  I'm a Buddhist, and I meditate every day, and it has really helped me control my illnesses.  I still have times where things go a bit down hill, but I know how to work with it, and I am currently seeing a therapist who helps me out a great deal.  I've learned what I need to stay away from (still working to cut back on drinking, as that greatly affects the bipolarism) and what I need to embrace to make myself better.  For me, medication didn't work, but it often does for other people.  We just need to find what is right for ourselves.

Several studies have shown that spirituality, no matter what you belive in, does seem to help people with mental illness live a better quality of life.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

that was a good post babe, thanks for clarifying where you were coming from.

Steven

[Steven]

Spirituality, nutrition and all those things do definitely help, (and everyone, depressed or not, should take care of these things in their life of course) and sometimes they are enough.

However, this can be a very very dangerous thing to suggest as the only treatment - I have seen people go off their meds and go on to kill themselves or in the case of psychotic people, someone else. 

There are many cases where all those things will help but still not be enough.

There is also an attitude in some circles (often Christian circles) that if you take medication that means that you are not spiritual enough or that you are lacking in some way. 

I went through this with my migraine treatment.  I was looked down upon by people in my church for using needed pain medication as if I were doing it recreationally.  I have at long last after many years found a medication with no terrible side effects that prevents nearly all my migraines and I haven't had to take pain meds in a long while now. 

Sometimes medication is needed.  Sometimes you have to try 20 different ones before you find something that you can tolerate that works. 

I hate taking medication but I hate not being able to live my life, so I take it.  I feel like the luckiest person in the world sometimes when I have a whole entire day without pain.  It's given me my life back. 

Depression will steal your life away if you let it, so do whatever works for you, and keep trying until you find something that helps.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Good points, well made and I understand.

What I'm talking bout here in general is balance.

Look at all your options, use your instinct, get 2nd opinions, explore whats available. And your right that its dangerous to take yoruself off of meds just like that, I dont mean to encourage that approach either...nor is it a balanced and healthy approach.

And that crap you went thru at church.....I hate that kind of shit and I'm sorry you went thru it. To accept that approach (again - a total lack of balance) then one must wonder why since one of Christs own Apostles was a physician - why didint Jesus tell him to deny his vocation and that faith was all he needed? Um, because thats bullshit thats why. When my head hurts I take asprin. If my butt explodes I take pepto bismol. If I break my leg you can sign my caste that I got over at Garden City Hospital. On the flipside - I kicked heavy drugs because of my faith, so in some cases its certainly can apply.

[Fierce Critter]

I went to the study today.

And opted out.

After some extensive screening, it was definitely determined that I am suffering from severe depression.

But the study is strictly to check the effectiveness of medication. Not only is there no counseling, but the doseage given is not regulated based on need, condition, etc. Whatever they pull from a hat basically is what you get - including, possibly, a placebo.

I chose not to take part. Because I definitely need help. Whether that would strictly be counseling, or counseling along with medication. But this study isn't there to help me - it's there to study.

So I managed to track down my former counselor today, via Google of all things. Sent her an e-mail, and she'd love to work with me again.

Gotta call both her and my PPO tomorrow to ensure they'll cover visits with her. If not, I"ll have her recommend someone for me.

I'm almost gleeful about this. I might get to see my Nancy again!! :grin