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Are you compassionate?


Fierce Critter

Which statement best describes your level of compassion?  

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Some have it better than I do, some have it worse. Compassion solves nothing. I have a want to help those who can not help themselves. I wouldn't call it compassion though. However if you don't have the desire to help yourself I certainly won't even think twice about you. On the other hand I hate to accept help, or recieve compassion from others. I think it's all really issues in my own head though. It's just my way, not necessarilly the "right" way.

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I have a problem getting help from others. I always have this feeling that they are belittling me. I don't mind helping other out with anything, provided its something I am good at.

My head is all messed up tho. If I don't know something, you can show me how. But for some reason, I feel like a child if I didn't know it.

*rawr* My brain is my own enemy sometimes.

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I am compassionate.

Maybe there is a too much?

but, you gotta look at the big picture w/ people. Why are they like that? How where they brought up? What kind of hand has life delt them? Etc... Etc...

Maybe they have had a shitty hand. Maybe they were brought up in a racial household. Perhaps it is the influence of their peers, or even tv, movies media etc...

When there is nothing you can do for them, there is nothing you can do. You can only outline what your expectations are and/or what your limits are as far as how much you will take. And leave it at that. I try to keep myself available for people that are in trouble or troubled...but I certainly keep my distances.

As far as emotions go, I try to keep at lease level. I Try to set myself up for a realistic outcome, sort of ammo against dissapointment. Can't have high expectations. Too many times I built that up and been let down.

Again, I just try to keep myself available....maybe lend an ear, some advice, some sympathy, some dinner, a smoke, maybe if I find the reasoning to be reasonable, I might lend a few bucks, but thats about it. I have my own life to worry about, my own drama, my own issues etc....

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Some have it better than I do, some have it worse. Compassion solves nothing. I have a want to help those who can not help themselves. I wouldn't call it compassion though. However if you don't have the desire to help yourself I certainly won't even think twice about you. On the other hand I hate to accept help, or recieve compassion from others. I think it's all really issues in my own head though. It's just my way, not necessarilly the "right" way.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

sad, this point of view.

compassion can actaully solve many things, because it opens the door to trust and communication. And had no one ever had compassion for me, then I'd have become the complete asshole I was being reared to be.....and I would have learned nothign, because no one would have invested in me.

compassion when misplaced by the way...is no longer compassion....it instead becomes a form of rescue, which usually is not blanced or healthy. We often take what is/was intended to be a sound ideal and mis-direct it - yet we try to call it the same thing when in reality it is not.

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Guest Megalicious

I really cant answer this ..

I can be really compassionate ..and other times I wouldnt give a fuck if you payed me too. ...

It has to do with my moods. But in general I think Im compassionate. Id like to believe that, but I can look back at my life and see times where I really wasnt compassionate at all.

To be honest, Im somewhere in the middle. Im trying to be more compassionate and understanding now. My past is my past and I have to let it go or it will eat me from the inside out. I can only try to better myself.

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Guest Megalicious

You know.. I dont really think anyone can answer this with an real truth. This is a sujective topic... what anyone person deems as compassion may not be by others.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Thats actually a really good point Dark.

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Perhaps this will help.

Compassion

Main Entry: com·pas·sion

Function: noun

Pronunciation: k&m-'pa-sh&n

Etymology: Middle English, from Middle French or Late Latin; Middle French, from Late Latin compassion-, compassio, from compati to sympathize, from Latin com- + pati to bear, suffer -- more at PATIENT

: sympathetic consciousness of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it

I think it bears clarifying that you can feel desire to alleviate other's distress, yet not actually act on that desire, to be compassionate.

Seems pretty clear to me - sympathizing with and desiring help for others in distress is compassion. One can see someone needs help, yet not know HOW to help - and still be compassionate. One can not be able to help - but still is compassionate. One may offer or enact what may, in actuality, not be what a person in distress actually needs, but the desire and sympathy makes the offer/action compassionate.

For instance, I'm driving down the road and I see an old woman with a flat tire.

1) I have the knowledge of how to help her, so I stop and do it successfully. That's compassion.

2) I don't know how to help her, but I stop and try, and end up putting a hole in her spare. I was still compassionate, just a fuck-up at changing tires.

3) I don't know how to help her, and knowing I could make the situation worse, I don't stop. But I still sympathize with her, and wish I knew how to change her tire. That's compassion.

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So if you see someone doing something harmful to themselves and feel sympathy for what they are going through, wanting the harm to discontinue, all the while wishing that you could smack them real hard telling them to wake up - is that still compassion?

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