Actual Dear Abby letters?

[Miranda]

Abigail Van Buren (Dear Abby) admitted she was at a total loss to answer these:

Dear Abby,

A couple of women moved in across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher, and the other is a social worker in her mid twenties. These two women go everywhere together, and I've never seen a man go into their apartment or come out. Do you think they could be Lebanese?

Dear Abby,

What can I do about all the sex, nudity, language and violence on my VCR?

Dear Abby,

I have a man I never could trust. He cheats so much I'm not even sure this baby I'm carrying is even his.

Dear Abby,

I am a twenty-three-year-old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive, and I think my boyfriend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.

Dear Abby,

I suspected that my husband had been fooling around, and when I confronted him with the evidence he denied everything and said it would never happen again. Should I believe him?

Dear Abby,

Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?

Dear Abby,

I joined the Navy to see the world. I've seen it. Now, how do I get out?

Dear Abby,

My forty-year-old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50 an hour every week for two-and-a-half years. He must be crazy.

Dear Abby,

Do you think it would be all right if I gave my doctor a little gift? I tried for years to get pregnant and couldn't, and he did it.

Dear Abby,

My mother is mean and short-tempered. Do you think she is going through her mental pause?

Dear Abby,

You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex years ago and he IS a doctor. What now?

__________________

[Homicidalheathen]

Please tell me Americans are not this stupid. :blink

[AstralCrux]

Well where I work there is an elevator positioned in such a way that if you walk in the front door and keep going straight you'll hit it. I get asked every day where the elevator is.

Telephones are challenging for these people, so are tv remotes.

[slingerlandstyx]

Where I work, the napkins are right in front of you where you get handed your sandwiches. The lids and straws are directly behind you, not 3 feet away when you're getting your drink at the soda fountain machine. We get asked where these items are countless times each day. I've thought about taking bets on how many times we get asked during the bar rush friday nights.

[The Rod]

Well where I work there is an elevator positioned in such a way that if you walk in the front door and keep going straight you'll hit it.  I get asked every day where the elevator is.

Telephones are challenging for these people, so are tv remotes.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

God, I soooo know how that feels...

[AstralCrux]

OMG people are dumber than cattle! Styx and I did march of dimes. Why is it so hard to use a fucking crosswalk! Just speed around a group of people trying to walk for fucking charity! You can run them over, it's ok.

[slingerlandstyx]

OMG people are dumber than cattle!  Styx and I did march of dimes.  Why is it so hard to use a fucking crosswalk!  Just speed around a group of people trying to walk for fucking charity!  You can run them over, it's ok.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

*We directed parking and traffic at the M o D in Troy, by the civic center.

[AstralCrux]

Who goes to the library on a friggin Sunday when they've known for how long that the March of Dimes was going on? Sure, they were having a meeting!