connecting with my kids

[Lilith]

Ok so I was in the car the other day and my oldest says he likes the song on the radio and the band. It was a song by Greenday I forgot which one. I proceeded to tell him that the second time I saw Greenday in concert I was pregnant with him. He said "no wonder I like Greenday so much".

So we get home, I pull out my old copy of Dookie and the kid takes it and has not giving it back, stating "I found it interesting". Since then I have heard him share the cd with his friends and they all like it.

I Just thought this was awesome, we connected (not that I LOVE greenday like kids Love a band) on a level that I am sure most kids and parents don’t ever really get to do, I just saw this as the first step in developing a type of friendship with my kid. I can see us (in the future) heading to Cobo for the “some sold out" greenday show and having a good time just listening to music, and dropping some of the mom/child roles.

maybe I feel I am different, as brain and I have already taken him to the Sold Out M&M show at cobo a year or so ago. His first concert, I enjoyed it, he enjoyed it Brian enjoyed it and I was happy to be there on main floor with him to share the experience. We allowed him to take a break from his “good boy” image and give ole M the finger and sing all the lyrics with out stopping at the bad words like we make him do at home. I got allot of slack, mainly from family members who thought it was wrong, but my thoughts are the more I show him there is a time and a place for certain things and the more I allow him to be his own person and the more I can connect with him on these levels, the longer I can keep him safe, if he grows up learning mom can be cool with things that are important but not life threatening, the more he will come to me when it comes time for him to have sex or try drugs n drinking and maybe I will have the opportunity to guide him toward a less harmful path.

The kid is awesome he went out and busted his ass for 10 hours yesterday with his dad to "make money for the family" his words not mine.

He is an old soul, he is awesome and I am thankful to have such a great kid.

I just think if at nine he can be so adult about some things then he should earn certain privileges adults get with some guidance from hip ole mom.

I think this turned out to be longer and headed in many different directions then I planned. I just wanted to share how great it is to connect with your kid on a

level he may connect with someone that cant gound him.

share you thoughts, stories, anything, i love hearing about others n what they think especially from those whom are more open to hte reality of today world.

[fallennon]

First, I want to say that I commend you! This is exactly the type of parenting that I would LOVE to use with my son. And I agree...if you teach him that there is a time and place for everything...

I am just amazed...nothing to share, sorry. I don't want to derail the thread here but I just had to say something. I'll stop myself here because as a psych major I could go on for hours...LOL

[Lilith]

First, I want to say that I commend you!  This is exactly the type of parenting that I would LOVE to use with my son.  And I agree...if you teach him that there is a time and place for everything...

I am just amazed...nothing to share, sorry.  I don't want to derail the thread here but I just had to say something.  I'll stop myself here because as a psych major I could go on for hours...LOL

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

fthank you as i have so many who think we are nuts and our kids will turn out to be deliquents, who knows maybe they will only time will tell....... It is just nice to hear a compliment.

i would be intersted hearing your point of view being you are a psych major, and i would not see it as derailing the thread although i can see how it could a this issue is so complicated.

thanx again